


Blue Puppet Confessionals

by Vmwrites



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, mentioned/referenced eating disorders, please look out for trigger warnings!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-08-14
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:08:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 52,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24342538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vmwrites/pseuds/Vmwrites
Summary: In an attempt to build a stronger team bond, Karasuno's volleyball club takes a visit to the 24 hour 'Blue Puppet Escape Rooms' for a night of fun and strategy.If only they knew that what they thought would build the team up would only break them down.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi, Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Comments: 185
Kudos: 472





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! This is my first time writing something pretty big for the Haikyuu fandom. Remember to check the notes I'll leave here at the start of every chapter for potential trigger warnings! I'll likely be posting once awake, maybe even more depending on if I get busy with work.

Tensions were at a high in the practice room at Karasuno High school as the volleyball team just couldn't get anything _right._

It was a rather usual occurrence for them, Coach Ukai and Mr. Takeda would leave for the day, allowing the boys to practice in all of their 'teenagers with no authority present' glory, and they would argue.

On this particular Friday afternoon, Hinata was struggling to hit any of Kageyama's tosses, resulting in the frustrations in the both of them to build.

Hinata had enough, "You're tossing too fast!"

"You're the one who can't keep up," Kageyama snapped, "Maybe you need a break. Swap out with someone." 

Kageyama turned around to where Daichi was standing, raising his voice to ensure that he hears him, "Hinata's ready to be switched out! Send somebody else in!"

Daichi went to sigh and put his hand up to silence the argument, but Tsukishima had some antagonizing quiet words of his own from the other side of the court.

"Looks like the king is back," he tsked with a smirk.

"What did you just say?" Kageyama's attention turned to Tsukishima as he began to march towards him, all intentions of shoving him once he got there.

"Hey!" Tanaka called, walking forward to stand in the area that laid between them. His forearm found its way up to Kageyama's chest, blocking him from moving.

"Get off me," he threatened, trying to push him off in the process.

"No. You need to calm down."

"Maybe you need to calm down. You're missing every receive that gets sent to you. You should switch out too," once again, Kageyama turned his head in Daichi's direction, "Switch out Tanaka while you're at it!"

Tanaka's anger with the younger grew and he shoved him back roughly, doing what he imagined Kageyama would have done to Tsukishima had he made it over to him. 

"Oh no you guys don't!" Daichi yelled as he stomped over to where they were standing. Grabbing the back of each of their shirts, he flung them apart, making Kageyama nearly fall to the ground and Tanaka bump into Tsukishima who was standing to his left.

He huffed as he adjusted the glasses on his face, "God, watch it."

Tanaka turned to face him, a rather frightening mixed look of anger and shock on his face, "You better what that mouth of yours you little-"

"Okay, okay," Suga's gentle voice spoke as he pulled Tanaka back toward him, "That's enough, let's have a water break okay? Everyone off the court."

With multiple groans of protest, the players made their ways off to the side where their bags filled with water and snacks sat. 

"Are you okay?" Yamaguchi asked as Tsukishima sat down next to him on the bench.

"You think I care?" He asked rhetorically with cockiness in his voice, making Yamaguchi smile.

Standing in front of Tanaka on the next bench over, Nishinoya was doing everything he could to keep Tanaka from getting up and knocking the glasses right off his face as he eavesdropped on the pairs quiet teasing. 

Hinata gulped at his water bottle in an unintentionally obnoxious way, to which Kageyama's irritation began to grow again. He was gripping the edge of the bench where he sat, knuckles turning white as he fought back a fling of his fist. Just as he was about to break and push Hinata's head back so far he would be out of commission for at least a week, Suga gave him a threatening look from the place of the court he still stood.

When the kind and understanding eyes Kageyama once knew turn into cold, hard, and authoritative ones, he knows it's time to back down. He could deal with everyone else being mad at him, but he felt a sense of remorse and guilt when it came to Suga. He couldn't ever find it in him to disobey his orders. Not after everything he's done.

Daichi stayed in his spot by Suga and observed as Kageyama's tensed up stance turned to that of mush as he cowered away from Suga's cold stare.

He couldn't fight back a slight smile as he shook his hand and placed his hands on his hips, "Impressive."

Suga shrugged, "Well, what can I say? Who wouldn't listen to me?"

"For that matter, me."

That one earned Daichi a jab to his side with Suga's elbow and he laughed as he felt the atmosphere lighten in the slightest way from their small acts of humor.

Asahi stood from his spot on the bench where he sat away from everyone and walked over to his fellow third years awkwardly. 

He offered them a small sad smile and Suga placed a gentle hand on his shoulder to greet him. They stood in a contented silence for a moment as they watched the younger boys before them. At the mere thought of the trouble they bring to each other, they shared a troubled sigh.

Asahi's eyes stayed pointed to the ground as he finally decided to speak up, "You know, things really haven't been the same lately."

Daichi was slightly taken aback by his comment and looked to his side to see the latter's face, "What do you mean?"

He shifted uncomfortably in his stance, eyes seeming to be fixed on the untied lace of his shoe that bounced around with every movement of his feet, "I mean since Kageyama got back from his camp. I mean, even I've been on the receiving end of his anger..."

Suga frowned as Asahi's voice trailed off, offering him a gentle squeeze to the arm of encouragement.

"I just feel like we haven't really been connecting that well," he continued, smiling slightly to Suga, "Not literally but it sort of seems like the team is falling apart a little bit...like we aren't able to work together."

Suga nodded at him with understanding and Daichi remained silent, eyes stern as he watched those on the bench. Asahi was right, it almost seemed clique-ey. If cliques could hold one to two people and were forced to constantly all spend time with each other.

For which ever way it looked, it didn't look like a team, and Daichi wasn't happy to see that.

"You're absolutely right Azumane," Daichi finally spoke, "Things have been a bit awkward."

Asahi frowned and nodded in agreement. He wasn't one to speak up, not even when Kageyama blew an outburst out onto him, but he felt they would never win another game if they couldn't properly work together. 

He shrugged, "I just thought I should tell you guys...didn't feel nice holding it in."

"You know you could tell us anything," Suga patted his back, "We're your friends, we're to help."

Asahi flashed him a small slight smile. One that read, _oh I wish I could._

"Thank you guys, I know."

With a pat on both of their shoulders, Asahi made his way back to the bench where his bag sat. Pulling out his own water bottle he too had an unintentionally obnoxious moment as he took a much needed gulp of water. Confrontation even if minor always left him with a dry throat. 

Suga crossed his arms, "What are we gonna do with them?"

"Oh, I know what we're gonna do," Daichi smirked, "We're going on a date."

Suga was caught off guard and nearly flinched, "Pardon?"

"Team date tonight," he said, slapping a hand down onto Suga's shoulder. Suga's expression changed as he realized he was referring to all of them and not just them as a pair. "I know just what we can do."

"And what would that be?" Suga's tensed shoulders now relaxed as he awaited Daichi's plan, the previous moment already shrugged off and away from his mind.

"Well, Asahi said it himself, the team hasn't been able to work together for a while, so what better thing to do than force us to?"

"What could possibly make us do that?"

"Escape room" Daichi beamed, "Remember how much fun we had the first time we went with Kiyoko and Asahi?"

Suga smiled as he remembered the fun night the third years shared a few months prior, "Is there any good ones around here though?"

Daichi shook his head, "It's the Blue Puppet or nothing."

Suga furrowed his eyebrows. The Blue Puppet was in Tokyo and although it was the most quizzical and fun escape room Suga has ever been too, he wasn't sure how they would get everyone down there.

"Is it really worth such a drive? Why don't we just... I don't know, do some team building exercise in the gym like trust falls or something?”

"Oh c'mon you loved the Blue Puppet. Don't you remember how many rooms there were to try? There was even that one with the little safe you liked." Daichi leaned into his side playfully, trying to win him over with his teasing.

Suga backed up slightly, "Fine, fine. But seriously, how are we going to get everyone there?"

"Don't worry," Daichi put his hand up, "My parents are on a trip and I got two vacant cars on my driveway."

"So, you're saying we're gonna be the designated drivers?"

"Yes, sir."

Suga rolled his eyes, "Do you know how much gas money that's gonna cost?"

"It'll be fine, Suga, come on. Listen, we'll leave right after we can get home to change. It'll take us a while to get there so we can have a late dinner, on me by the way, and then we can get to the Blue Puppet nice and late so it'll be empty and we won't have any distractions."

Suga stared at him blankly, "And leave Tokyo in the middle of the night?"

Daichi paused, unsure of what to say as he hadn't thought of that part yet, "We can ask Kenma when we get there if we can crash at his place."

Suga sighed, looking down at the floor and pondering. Daichi had a point, the team really needed something, especially something so spontaneous. Kenma worked the Blue Puppet's front desk on the weekends and he most likely would have no problem allowing the team to crash at his place after his shift.

He looked back up at him, "Fine."

"Yay," Daichi smiled, punching Suga's arm gently, "Trust me. Once we can work together as a team again, we'll be unstoppable."

Suga rubbed his arm where Daichi hit him, "I guess you're right."

"Can't kill us to do something a little adventurous sometimes, you old man."

"But it can certainly cause trouble."

Daichi shook his head, "You got it all mixed up in your pretty head," Suga hid his blushed face from that one, "If it doesn't kill us it can only make us stronger."


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They had found something. As a team, together, with observation, they had been able to make one thing lead to another. 

Getting everyone to Tokyo in terms of distance and resources was the least of Daichi’s and Suga’s issues on that Friday evening. What was more of a challenge for them was the physical aspect of convincing them to get in the car and go at all.

It was clear just by expression alone that everyone was miserable, aside from an eager Daichi, a casual Suga, and an Asahi that as usual, was really happy to be there at all. 

When they arrived at the small Tokyo restaurant, it had already been around nine o’clock and the stomachs left empty due to an anticipated store bought meal did little to ease the frustrations in each young player.

“Fucking starving,” Tanaka grumbled out, Nishinoya walking at his side offering him a mirrored grumble in response.

Everyone walked on ahead toward the restaurant doors, awkwardly trodding after their third-year leaders. It always appeared like this. Like even in anger, even in the worst times of the day, hour, or minute, there was a dynamic. A dynamic with glue holding everyone together no matter how badly they wanted to separate. That glue being the elder boys, preparing to start a new chapter of their lives in the coming months, potentially drying out the said glue and leaving all of the links to hang astray. 

Tsukishima trailed off slightly further behind, Yamaguchi staying close to his side as they walked.

“Feeling a little better?”

Tsukishima pushed his glasses up his nose, “Didn't feel any way that would require ‘feeling better’ in the first place.”

“Fair,” Yamaguchi smiled. He envied the aloof energy Tsukishima carried with him through everything. The brawl that occurred earlier that day, no matter how small it may have been, would have left Yamaguchi in a fit of worry, wondering who was upset him, or what he could possibly do to stop being upset with himself.

The thought alone made Yamaguchi feel tense. His shoulders hunched up slightly, a habit in which he himself didn’t notice, but Tsukishima always did although he never verbally acknowledged it. 

A hand brushed against his. Yamaguchi looked up to see Tsukishima’s eyes staring back down at him. He offered him a small nod and Yamaguchi took a breath. His shoulders dropped back to their rested stance.

Upon sitting down on the floor surrounding the large table, Daichi took charge of the menu. 

His finger pointed and prodded at the sheet before him as the waitress nodded and wrote down the words they displayed. 

“Hm,” Daichi mumbled, “Here! This one too!’

She nodded again, “Would that be separate bills?”

“Oh no. Just one, thank you.”

“Damn,” Tanaka spoke, for the time that day in a tone that wasn’t painfully condescending, “Big baller.”

Daichi shrugged and put his arms up, “Ah, well, you know me.” He placed his arms behind his head as if he were getting ready to sunbathe and Suga rolled his eyes at him.

“You made me pay you back for the forty-five cent popsicle at the market the other day.”

Daichi sent a playful glare in Suga’s direction, “If you had earned it I would have given it to you for free.”

Hinata’s voice was slightly quiet when he finally spoke up, out of character for him in any setting, “Did we really do anything to earn this?’

Daichi looked over in his direction. There was a hint of sadness in his eyes when he did so. Daichi wouldn’t be around at Karasuno much longer to see that blazing head with its equally blazing eyes looking up at him dying for an answer. To Hinata, Daichi held them all. What would he do when Daichi was no longer there? The sadness left his eyes when he came to the short realization. _Easy._ He would become the one with all the answers, and a new eccentric and eager first year would come to him with all of the questions.

“Of course you did!” He slapped Hinata on the back, causing a jump in the small boy, “You guys worked hard and it was a rough day. We’re gonna have some fun.”

“What is this place we’re going to anyway?” Kageyama finally asked. He too seemed to hold some quietness to his voice. One that was plagued with a hint of guilt and remorse for the day's escapades.

Asahi smiled, “Blue Puppet.”

“Ah, Blue Puppet,” Suga sighed out, taking a sip from the water placed before him. He took the sip with the thoughts of the million ways the night could go wrong with numerous more fights breaking out, and he wished with earnest in that very moment that it was alcohol he was sipping. 

“Nice, guys, very explanatory,” Tsukishima murmured. His tone was indifferent, but he too harbored an interest and curiosity to where it was they would be visiting. 

“It’s an escape room place, and all the rooms are different. You know, different themes and stuff.”

They all nodded as they observed Suga, “The objective of every room is obviously to get out. But, to get out you need to find the blue puppet.”

Yamaguchi tilted his head, “What’s the blue puppet?” The slight concern in his voice didn’t go unnoticed. Small and obscure things that held deep and intense meanings always frightened Yamaguchi, but in the end, he still felt he gravitated toward them. Was made excited by them even. At the end of the day, it was Tsukki he spent all of his conscious, and sometimes even unconscious moments with.

Daichi shrugged, “It’s just a blue puppet.”

“What do you mean?” Tanaka’s face was scrunched in confusion. 

Suga offered him a shrug, “It’s just a cute little blue puppet. It’s got the face of a bear and the body’s just a little blue sheet you stick your hand in.”

“Boom,” Daichi offered, “Puppet.”

Yamaguchi still wasn’t convinced, “But… why?”

“Why a blue puppet?”

“Yeah?”

Suga shrugged again, “Why are some chocolate chip cookies made with more chips than others?”

Yamaguchi paused, “…I don’t know?”

“Just ‘cause.”

Kageyama was now intrigued, “So, it just doesn’t mean anything?”

Asahi shook his head with a smile, “Nope.”

“Kind of lame,” Tanaka said as he stared down at his plate. From the spot next to him, Asahi could hear his stomach's faint grumbling.

“Kind of,” Suga traced the rim of his water glass with his finger, “But you have no idea, once you’re in there you want to find that blue puppet so fucking bad.”

The table was silent for a moment, but the silence wasn’t the tension-filled, ear-ringing one. It was one of acknowledgment and observation, something Karasuno hasn’t been able to master in the last few weeks.

In unison, they all burst into a fit of laughter over the ridiculous thought of such an obscure yet simple little blue puppet.

As they finally ate, the spirits of the room lifted up even further.

Tanaka shoveled food into his mouth and shamelessly spoke in a muffled voice, “Can’t wait to see this stupid blue puppet, man.”

Nishinoya, whose contagious smile had been gone from his face for the first half of the day, found it again and smiled back at him, elbowing his side, “Me too.”

A slight smile peppered onto Hinata’s face, “And I actually can’t wait to see Kenma.” From the moment Hinata had been informed that his quiet friend would be even in the most discreet way present in that night’s events, he had been happy. The lingering tense tone before then was still present, but at that moment, light flashed over his face. Light that only those who paid intensely close attention would notice. The only one not blind to the bright flashes of Hinata’s expressions was Kageyama.

Daichi looked over at Suga and smiled, sending him what he would consider a telepathic message saying, _See? I told you it would work._

Spirits were lifted after stomachs were made full and throats were turned from dry to slick. The group walked into the Blue Puppet just after midnight like they were made to be there. No awkwardly holding the door open or anxiously making others walk ahead. Everyone waltzed in comfortably, especially Hinata who buzzed to greet Kenma.

The slightest quirk of a smile popped onto Kenma’s face, “Hey.”

“I’m so happy to see you!” Kageyama fought to keep his eyes away from the inevitable glow of excitement. No one else seemed to be experiencing the same effect. 

Kenma greeted everyone from the spot behind his desk, bowing his head slightly and his mutters of ‘hellos’ being soft and gentle.

He nodded toward Suga, Daichi, and Asahi, ushering them a sign of ‘go’, “The room’s prepared, you guys know the drill.”

“Oh, c’mon,” Suga whined playfully, “Give the kids the full experience."

Kenma let out a sigh that read of _seriously?_ , but all he got in response was a nod from Daichi as he too pressed for him to explain the rules of the escape rooms. He feels the excitement linger throughout him. The one that he held in his chest when he first entered the building alongside his three other friends. The one that mixed with a tinge of anxiety and wonderment of what was to come. Daichi wondered if his younger teammates felt that same way. He hoped that they did. 

“Fine,” he started, “First parts pretty straight forward, rooms got a theme, couple things will pop up on the screen, you listen, gather clues, do your thing.”

Hinata nodded eagerly by him, “What’s the theme?”

“It was requested that you guys do the rescue mission. Whole storyline about some kidnapped little girl, you’ll learn the gist once you get in. Once you get your hands on the little blue thing, you win.”

“And,” Saga’s voice dragged out, “Tell them the best part,” he reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone, ushering it in Kenma’s view for him to understand what he was referencing. Kenma knew well enough. 

“Yup, no phones. I got a little phone bucket here,” Kenma reached under the desk and pulled out a plastic white tub. It was shallow and plain like the ones seen in an airport security line, waiting to be filled with shoes, carry-on luggage, and electronics. 

“What?” Tanaka grumbled but still reached into his pocket nonetheless. 

“Uh-huh,” he prodded the tub out and ushered for them to place them inside, “Make sure they’re off. I don’t wanna hear any silly ringtones while I’m back here.”

The group was left in the room, Kenma locking the door behind him. Like the first time, Asahi’s throat tightened slightly at the click of the door’s lock. He’s trapped. 

Suga seemed to take notice and moved a gentle hand to his arm, “Let’s figure out what we gotta do, big guy.” The notion always caught Asahi off guard and made him smile and cringe. He hated being called that. It was flung around like taunt. He’d walk into matches or games and people around would whisper, and he would cower away. He couldn’t fight the way he looked, and it pained him, but to hear Sugawara say it felt different. It felt light, airy, playful even. The slightest bit of flirtation is found in his tone if observed closely. Asahi could never cower away if it was Suga saying it. Between them, it became a term of endearment.

The room was not very spacious, and the avid use of props and decoration did much to add to the stuffy feeling it held. It was merely a square, filled with a fancy carpet, ferns in various corners, stray placed chairs, a table resembling a kitchen island in its center, a flat-screen television perched on the left wall, and to the right, a closed safe.

“Where do we start?” Kageyama asked, eyeing the space around him. Daichi was pleased to see him eager to begin, even if it was just a tiny spark.

As if in response to his voice, the television on the left wall perked up into life. The room succumbed to a flash of fluorescent blue as a photographed blue puppet appeared on the screen, black writing beneath it displaying a cryptic and pressing dialogue.

**Little Sheryl Lee has been missing for two weeks. Her family has received no leads and are growing desperate. Little do they know, little Sheryl Lee’s life is running short, but with your help, she can exceed her numbered days and return home with her family.**

“Little creepy,” Noya whispered to Tanaka who shoved him back slightly, eyes burning onto the screen.

**Her captives have left a letter. Check the table and read its contents.**

Daichi made his way over to the island-style table and his team surrounded him while he opened the envelope left sealed in place. Their eyes were filled with wonder and curiosity.

“The water goes but the sun doesn’t shine,” Daichi squinted his eyes slightly as he repeated the words a second time for his teammates to hear.

They all appeared lost in thought, eyes wandering the room. Daichi turned to face them and watched in some earnest. This was just what he wanted to see. Everyone’s minds being quizzed in a team-like manner. No sense of competitiveness found, only the desire to follow the guidelines given and solve the kidnapping of a non-existing child they probably would not have cared much for had she been a real-life case. 

He had to shake his head and get into the groove of focus himself. If he didn’t, he would be a walking contradiction. He had to play the game too, he had to be a team player. That was the whole point.

Yamaguchi tapped on his chin in thought, “Water goes there, but the sun doesn’t shine there,” he parroted, “Like the plants, maybe?”

Daichi nodded, “You’re right Yamaguchi, that makes a lot of sense.”

“But don’t plants need the sun?” Kageyama remarked, tilting his head. His question had no ill-intention. It was genuine, curious, and not at all mocking in the way almost all of his responses were, especially those aimed at his fellow first-years.

“They do,” Tsukishima added, his tone avoided the usual cutting edge it holds, only simple response trickled from his vocal cords, “But in the end, water seeps throughout the whole thing, but the sun doesn’t directly shine within the whole thing.”

“It does seep though,” Tanaka added.

Tsukishima nodded, “It does, but it doesn’t exactly shine, per se.”

Hinata scrunched his nose in thought, “What part?”

“The bottom,” Tsukishima stretched his long arm out to point at the pot that held the large fern in the corner of the room, “Like the bottom of the pot.”

Suga hit his back gently, “Nice going.” Tsukki smiled awkwardly, pushing his glasses up his nose from the light impact of the lurch.

“But there’s so many of them,” Nishinoya observed as he looked to every corner of the room. Almost each one held a fern.

“We can’t just dig into each one….right?” Tanaka’s tone almost pushed the idea that maybe he sort of wanted to.

“No, there has to be some strategy,” Daichi looked at each of them, they all appeared to be relatively similar in size, except for, _boom._ _That was the one._ To the far right corner, the smallest fern sat, it’s pot significantly smaller than the rest, making it stick out poignantly amongst its peers. Daichi kept it to himself for a moment, allowing the others to catch on to the idea. He snickered to himself quietly when he realized the lone minuscule fern reminded him of Nishinoya and Hinata. 

“Oh,” Yamaguchi’s ears perked up, “This one is different in size.”

The group turned in unison until their eyes met that of the small potted plant.

“Bingo!” Suga called, “That has to be the one. Who would like to do the honors?”

“Tsukishima, why don’t you do it? Since you came up with the original answer,” Daichi encouraged.

“Uh, sure. I can do that.”

There were no protests. No whines. No hushed petty whispers or condescending giggles. Instead, they all watched in anticipation as Tsukki made his way over to the fern.

“Do I really gotta?-“ As he spoke he dug his hand into the soil, pleased to find that it was only set up and not real dirt that would be caught under his fingernails for days. He nodded, neglecting to finish his sentence. 

His hand fought its way into the bottom of the pot, where it hit a soft clothed object.

“Got anything?” Suga asked from behind him.

“Yup,” Tsukishima pulled out a small red velvet baggie. One that’s shape gave the appearance of a card laying in its contents. The bag protruded at the corners in star edges, confirming that said appearance to those that looked on.

A slow yet appearing smile broke out onto all of their faces. They had found something. As a team, together, with observation, they had been able to make one thing lead to another. 

Daichi put his hand on Tsukishima’s shoulder and he smiled brightly as he peered down at the baggie. Everyone followed suit behind, staring on in a silent surprise no one would acknowledge. The fact that the team was able to work as a team should not have been applauded, they knew that, but oh how they burned with pride on the inside for an act so simple and expected.

Daichi giggled, “Good job gu-“

His voice was cut off by the screeching sound of static on the television. The blue light that had been fluorescing out onto the room’s walls leaving for a second, engulfing the glow into black, before turning back to its usual puppet blue.

They all stared in wonder, expecting a new dialogue with a new clue. A new ticket to make their team become even more of a team. To make up for the things they had lacked those last few weeks. 

A pitch altered voice croaked to life through the speakers of the television.

“Hello, Karasuno. Welcome.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An update the same week as the first post! Got a little too excited and couldn't wait.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hello, Karasuno. Welcome.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, things are gonna be picking up from here on out so remember to check any trigger warnings I'll be providing before the chapter begins. Also, I just really want to remind everyone how important it is to be supporting the Black Lives Matter movement and to help in as many ways possible to do your part and contribute to the justice for the innocent lives that have been lost.   
> I ask everyone to please, please, sign this petition and share it with those you know. Let's never forget the names of those who have past from police brutality and try to bring a change. Please copy and paste this link:  
> https://www.change.org/p/mayor-jacob-frey-justice-for-george-floyd?recruiter=868615937&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=sms&utm_campaign=psf_combo_share_abi&recruited_by_id=79ba8e30-3bec-11e8-a679-d1914ae2ae0b  
> Thank you all so much. Stay well.

_“Hello, Karasuno. Welcome.”_

If they weren’t already before, all eyes fixed carefully onto the television screen, caught off guard by the sudden morphed voice.

The sound was quite ridiculous. The moment Nishinoya’s ears perked up to it, he had thought of the first time he had watched Death Note as a kid and was startled by the distorted voice L used to communicate with Kira.

The voice came to life once again after a couple passing moments of tense silence, “I see you have all been doing well.”

A nervous laugh came out of Suga’s mouth, which triggered a domino effect of faint chuckles and small hiccups of laughter from all corners of the room. The effect was common with the team, especially when it came to their vice-captain. His energy transcended from boy to boy, allowing them to step into the built-up fairytale world Suga manifested for them to have.

“Did Kozume set this up?” Tanaka spoke quietly and rather unusually for his known self. He was taken aback, but not frightened. Tanaka likes to say that he is never frightened, only ever taken by surprise, but his tone could always give away otherwise. His only received response was a gentle elbow to the side from Noya, ushering him to keep quiet.

“I am able to see and hear you,” the voice crackled, “So feel free to speak and say whatever it is that you like.”

The team shared a unanimous squint as they looked around at each other. They all took up smiles on their faces, ones that onlookers would find embarrassing to look at. Each smile was tense and read of one simple thing, fear. The normalized human reaction to the tense situation was to make light of it, smile, laugh. It was a common thing amongst anyone, let alone the teenage boys occupying the room. Even in times when viewing horror films together, the constant untimely joke being cracked and the sound effects made to filter out the underlying fear stayed present.

Kageyama shook his head, a scoff firing its way from the back of his throat marking his first cutting knick after an otherwise successful evening.

“He’s fucking with us.”

As if in a response to Kaegyama’s harsh tone, the flash of blue from the puppet’s coloring left from the screen, leaving them momentarily in the reflection of the screen’s pure black.

The image showed them all stood still, frozen amongst each other. It passed for seconds as they stared into their faceless reflections, wondering what had happened.

Daichi turned to them all with a breathy laugh, “God, Kenma right?”

Hinata let out a giggle, “He’s just weird like that. He probably got bored of a game he was playing and decided to come mess with us.”

Yamaguchi hadn’t realized it before, but his shoulders had been tensed, and it wasn’t until they rested back into place that he realized he had been holding his breath too. As discreetly as he felt he could, he put a hand to his chest to ease the tension that was surfacing.

“I didn’t really like that.”

Sugawara frowned, “Oh, Yamaguchi, I’m sure he’s all done now. He got bored of us already, it’s okay. Let’s just keep playing, yeah?”

Tsukishima scoffed from his spot just behind Yamaguchi, “He’s stupid.” The comment was stark and slightly heated as he muttered it under his breath.

Hinata squinted at him, “What do you have against Kenma? You’re so weird when it comes to him.” If there was anyone outside of Karasuno that Hinata adored spending time with, it was Kenma. Although Hinata’s judgment may not be the best revolving around people, it was rather obvious that Kenma could be likable to anyone. He was quiet, polite, and had not one single irritating or over-bearing bone in his body. So whenever he noticed Tsukishima’s jaw clench at the sound of his name, or his cheeks turn a strange shade of pink upon the view of his face, Hinata can’t help but question him.

Tanaka rolled his eyes, “He has something against everyone, Hinata. No need to jump to his defence.”

Hinata crossed his arms, “Fine.” Tsukishima let out a tsk with his tongue at him, daring him to try him in any way again.

Daichi shook his head. There was the night already heading South, thanks to whatever it was Kenma thought he was doing out there at that moment.

“Okay,” he put his hands up, “No need to get all worked up guys, let’s just keep going. We were on a roll there.”

Asahi was relieved at that moment. Opposite to Yamaguchi, Asahi knew the tensing of his broad shoulders was there. He knew when his breath was being held to the point of a red face and he knew when his heart was beating out of his chest. Most importantly, he knew he was scared, and unlike anyone else around him, if it had to come down to it, he wasn’t afraid to admit it.

Suga chimed in on Daichi’s defence in agreement, “Yeah, let’s keep going. We can’t stay in here all night cause then Kenma will really start fucking with u-“

The television came back to life once again, the absence of the blue puppet photo or the reflection of the boys’ pitiful stances painfully noticeable as they are greeted with a new sight when they all turned their attention to the screen.

Kenma’s face was drenched with tears and his eyes were screwed shut in a mixture of fear and frustration. To his right, a gun attached to the arm of an out-of-frame person was placed against his temple.

Suga’s eyes widened, “Kenma.”

As if it could possibly do anything, Karasuno stepped forward toward the television, even Tsukishima who, just a moment previously, was growing impatient with his entire existence. Sugawara’s arms reached out but to no avail. He was out of reach, there was nothing he could do.

“I’m sorry,” Kenma choked out, shaking his head and flinching as he felt the gun’s barrel against his temple. His voice came out in hiccups as he forced himself to speak, “They’re making me leave. I’m sorry.”

The gloved hand holding the gun appeared to push itself harshly in the direction of Kenma’s head, ushering him a signal of _get up_ that was silent aside from the click from the gun’s contact.

“Woah, woah, Kenma,” Daichi called out as he watched him rise from the chair.

Hinata pushed his way through the small huddle the group made around the TV as if he was a newscaster arriving at the scene of a frightening public crime and Kenma was a victim ready to be interviewed.

“Kenma!”

The screen flashed back to black, but only gave the boys a second to view their silhouettes in the blackness before the blue bear made its reappearance.

“Ta-da,” the distorted voice was sickeningly playful, “Not Kozume Kenma.”

The room stood in stunned silence. Aside from the crackling of the speaker the anonymous voice floated through, none of the boys moved a muscle, or said a word. Not even their breaths could be heard as they all held their chests in tightly in fear and surprise.

“Well, it looks like we’re alone now, Karasuno.”

A shaky breath came from Asahi as he tried to regain some of his non-existent composure. His anxiety toward being locked in the room was an issue to begin with and had been the first time he and his friends visited the escape rooms in Tokyo. Now, the anxiety heightened as it appeared that there was no more fun or games to be found in the room.

“I think we’re alone now.”

The crackle of the voice sent shivers down Yamaguchi’s spine as his shoulders tensed once again. Now, he could feel it. Now, it was unavoidable.

No one found it in them to say a word.

“Looks like it’s time to layout the new ground rules, hm?” The distorted voice trailed out in a manner that made it clear that whoever it was, they were wearing a smirk on their face behind the innocent-looking bear’s photo.

“Let me start with the basics,” the room remained still, frozen as they listened to what the voice had to say, “There is no one else here, Karasuno. All it is, is me, you, and…” they paused as if to leave the boys dangling on a thread. Their bodies shifted forward in anticipation.

“A bomb.”

If they were silent before, they were silent no more. Tanaka threw his arms over his head and a harsh huff blew from his mouth. Nishinoya lurched forward to grab hold of Asahi, who was in no position himself to comfort anyone as the once held in sobs quietly croaked from the lowest point of his throat.

Hinata’s voice came out as a quiver, “What? What do they mean? A bomb? There’s a bomb?”

Before Daichi could move forward to respond to him in any sort of way, the voice cackled, “Yes. A bomb. Why don’t you take a look under the table?”

Nobody moved, but it wasn't a request.

Daichi eyed them with a determined stare and with an ushering of his hand telling them he would handle it, he crouched down with one palm on the center table’s top and peered under it.

Strapped by mounds of grey duct tape, a black box clung to the table’s bottom. Daichi swallowed a strangling lump in his throat as he shakily rose back to his feet. He had never seen a bomb in person, but it did not take much to comprehend the fact that he had just come face to face with one.

He turned to the boys and nodded, eyes closing as he fought back a nerve-infused trickle of tears.

Yamaguchi shuddered, a soft sound of pain passing through his lips. Tsukishima tensed up from behind him, feeling the need to move forward and comfort him, but also feeling like the timing was far too wrong and that he himself needed comforting that he was too prideful to reach out for.

The voice sounded satisfied, “Now that you know, I must tell you all that I know everything about every last one of you. There is not one single person in this room I am unfamiliar with.”

Sugawara looked around the room at each of his teammates. He tried to fight back the shaking of his hands, but even with the use of all the power in him, he still felt the cold chill surround them. He wished more than anything at that moment that Kiyoko could have been there to make them warm again, to make them stop shaking out of his control. Nothing was worse than when Suga found himself not in control.

“So,” the voice continued, “Given that fact, I’m gonna have some fun with you guys.”

Asahi shoved the palms of his hands against his closed eyelids as he attempted to stop the tears from continuing.

“You will all do as I tell you. Meaning, if I give you a question, you answer it. If I give you an instruction, you follow it. If I wish for you to say something, you will say it.”

Tsukishima’s eyes squeezed shut behind his glasses.

“And if you don’t comply, I got my finger on a button and I will set that thing off without any hesitation.”

Hinata choked out a gasp, his hand rushing up to his chest where his heart smashed through his ribs.

“It’s bullshit,” Kageyama shook his head, “It’s bullshit, guys.”

“Is it bullshit, Kageyama Tobio?” All the frantic heads turned back to the screen at the mention of Kaegeyama’s name. The knowing of their school name was one thing, but the panic in each boy’s face came all the more real at the sound of both a given and family name.

“How about you, captain? Do you think it’s bullshit, Sawamura Daichi?”

“Sugawara Koushi?”

“Azumane Asahi?”

“Nishinoya Yu?”

“Tanaka Ryunosuke?”

“Hinata Shoyo?”

“Tsukishima Kei?”

“Yamaguchi Tadashi?”

The room stayed still. Silent. No one dared to respond to the devious voice.

“That’s what I thought.”

Sugawara looked down at the floor, the vision of the blue puppet now becoming nauseating. He wanted to be gone from the room and the cast of blue the screen set. He wanted to be home, he wanted to be practicing, hell, he would take studying over being in the stupid Blue Puppet escape room that he had wanted to try oh so badly.

“I see you are missing some of your teammates. Yeah, I know them too. Ennoshita Chikara, Kinoshita Hisashi, Narita Kazuhito. Classic Karasuno to exclude their own.”

Daichi’s flist clenched into his palm as he fought back a swinging hit to the television screen. Defence bubbled within him at the mention of his absent team members who decided that they were better off staying in and studying for the night instead of joining them in Tokyo (a decision he now felt was the best one they could have possibly made). To have their name muttered without them present and to have his loyalty to them questioned had his blood boiling.

“How about we start playing our new little game?”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “How about we start playing our new little game?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I hope you're all doing well. Not very many troubling themes in this chapter, although it is quite heavy so please be weary of that. Once again, I ask you all to copy and paste this link!  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bCgLa25fDHM&feature=youtu.be  
> This will allow you to donate to the BLM movement without the use of money. Thank you all! Enjoy<3

_“How about we start playing our new little game?”_

“What the fuck,” Tanaka snapped out as he turned his back from the screen. He wished that was enough. He wished more than anything that turning around and shielding his eyes from the screen would allow for him to escape the mess he found himself in, but it was no use. The blue light still reflected off the walls of the dim room, leaving him sick as he basked in it, the blue now resembling a sort of sickening green in his weary eyes.

Noya reached forward and grabbed a fist full of his shirt in his hand, “Don’t lose it on me right now, Ryu.” Tanaka turned around to look at him, a narrow expression inhabiting his face. “Get a fucking grip.”

“Relax,” Daichi stepped forward and pulled Nishinoya back gently, “Just relax for a second.”

“Relax?” Tsukishima snapped as he stepped around from his spot behind Tadashi, “Why should we fucking be relaxing right now?”

Daichi’s eyes narrowed, “Tsukishima, shut up.” The authority he held in his face made the sharp statement less sharp than it would have been had any of the other boys said it. Daichi’s stern authoritative voice was one that Tsukishima was used to, and despite his snark personality, he would never dare talk back to Daichi.

The screen stayed still and silent on the blue puppet’s image, its lifeless eyes seeming to simply observe the group as they went through their panic. 

Hinata found himself unable to keep his small fuse of cool much longer, and no matter how strongly his body protested, he began to cower himself in the room’s nearest corner. It was a simple and normal reaction, but Hinata held a whole lot of pride in his tiny body. Pride that sometimes grew so tall and strong that it ripped from him, leaving him alone in his tender shell, ready to flinch away and hide from anything that frightened him. 

His shaking hands found their way over his mouth, his eyes, his head. They raced up his upper body uncontrollably as if they were trying to engulf him whole and hide him away from the events before him.

“I-I can’t,” he stuttered out through shaking breaths, “I can’t. I can’t do this stuff.”

All eyes turned to the boy as he curled in upon himself, slouching so far into the corner that he appeared as a prop in the room. 

The bright and enthusiastic boy they once knew seemed to be taking a temporary vacation for the night. Wherever he was, it must have been sunny and warm and filled with delicious foods and endless games of beach volleyball, because the boy before them was so far from the one they saw every morning, and every lunch hour, and every night.

His breathing appeared more labored as tears stung his eyes, “A bomb? A-are you serious a fucking bomb? No, no this is crazy, this i-“

“Hinata.”

Sugawara stepped forward into the small bubble created around Hinata no one dared to touch. Suga was the only one that ever had the nerve to push the boundaries when he saw them. Whether it has been during a game, or during a practice match, there were areas that the others were too afraid to invade. When Tsukishima was in a bad mood, everyone would keep their distance. When Tanaka wasn’t playing in the standards that he had created for himself, everyone would walk on eggshells around him. When Kageyama found himself in a high-and-mighty rut, everyone lingered around in fear. Everyone but Suga. Suga did not fear any of them, and he was the only one that could break the said bubble when it was built up.

“Hinata,” he spoke again, only this time more softly as he moved forward and gently removed Hinata’s hands from his face, “It’s okay, I’m here. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“Oh,” the distorted voice behind the speaker cackled, the interruption sounding more like a socking laugh than a word, “Well, would you look at that?”

Sugawara kept Hinata’s hands in his as he turned to look at the screen. In an act of protectiveness and instinct, he stood in front of him, shielding him from the sharp wave of blue.

If it wasn’t a fact before, the person behind the speaker was certainly smirking now as they spoke again.

“Oh, Sugawara Koushi, you.”

Daichi felt in his bones that he wanted to lurch forward, to grab Sugawara out of the gunfire, to hide him behind his back and sneak him out of the battleground when no one was looking. But there was no gunfire. There was no battleground. Really, there never was, but Daichi always found a way to protect Suga in ways he didn’t for anybody else. Only this time, he was helpless. How could he protect the boy from a screen and a condescending puppet?

If the voice wasn’t being morphed through its strange alteration machine or whatever it was the person was using to make it come out in such a way, Suga imagined the person had a smooth voice that sing-songed atop every vowel.

“Suga, aren’t you just a nice tall glass of water to drink on a hot day? Even in times like this, you aren’t losing your cool.”

From behind him, Hinata stood, but still clung onto his shirt, eyes clenched tightly in fear. Asahi silently pitied him from where he stood across the room.

“I look at you and I see an angel. Anyone would, right boys?” The voice snickered.

Suga’s eyes darted around the room anxiously, but they never once dared to land on anyone before they found themselves back on the screen. 

“So perfect and beautiful and trusting. Oh, what a dream you are. If only they knew you were deceiving them all.”

Asahi’s eyes moved from Hinata to Suga as he watched his face fall slightly from its strong-willed stance. Whatever it was this person was doing or trying to do, it was slowly breaking Suga apart, and it was hard for anyone to miss, even Asahi who could never imagine Suga as anything but perfect.

The voice seemed to giggle as it began to sing out, _“You’re the devil in disguise.”_

Suga lurched forward in a swift yet forceful manner, yanking Hinata who was still clung to him as if his whole life banked on it away, and realistically at that moment, it did. Whatever Suga chose to do or say determined the fates of every last person in that room including his own.

“You are just a beautiful liar, aren’t you? With your perfect little strong get up that never gets angry or frustrated or tired. Do you hear me, boys? It’s all a lie! He’s lying to you!”

Suga couldn’t fight back the snap that broke from his throat, “You fucking take that back!”

“I won’t take back the truth,” the voice sounded painfully pleased, “How about we start with you and your _closeted_ hostility.”

Two words in that sentence made Suga cringe. He shut his eyes as he stepped back slightly, unable to fight the waves of sound that were to come from the speaker.

“Hey, everybody! Guess what? Sugawara is so over being second to Kageyama!”

Suga’s eyes widened as he took a swift step toward the screen, staring into the eyes of the blue puppet as if it were the eyes of the one that was testing him.

“Shut up,” he spat.

“Everyone! Everybody!” The voice was so smooth in its speech it almost sounded as if it were cooing at a child, and in a way, it most certainly was. “Sugawara Koushi is so angry that he is not apart of his rightfully earned starting line up that he even writes about it!”

Suga froze and his mind wondered. He had kept a small journal toward the start of his third-year and used it on days when he felt he had no one to talk to. He chewed his inner cheek in frustration as his brain tried to relay all of the angry things he would write. He figured no one would ever see it, so why worry? He had misplaced the book and hadn’t seen it since a game earlier in the year, but he had shrugged off and figured it had gotten tossed in the trash after being dropped on the floor, never thinking much more about it as all he wrote became foggy after coming down from his anger ridden ranting. 

“I have it right here, gentlemen. Anyone care for a listen? Ah, what the fuck, I’m gonna read it anyway.”

Kageyama gulped from where he stood, skittishly awaiting the words that Suga kept hidden underneath.

The voice mocked a cough as if to clear its throat.

“I have spent the last 3 years working my ass for this school. I’ve put actual school work aside and worked to help out some team only for some spoiled greedy first year to come along and take my spot.”

Sugawara turned to Kageyama, his eyes pleading in silent apology. Kageyama couldn’t find it in him to meet his eyes. Partly because he was hurt, partly because he knew that every word said was true.

The voice continued, “He is selfish and rather rude, yet everyone seems to think he’s a better fit than I am.”

Daichi shook his head with a frown, everyone else staring wide-eyed and standing their ground in a still awkwardness, “Nobody thinks that, Suga.”

“I tell everyone that I don’t mind, that I understand, that it’s for the team, but it isn’t. As a matter of fact, it is never okay when I say it’s okay,-Oh Suga sweet angel boy, what a liar you are!- I should just stop caring. Why waste my energy? At the end of the day, I’m only apart of this club to-“ the voice cut itself off to interject once again, only this time with a gasp, “Oh, you guys are gonna wanna listen good for this one.”

Sugawara’s memory had refreshed as the voice relayed the words to him, reminding him of the very day he wrote them. He had gotten home after an intensely boring practice as they were preparing for a game and Suga was left on the bench for the entire duration of the time. He went home pissed and _oh- what he wrote next._

Panic set into his voice, “Please, please don’t.”

Asahi pushed a shaky hand to his, but in his frenzy, Suga rejected it, shoving it back with a hand equally as stuttering. The response caught Asahi off guard and he pressed his hand to his chest, backing up slightly. Noya moved forward and pulled his hand down, entangling it in his own. He nodded up at him, telling him _it’s okay, he’s not upset at you._

The voice laughed, “At the end of the day, I’m only apart of this club to be closer to Daichi.”

The ice was broken. Suga closed his eyes and hung his head low, preparing for the slings of humiliation coming his way. Daichi’s head swung from the screen and back to him, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. 

“I only joined 'cause he did and it means more time to get to see him. I hate that I like him so much. I can never seem to think about anybody else no matter how hard I try. I can never tell whether or not he likes me, it kind of hurts.” The voice laughed in an antagonizing pity, gawking at how sad it was to read the tales Suga never dared to tell. 

Tanaka’s eyes widened, he had no idea in his mind that Sugawara was potentially attracted to his captain. He sort of had an idea that Suga was into guys, but he never once thought it would be Daichi. It all seemed to hit too close to home. Asahi shared the shock, only his had a hint of hurt from the fact that Suga would hide such a thing from him. 

Hinata leaned over to where Yamaguchi now stood next to him, his voice small and timid, “Suga likes Daichi?” Yamaguchi didn’t answer, a state of questions of his own occupying his head. Tsukki gave him a poorly timed knowing nod. _Told you so._

“Suga,” Daichi murmured stepping forward. He placed a hand on his arm, “Suga, I’m sorry.”

“Oh, please,” the voice interrupted Daichi’s gesture, “You knew exactly what you were doing, playboy.”

The anger Daichi worked hard to suppress surfaced. He turned his body to the screen, eyes threatening the photo of the silly blue puppet and its teddy bear face, “What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Hey, Karasuno, get this. Your captain over here gets his kicks playing around with people’s feelings.”

Tanaka’s eyebrow was raised. If there was anything he had, it was ego, and he was not about to let it down, but buried beneath it all was such a strong admiration and idolization of his senior that the thought of him not being the great man he imagined hurt him.

Daichi was shaking his head, but the voice had no intention of stopping.

“There’s a reason Sugawara has even the slightest bit of faith in a possibility with you. You lead him on. Everyone sees you touch his back, or his hands, or his hair. And you know you’re doing it too.”

Suga kept his head pointed to the ground, feeling the tears threatening his eyes. His shame was no longer alone and discomfort joined in as the hard truth was relayed to him by the anonymous tyrant.

“Sorry to break it to you, angel. He doesn’t like you like that. You can even ask Michimiya Yui.”

He could no longer fight back the waterfall behind his eyes. The mere mention of her name sent the stinging liquid pooling out. He was always painfully jealous of her and the way she and Daichi just seemed so..simple. Deep down he knew that together, he and Daichi would be more of a problem. Questions arising, glaring glances. But still, he wanted nothing more but to try and thought that there was a possibility they could.

“It isn’t true,” Daichi’s voice was breaking now and it put everyone on edge, especially Hinata who needed nothing more than for his seniors to stay strong for him. “It’s a fucking lie, Suga.”

“Mhm,” the voice was pleased with the aggravation it pulled from Daichi’s core, “You’re not even real with her. You know you got a hold on people and you like to take advantage. You are no good, Sawamura.”

“Fuck you,” Daichi’s voice could have been venomous. It could have been cunning and pointed. He wished so badly that it was. But the rage inside him was too painful and he sounded like an adolescent bubbling fool going through puberty as his voice cracked through a dry throat.

The voice laughed, “I bet you would!”

He was an inch away from smashing the television screen when the small hiccups coming from his side made him step back. The tiny sobs escaping from Suga as his shoulders shook with every breath softened Daichi’s face and he moved toward him timidly. 

Nishinoya felt a strong protective instinct brew in his gut but he held himself back, focusing on distracting Asahi from the clear distress that riddled his face. He had to be realistic and being realistic meant accepting he could never really take on Daichi.

“I’m sorry, Suga,” he whispered gently, for only him to hear but the unfortunate size of the room allowed for it to hit off every corner.

“If you’re so sorry, why don’t you show him?”

Daichi looked back at the screen, fire in his eyes, “How?”

“Hm,” the voice trailed as if it were off in thought, but the sarcastic undertone was enough to have everyone believing it knew what it was going to say before it said it, “Boys, are you all watching?”

None of them responded, all frozen in no one even knew what at that point. The tension that the team felt earlier that day was one of anger, frustration, and just a feeling of being done with each other’s presence. This time, it was awkward, pitiful, and it held the hidden desire for them to be near each other, to be close and to protect each other, but the fear to even move muscle overpowered and won the battle.

“I can’t hear you~”

Sugawara's voice cracked as he turned to face the team behind him, eyes not leaving their spot on the ground, “C-c’mon guys. Just say yes.”

They all looked at each other, eyes wide and sad. Seeing Sugawara in such a vulnerable place was rather frightening. Hinata decided at that moment that it was time to stop putting people on such a high pedestal of perfection. For him, if Suga could face times of brokenness, there is not one person in the world who couldn’t.

Tsukishima put his large hand up for them all to see, placing up to three of his fingers. He nodded at everyone and they all gave him a nod back, watching as he put each finger down one by one. _One. Two. Three._

“Yes,” they spoke in unison. Even together they sounded quiet and disheartened, but they each knew that if they had to speak individually, their voices would come out in a mere whisper. 

“Perfect!” The voice sounded chipper. The fact that the voice’s expression was so distinctive despite the distortion was a fright in itself, “Let’s put on a show then! Kiss him, Sugawara.”

Suga’s head shot up to the screen, “W-what?”

“Kiss him. Show your team how you really feel.”

Something of a choke and a laugh left Suga’s mouth as he stared at the screen. He shook his head. _No. He couldn’t do that. It was humiliating._ Not only did he know now that Daichi couldn’t give a shit about him, but he didn’t want his team to see him do such a thing. His vulnerability was already forcefully bared to them, he did not need his pride and love life (or lack thereof) to be on the front line too.

“Suga,” Daichi’s voice took on its soothing tone, “It’s okay. C’mon, Koushi.”

The voice behind the speaker gasped, “Ooo, Sugawara he’s using your given name now. You better go write about that if you ever get out of here.”

The sound of that sentence made Asahi swallow a hard lump in his throat. That was the exact sound of everything he feared at that moment.

Daichi pulled Suga toward him gently by a hand on his upper arm. He could see Suga’s eyes grow even bigger and his chest heave as his breath began to hitch. He tried not to think about it, and more importantly he wanted Suga not to think about it. He hurt him enough already tonight, the least he could do was ensure that he wouldn’t get hurt physically either.

With one step forward, Daichi’s lips were against Suga’s, pressing gently. Suga’s hands stayed clenched at his sides. He had imagined kissing Daichi thousands of times. He had created scenarios in his head about how their first kiss would go. He thought of the change room after practice, the park during a walk home, the back of the school on their lunch break. He imagined his arms wrapping around Daichi’s neck, his hands roaming his back. He could feel Daichi’s arms hold his waist protectively, feel his hands snake through his hair.

But that is not what he got. Instead, they stood in the middle of the room, their entire team watching, Daichi’s hand stuck on Suga’s arm, the other down at his side in the same manner that Suga’s were. There was no built-up desire in the kiss. No relief in finally reaching that aspired feeling. There was a need, but there was not _need_. Daichi didn’t kiss him because he _needed_ him, because he _needed_ to kiss him because he made him happy and he loved him and he wanted to express his feelings. He kissed him because he needed to keep his team safe, he needed to do what he could to get them out of there.

Suga could feel that in the coldness of his lips. There was no warmth there. Much like Hinata, Suga made his own promise to himself. _Stop having such an active imagination. You will only be let down._

Once Daichi backed up, he gazed at Suga in apology. His eyes were filled with sorrow, but the voice clearly had different thoughts. 

“Bravo! Bravo! What a show!”

Tanaka had never thought he would have to experience such a thing. As a matter of fact, none of the boys did. It had nothing to do with the fact that they were boys, it had to do with the fact that they were their captains. The romantic display of affection is one they always kept to themselves, none of them ever even having seen the other kissing a girl before. Even Yamaguchi and Tsukishima who were known to be in a relationship had never shown one ounce of affection in front of the team. The awkward air couldn’t help but linger.

“Really! I’m impressed. You guys should go into film-making if you know what I mean!” Another prodding laugh filled the room, “Ah, hey, Kageyama! I bet you loved that one, kid.”

Kageyama’s eyes widened as he looked up the screen, eyes having broken to the floor the moment Suga and Daichi pulled apart. 

“Should I make them do it again for you? Would you like that?”

Tanaka took a protective step in front of Sugawara and he mumbled under his breath, close enough to the television for the voice to hear, “Think he’s had enough.”

“You’re right,” a funny-sounding distorted sigh was heard, “I’m not _that_ cruel.” A nasty giggle followed.

The boys all stood in the room, awkward silence succumbing to them as they refused to say a word unless given instruction. No instruction came. Once again, they were simply being observed. 

Nishinoya could no longer handle the silence nor could he handle the curiosity that riddled the back of his head.

“So… why did they target Kageyama like that just now?”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “So… why did they target Kageyama like that just now?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, I hope you're all doing well. Here's me bringing you another update. Just a full warning!!! Please make sure you know that this chapter does get quite bloody, so if that is something that brings any ill feelings please do not read it! I wish for you all to stay safe and do not want any of my work to upset you, so please be wary. Also I ask everyone as nicely as possible to please visit the links left on my previous two chapters to help support the BLM movement. Till next time<3.

“So… why did they target Kageyama like that just now?”

Sugawara turned to face Nishinoya, his motion slow and rather terrifyingly out of character, “Isn’t it obvious?”

Kageyama held his breath. _Obvious? What do you mean obvious? What’s so obvious? Am I that easy to read? Am I nothing but an open page book whose words are big and bolded and can be read from miles away?_

Suga was wiping tears from his cheeks, sniffling to fight back any more tear induced fluid from seeping down his face, “It’s cause I wrote about him…I’m really sorry. I hope you won’t be too angry with me, Kageyama.”

He let out his held breath in relief. He closed his eyes and pointed his head to the ground in shame. He was not angry at Sugawara, he could never be angry at Sugawara, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that Sugawara should be angry at him. He should be the one to be apologizing. He should be the one who was put under the microscope and interrogated and humiliated to the point of tears. He should have been in Sugawara’s space, just like he was on the court.

“No,” Kageyama shook his head, “I-it’s okay. It’s all true.”

“It isn’t true, it was all so heat of the moment. I wouldn’t ever have any ill intentions towards you.”

The voice that had stayed otherwise silent now felt it was time to chime in, “Oh, boo fucking hoo. Your true colors have been revealed, Sugawara. I called you a nice glass of water before, but I don’t think this water is safe to drink. It's dirty and tarnished now.”

Daichi’s need for defense and protection toward Suga bloomed from a different light as he stepped forward and placed a hand on his back gently. He wasn’t viewing Suga as he usually did, that being a strong level-headed boy whose spirits were lifted with Daichi by his side. He was seeing him as a boy who was hurt, and whose heart was broken and soul was crushed down by his actions. The actions that he knew were wrong but couldn’t fight. 

Sugawara didn’t cower away. He allowed for the touch to linger, allowing himself to get lost in it even though he knew it was wrong. He would do anything to try to drown out the sound of the voice taunting him. 

Hinata’s heart was broken for his vice-captain. That boy did everything under the sun for him. When Hinata needed help during practice, Suga was there. When he took a ball to the face, Suga was there. When Kageyama hurt his feelings, Suga was there, consoling. Always just consoling everybody. Even there in that room, when stakes were high and Hinata was curled in upon himself in the corner, he was there to soothe him. People could make jokes about a ‘team mom’ all they wanted, but Hinata didn’t need another mom, his own mom back home was fine. There was something he needed though, and that was an older brother, and that is just what Sugawara was for him.

He made his way to Suga’s side and placed his arms around his middle crushing him against his smaller body. He squeezed his eyes shut, “You’re my favorite person in the world, Sugawara.”

Kageyama wanted to sneer, but he didn’t want to ruin the moment of comfort he could see Suga had in his eyes. They widened slightly as he regarded Hinata attached at his side before reaching down and returning the gesture. His arms landed on Hinata’s shoulders, his head resting atop his. 

Tanaka was next to move forward, hugging Suga’s other side and resting on his shoulder sadly. Sugawara moved one of his arms from Hinata’s shoulders to Tanaka’s waist.

Although the fear of rejection from his hand being swatted away rang high, Asahi moved forward and hugged Suga’s neck from his front. He held his head against his chest and pat down on his hair, mirroring the ways in which Suga would run his hands through his after he had hard days. The ‘team mom’ jokes didn’t sit with Asahi either. This was nothing but his best friend, a family member he got to choose, the boy who loved him so much and had a side of chaos that only those close to him got to see. He wouldn’t have it any other way.

Yamaguchi moved forward, tugging Tsukishima by his wrist to join him. There was no hesitation in the way Yamaguchi joined the hug, allowing himself to be engulfed into the small huddle created. Tsukishima’s soft spot was activated and he made his way in, towering over the group of boys before him.

Noya decided he would have some fun with it and jumped up on Sugawara’s back, causing the entire group to stumble and nearly crash to the floor. Finally, Sugawara let out a teary laugh.

Daichi observed the group alongside Kagyema, the pair feeling far too awkward and at fault to join the escapade. Instead, Kageyama used his oddly fragile voice to speak up, earning a surprised look from Daichi.

“You’re not perfect, Suga.”

Everyone turned to look at him, Tanaka looking like he was ready to swing his fist back into his face if he said anything wrong.

“But, you don’t have to be.”

Suga smiled at Kageyama softly, apology in his eyes. Kageyama's eyes were just the same, pleading with him to _please_ forgive him, even if he never did anything intentionally. 

“Give me a fucking break,” the voice cackled, ruining the moment and an atmosphere of comfort the boys had managed to create, “No need to get all Kumbaya around the fire now.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Nishinoya’s short fuse had finally blown. His fiery voice proved that there was not only one bomb in the room, but two, probably even more, and one of them had just diffused.

“You getting off on this or something, you sick fuck?”

“Noya,” Asahi’s voice trailed off as fear grew deep in his stomach for the boy as he began to turn. 

“You really must make me start on you now?” The voice said it like a question, but there was no doubt in anybody’s mind that it was a statement. Whether Nishinoya had mouthed off or not, he would have been targeted for whatever dirt this person had on him anyway.

“Fucking try me.”

Nishinoya was confident. He was an open book for everyone. There was not one thing about him he wouldn’t have shared with his team. If he was ever attracted to somebody he’d tell them, even if that meant making a 6’0 tough-looking ace player blush like a small child. If he had an issue at home he would always talk it out with the boys. What could there possibly be-

“You can’t bear the thought of sticking around, can you?”

_-Oh._ So maybe there was one thing.

The voice spoke through the speakers in a tone that made each of the boys feel as if they were being closely analyzed. It somehow managed to sound as if eyes were wandering up each one of them, awaiting the reaction to the words it would relay.

“Do you all really think this little pip-squeak cares about any of you? Do you know what he plans on doing the moment he gets the chance?”

Nishnoya’s confident stance shattered and his shoulders cowered down, similar to the way Yamaguchi’s did when he was finally able to take a breath. He remembered the last time he talked about his future plans. It was a bit foggy, but bits and pieces were visible in his mind. He had been about to play a game, having caught a moment alone in the change room, he called his mom. 

_‘I understand baby,’ her voice on the phone’s opposite end was filled with concern, “but what will you do after? Why don’t you go off to college? Why don’t you play more volleyball?”_

_He kept the phone on speaker as he changed into his uniform, placing his other clothes into his gym bag._

_“I just don’t want to, mom. I had my time. I wanna go explore. I don’t wanna stay tied down here forever.”_

Nishinoya gulped, _who could have possibly heard that?_

The voice was laughing its same nasty laugh, taunting Nishinoya and twisting his words into darker intents, “Sorry boys, you tie this little firecracker down.”

Asahi’s eyes appeared to hold a gaze much sadder than the awkwardly peering eyes of the others around him. He had thought they had plans. They were friends, or maybe they were a little more than that, or maybe they were just partners or companions but all he knew was that it was never in the books for Noya to up and leave him, even if they had the one year difference standing between them.

“Maybe it’s ‘cause he doesn’t feel he could be his own person here with you all.”

Noya squinted at the puppet on the screen, the room seemingly dimmer as the blue shadow casting on his face illuminated his most minor features. Daichi placed a hand on his shoulder, his eyes pleading with him trying to silently relay, _is this true?_ Nishinoya didn’t know. He was hardly comprehending a word being said as his brain descended itself into the lowest pits of oblivion to hide from the shame of his plans being put on display.

He felt slightly guilty for even feeling bad about such a thing. Having seen what Suga had just gone through, his issue appeared more than minor, nonetheless, it was something he didn’t wish to share, and anything one doesn’t wish to share is always speckled with shame and fear.

“He’d probably feel a little better if baldy locks weren’t around.”

Tanaka’s head snapped up to the screen, allowing his face to be engulfed by the blue illumination. 

Unlike anyone else that had ever been in contact with him, the person watching behind the screen was in no way phased by Tanaka’s cutting eyes. The way they threw darts and threatened did not phase the person whose voice was costumed, and they most definitely did not phase the innocent image of the blue puppet.

“The only two starting lineup second years on the team, huh? Not to mention the biggest attention seekers, am I right?”

Tanaka shook his head, “Shut the fuck up.” Daichi was growing nervous with every threatening word the bold pair let slip out. At the end of the day, whether they did what was asked of them or not, this person's hand was on the trigger and could end their lives at any minute. 

The voice seemingly grew impatient as Daichi’s fears manifested silently through the room, “You are not one to tell anyone to shut the fuck, you loud-mouthed child.”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” He was loud and he was pointed in his tone, not trying to mask the anger he was feeling, but the voice he held on the inside was pleading to come out differently. If the silly blue puppet person was growing impatient with him, he was certainly growing impatient right back at them. 

“Mr. Open book, Tanaka Ryu. Some of your so-called friends here like to keep to themselves. They like to keep secrets and hide things, but not you. You just lay it all out on everyone, and nobody wants to hear it.”

Kageyama’s voice was small, “That isn’t true.” Tanaka disregarded him, full attention on the eyes of the puppet as if it were a real person that demanded respect. In the eyes of the inanimate photo, Tanaka could see his parents telling him to do his homework, his sister telling him to clean up after himself, his teachers telling him he needed to raise his grades, his coach telling him he needed to play better.

“Sugawara likes to hide his love and devotion, but oh, not you Tanaka, not you. Poor Kiyoko has to deal with your pestering all day long.”

The sound of her name caused Tanaka’s face to go red. It was not embarrassment or the flush he got when she’d walk by and nod her head at him, it was a flush of anger that one so terrible could even think of letting her name roll of their lips. 

Nishinoya seemed just as angry, stepping forward and shouting before the red-faced Tanaka could even get the chance, “Don’t you dare mention her name.”

“Oh, and would you look at that. Yet another slice of competition between the two of you. God, your friendship must be fun! Just like your annoying little first years, it seems you two are always so obsessed with who is winning and who is losing.”

Both Kageyama and Hinata tensed up at the discreet mention toward them, cowering back together into the wall in mindless unison. Tanaka and Noya, on the other hand, fell short. The pair stood in silence as they observed the screen, the room staying silent around them knowing just what they were thinking.

_Was this person wrong?_

No. Sugawara would tell you that the pair shove each other to get into Shimizu’s eye view every minute of every day. Though it hurt Asahi’s feelings in a small way, he could vouch for Suga as he watched Noya and Tanaka practically tackle each other to help her when she needed it. Daichi could tell you that whenever one tells a funny story, the other would jump in and try to tell one even better. Kageyama would share the time he found them battling it out in the empty practice room, seeing who could hit their head harder on a volleyball. Yamaguchi recalled the time he walked in on them arm wrestling, a bet of three small chocolate milk cartons on the table in front of them. Tsukishima watched them tallying up the number of ‘points’ they each had in the day for how many times they could be called upon in class. Hinata could never forget the time he caught them competing on who could hold their breath for the longest.

If anyone had thought Hinata and Kageyama were bad when it came to trying to one-up one another, they had not yet seen Noya and Tanaka in action. While Tanaka and Noya competed in a much more light-hearted fashion, the tensions were still there. The desire to do better, to represent their grade, to be the staple starting player. No matter how good-willing, their constant battling could not be easily missed.

“With you two it’s always win, win, win, win. Winner takes it all right? Well, I have a new idea for you guys. How about the loser takes it all? Oh yeah, the one who does worse, wins! What do you think?”

Noya glanced at Tanaka apprehensively, “I’m not sure what they mean.”

The voice interrupted before Tanaka could open his mouth to answer, “I wanna play with you two now. Hey, four eyes.”

Tsukishima looked over at the screen, hand slowing reaching up to point at himself. _Me?_

“Yes, you. I saw you dig out that stupid little baggie before. Mind working your magic again?”

For the first time in his life, Tsukishima didn’t have anything to say. As if a sort of mental swap took place, he turned to Yamaguchi, seeking an answer that the latter would normally be looking for. Yamaguchi just nodded at him, whispering softly, “Just do as it says.”

Tsukishima nodded and he turned back to the screen, voice cracking as he spoke, “W-which plant?”

“Left corner by the screen. Dig till you get to the bottom.”

Tsukishima nodded and made his way over to the plant. Like earlier that night when things began to look up for Karasuno, he dug through the soil, cringing as the feel of the real dirt clung itself underneath his fingernails. 

Sugawara frowned, wishing he could help him and get that look of sickness off his pale face. He instead stood in place, hands clenched tightly to his sides, inner cheek being gnawed at harshly by his teeth. He couldn't seem to shake off what he had just done although it appeared everyone else's attention was reverted.

Tsukishima’s face twisted as his hand hit a weirdly shaped solid object in the soil. His hand grasped around it, feeling a rough handle. He squinted for a moment as his brain processed the sense against his hand. He recognized this object, he has held one before. He briefly reminisced on a moment with his brother in the woods by his house, cutting at twigs for no reason other than being bored and having stolen his dad’s shitty pocket knife. 

His breathing stopped. _It wasn’t a knife, was it?_ He pulled the object up from the soil as his heart began to slam against his chest. Once it surfaced, his memory of the feel was telling the truth. In his large palm lay a closed silver pocket knife, trigger glinting, brand new, and ready for a sharp blade to expel. 

“Woah now, okay,” Daichi recognized the object immediately, remembering watching his father sitting in his backyard after gardening, peeling an apple with the dirty blade he pulled from his shirt pocket, “What do you need them to do with that?”

Both Noya and Tanaka stared at the closed knife, eyes wide open. The fear of the unknown seemed to be the only one of existence for the pair at that moment. Forget a dark quiet corridor on a late night or a 6’7 middle blocker on an opposing team, not knowing what was to come for them was the only fear they felt they ever experienced. 

“That’s not all,” the voice took on its sing-song tone, “Go to my right, bean pole. Dig in.”

Tsukishima whimpered under his breath as he moved forward to the plant on the opposing side. He could feel Yamaguchi’s eyes drilling into his back, begging him to just do as he was told. With one hand occupied with the knife, Tsukishima’s left hand dug back in. He couldn’t fight back a slight gag at the feel of the soil now under another set of nails. As he already predetermined, his hand hit the same handle, waiting to be revealed to the anxiously waiting spectators. With a gulp, he pulled it out, turning to the group and holding out the two closed pocket knives with shaking hands.

Nishinoya’s voice was wavering, “W-what are we supposed to do with those?”

“Let’s test your team competitiveness shall we?” The voice was eager to give instruction, “Tanaka, Nishinoya, sit facing each other right here in front of the screen. Bean pole, come stand by them.”

Nobody moved. Stillness took over the room in the form of a blue glaring light, restraining their feet to the ground beneath them. Yamaguchi cleared his throat, urging them to move forward. If they wanted to ever get out, they had to get the show on the road. _This person wouldn’t make them kill each other, would they? Wouldn’t that just defeat the purpose of the bomb?_

Yamaguchi’s pushing sound was not enough to put the boys’ feet in motion. Daichi couldn’t watch much longer, starting to worry himself about what may happen if they did not move. He placed a firm hand on both Noya and Tanaka’s shoulders.

“Just go,” he murmured quietly, giving them a forced encouraging smile and a nod, “I won’t let anything bad happen to you.”

Tanaka gulped and looked over at Nishinoya who glanced up at him. All it would take is one of them to produce a slight nod of the head and they would be sat in the middle of the room awaiting an inevitably doomed fate. Tanaka was the one who nodded down to him, giving them the OK to go. He believed in Daichi’s words, his trust in him only faintly wavering in a way he would never admit after the moment shared with Sugawara moments before. _How did this ever get turned on him?_

They moved to the center of the room, right under the blazing blue glare of the television, and sat down cross-legged, eyes on each other’s. With a hard swallow of a dry lump in his throat, Tsukishima stepped forward. His arms shook as he felt weighed down from the weapons in his hands. 

The voice sounded pleased, “Lovely, now here’s what we’re going to do. Four eyes, hand them the knives.”

Hesitantly, Tsukishima placed a knife in each of the boys' hands.

“Good, good. Now, you two. Pop them open.”

Nishinoya stared down at the blade, his vision blurring as his eyes threatened to turn to waterfalls, “I-I don’t even know how to.”

“Hey,” Tanaka’s voice was soothing, frighteningly out of the ordinary for him. The tone was one none of the boys in the room had ever heard from him, “You just gotta do this.” Nishinoya watched as Tanaka’s thumb pressed down on the switch to the side of the handle, causing a sharp four-inch pocket knife to erupt with a click. 

Asahi shuddered as he stood over Noya, watching him mirror Tanaka’s actions and causing a blade of his own to present the only sound in the room aside from labored breathing. 

“Beautiful, beautiful. Now listen very carefully. As you know, I’ve changed the game a little bit here. My challenge for you two is to hold the blades in your palms, the way you are holding the handles right now. Upon my instruction, you will hold it tighter and tighter unless I say otherwise. In this case, whoever lets go first is technically the winner, because guess what? If you hold on for longer, the one who let’s go first gets to carve something of my choice into your skin.”

Before either of the boys could react, Daichi stepped forward, “That isn’t fucking fair, c’mon! That’s a lose lose how could you even come up with something like that?”

“Oh shut up, Mr. Perfect, I think we’ve already come to the conclusion that you’re no hero,” the voice had clearly grown fed up with Daichi, “If anything I’m testing your team on the way they work together and how much they care about each other. Something you were trying to do when you got them all into this mess, huh?”

Daichi swallowed. The pestering thought that this whole disaster was his fault had been nagging at the back of his brain the whole evening. He could have let the boys go home, have a weekend to themselves, and go back to school on Monday to work things out, but instead he was stubborn. Instead, he insisted. He brought them out of town and into the city, where they were stuck in a room chained by the bounds of some angry sociopath. 

“Don’t get so confident now boys. I could detonate this entire fucking room right now if I wanted to. Now, let’s go. Listen to what I told you.”

Tanaka was first to move, bringing the sharp end of the object in his hand. The clean metal rested gently in his palm as he dared it not to tear his skin until absolutely necessary. Nishinoya’s eyes stayed on his as the tiny pit of confidence transmitted from one to the other. He followed suit in his actions.

“Tsukishima Kei, you got the glasses. I want you to be referee,” a smirk was evident through the voice’s taken tone, “Keep a close watch. Make sure there isn’t any funny business.”

“As if I’d tell you if there was.” Tsukishima’s emotionless voice was blunt. No hesitation or fear to be found for that split moment.

“Tsukki,” Yamaguchi mumbled. It was a classic sound upon Tsukishima’s ears because it was one that he always harbored. He was the one grumbled out, urging Yamaguchi to stop when he began to do something stupid or embarrassing. It was tragically strange and shameful to feel the tone flipped onto him.

The voice was not phased as it laughed, “Oh, it’s fine. I’m not bothered by this blonde tree. Enough playing around now. Ready boys?”

They remained silent, assuming the voice was pushing condescending rhetoric their way.

“Tell me you are ready.”

The pressure of waiting began to creep under Tanaka’s skin and he could no longer stand the slow passing time, “Ready.” His voice was loud and clear. Its strength was encouraging to Nishinoya, who didn’t let his voice break as he nodded his head.

“Ready.”

“Ah, perfect. Now, go on. Squeeze.”

Tanaka held his breath as he forced his hand to close tightly around the sharp blade of the small weapon. His face contorted as he felt a layer of skin battle against the cutting bitterness. With wide eyes, Noya began to squeeze his own hand against the knife, wincing as his sensitive skin began to tore. 

“Oh my god,” Hinata moved back into his fetal crouching position, head hidden tightly between his legs, “oh my god.”

“C’mon. Tighter.”

Tanaka kept his eyes on Noya’s in a blaze of fury as he clenched down onto the knife tighter. His whole body was shaking and silent trickles of tears forced themselves from his eyes. Noya, on the other hand, let the sobs flow through freely, hiccuping as he watched the blood drip to the floor from his hand.

Tsukishia gulped as he watched, fearing the thought of what may happen if he should tear his eyes away. His eyes remained dry behind his frames, but his body shook just as much as each of the latters'. 

“More.”

Snot dripped from Nishinoya’s nose as the intensity of his sobs grew, encompassing the room in a veil of unavoidable tears. A sound none of the boys would ever grow to forget. 

Tanaka let out a scream as he squeezed down on the blade tighter, trails of blood dripping down to his elbow. He was determined to stick it out to the end. Not because he had a point to prove. Not because he wanted to win. Not because he wanted to be ‘better’. He just wanted Nishinoya to be safe, and if that meant Noya cutting him up or doing whatever the sick fuck behind the screen told him to, so be it. Tanaka may have had a full and competitive agenda, but ever hurting his fellow second year in any way was never apart of it.

Suga cried as he watched. This was yet another pain he couldn’t take away, another burden he couldn’t lift from their backs. He’s seen injury before, watching his team members accidentally knock each other’s teeth out, fingers being cut after fast skimming balls raced past, but never anything like this. The small puddle of red growing on the floor was enough to make him no longer see the blue. All he could see was red.

He cried out, unable to take the sight anymore, “One of you fucking let go!”

Tanaka stared Noya dead in the eyes, “Let go, Yu. Right now. Let go.”

“No!” Noya was a sobbing, hiccuping mess. The pain of the blade digging into his palm was unbearable, but like Tanaka, he refused to hurt the other. No competition in the world would ever make him want to hurt his friend.

“Noya, right fucking now!” Tanaka’s voice was threatening, but not in the way it was known to be. That playful undertone of knowing no one would take him seriously was gone and only pure anger and drive took its place. 

He screamed out again, only somehow louder as he tested the strength of his vocal chords, “NO!”

Tsukishima struggled himself, “P-please, one of you, please.”

“Fucking let go, Yu! You better do it right now or so help me once you’re out of here!”

A strength he did not know existed within him took over Asahi’s body as he moved in to take action. Through his busy racing mind, he found an empty slot to analyze the situation. He knew that Tanaka could bear more physically, and whatever it was Noya was to do wouldn’t be as severe for him. Even just assessing the scene in front of him was enough to see that, Tanaka’s eyes wild and dedicated, while Noya’s were closed, wet, and pleading. 

Asahi brought his knee up to the spot between Noya’s shoulders, knocking his body forward. On instinct, his hand opened, dropping the knife onto the ground in front of him.

He sobbed as his clean unharmed hand made its way up to grab hold of his wrist and stare at his bloody hand in shock.

“Woohoo!” The voice was happier than ever, “We have a winner! Four eyes, c'mon do your job!"

Tsukishima hesitated for a moment before reaching out his shaking arm and pointing it into Tanaka's direction, unsure if that was even who he was to point to. His stance reminded him of the ones belonging to the line judges who called on his misplays every game. This moment made him feel just as small as that sharp whistle calling, _out!_

Tanaka threw the knife to the ground, shaking his bloody hand, “Fuck!”

Noya’s tear-stained eyes looked up to meet his and his voice wavered, “Tanaka, I’m so sorry.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Tanaka, I’m so sorry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! Once again, more blood in this chapter as well as direct cu**ing into skin. Also some mentions of past child abuse, so please everyone in their reading stay safe! Thank you all for tuning in<3

_“Tanaka, I’m so sorry.”_

Tanaka’s head moved in unison with his shaking hand, “Stop it, Noya. Stop it. It’s fine. Are you okay?”

His hand was severely cut as blood continued to pool onto the floor, looking like something of a wine stain after a classy drunken night. 

Daichi crouched down to meet eye-level with Tanaka, gently taking his hand into his. He examined the deep slits made into his palm and fingers, frowning at the flow of blood. He looked over at Nishinoya, grabbing hold of his hand in a mirroring action. The wounds appeared less severe, but still pooling blood nonetheless. 

He wasn’t afraid of blood, or at least he felt that he couldn’t be. As a captain, he felt his authority is present both on and off the court, no matter what the situation. He had to stay cool and calm and take action when needed. 

_What’s a little blood?_ He could ask himself. He can bandage up bloodied fingers, spit blood from missing teeth into a sink, clean a bloody scrape off an underclassman’s knee with a smile on his face. He could be strong for his team, make them feel invincible even when they’re hurt. But no one sees him on the inside as he squirms and scowls and wishes he could turn his head to the side and release all the contents of his stomach onto the floor.

The voice came through the speakers again, sounding euphoric and pleased. To this person, the act was ritualistic. It was was the victory. It was repentance. It was the surrender. But they weren’t done yet. 

“Ah, no need to get all cleaned up just yet, you know we aren’t finished.”

Nishinoya’s nose ran salty fluid down onto his upper lip and hiccups fought out of his throat as he turned to look at the screen, eyes reflecting obnoxious blue. 

Through the morphed speaker, the faint sound reminiscent of pages flipping rang through the players’ ears. Sugawara closed his eyes as his brain flashed back to his moment in the spotlight what seemed like hours before. The person behind the screen had been reading from his notebook. In a twisted game of fate, something that lied in the excretion of that dead tree would likely forever be imprinted on Tanaka’s skin in the form of a scar.

“Quite the doodler, huh angel boy?” The voice giggled as pages continued to be flipped.

Suga gulped, the lump in his throat so large that he would be surprised if nobody had heard the sound of him forcing it down. Whenever he had the small book on hand, he would sketch into it out of boredom. Many of the pages were filled more with random scribbles and drawings than any words. 

“What shall we do, what shall we do?” Pages continued to be flipped until the crisp rustling sound came to a halt. “Ah. That’s more like it.”

Nishinoya whimpered as he stared down at his bleeding hand. The last thing he wanted to do at that moment was make his unwounded hand create another wound on his friend’s body. The thought of having to hurt Tanaka yet again- and much more directly- distracted him from the stinging of his palm.

“Superman!” The voice was laughing as it called out the random name that took everyone by surprise, “Perfect! I like it!”

Sugawara cleared his throat. Only he knew the specifics of the voice’s commands. He was the singled one out of the group that could decode the words of the self-indulging puppet. On two whole pages of the notebook, Sugawara had gone on a doodling rampage of the graffiti style _S_ that he hadn’t otherwise thought of since he was in middle school. 

He spoke up to ease the faces of confusion seen around the room, “The Superman S thing…the one with the lines.”

Asahi nodded his head slowly, speaking quietly and timidly, “I used to draw that when I was a kid.”

“Give ‘em a little demonstration why don’t you, sweet boy?”

Suga’s hands shook as he reached forward for the stray pen left out on the table. The sight of the pen seemed so foreign to him, an object lost back in innocent times when all it was was a prop to aid them in solving the mysteries of the room, and all the room was was a fun game to bring them together. When all the taunting blue puppet was was a joke shared over a restaurant table. 

Daichi grabbed hold of Sugawara’s wrist gently, the anxiety of touching him turning more into an anxiety of him losing it completely as he watched the boy shake feverishly. 

“Let me,” he muttered. His voice still hid behind a veil of quiet pity and everyone around noticed it. Sugawara felt the sad eyes of his peers burning into him, feeling bad for him, and he felt that right at that moment he could throw up. 

He knew that if he tried, he wouldn’t be able to write anything with his shaking hands, so silently, he allowed Daichi to take over, as he always did. As he always would. 

With a sniffle and a nervous breath, Daichi took hold of the pen and the scrap piece of paper sat on the table. Much like Suga, the viewing of the items seemed to crash him back down to an Earth he hadn’t even realized he'd left. He felt that some of those around him felt the same by the way Tsukishima’s exhausted eyes peered at them absently and Hinata’s eyes began to water. 

He started with 3 vertical lines, side by side. He left a decent amount of space between them for the coming additions. Right below, he repeated the drawing and then began to connect the lines. Two times crossed right, two times-much smaller now- crossed left. 

The boys knew all that was to be drawn, all they needed to hear was the “Superman S” and Asahi's recollection of younger years to understand, yet they all stared wide-eyed at what Daichi created, the image now taking on a new horror. 

Tsukishima found himself laughing bitterly at the image, reminders of a simpler time being bored to death in class, and finding the image incredibly stupid. Yamaguchi gave him a light tap to his side. When Tsukishima peered down at him, he met eyes that were surely meant to be threatening, warning, but all they were were pleading. _Please, now is not the time._

Shakily, Daichi brought the small sheet of paper over to where Tanaka and Nishinoya sat bleeding on the floor. Tanaka huffed and tore his eyes away from the page, shaking more blood from his hand onto the floor. It wasn’t a rounded or gentle image, it was harsh with rigid straight lines that would be easy to carve into the skin. Lines, so many lines. It would hurt, but he fought within himself as he acknowledged that the mental pain on Noya’s end would be far worse.. 

Nishinoya’s sobs grew louder as he looked down at the photo, shaking his head.

“No, no,” he brought a sleeve up to his eyes, shooing away his falling tears, “That’s too much.”

“Noya,” Tanaka reached forward and placed his bloody hand over Nishinoya’s shoulder. “I’m fine, buddy. You do it. It’ll be fine.” 

Tanaka’s moment of vulnerability was even more gentle and consoling than the one that happened in the minutes before. Hinata’s eyes widened slightly as he watched him speak so soothingly. He was clearly in pain and there was no beating around the fact that he was to be in more, yet there he was, speaking all hushed and pleading with Noya to just do it. Hinata couldn’t help but see Sugawara in him and felt a strange sense of comfort in knowing that when it came down to it, Tanaka too would be there to help too.

Tanaka forced out a laugh, “C’mon, Noya. I deserve it, I gave you a ball to the head the other day. Let’s go, even Steven.”

His hand left its spot on Noya’s shoulder, leaving a bloody handprint to never be washed away. He reached to his side and grabbed one of the stray knives that were thrown onto the ground, unsure of which one belonged to who and not caring. Tanaka tried to picture it as a twisted sort of bold oath if he had picked up the knife belonging to Nishinoya. It bound them together forever, as classmates, teammates, friends, and brothers, no matter how far away Noya planned to go. 

“Here,” he pushed the knife into Noya’s uncut hand, urging him to take it. 

Nishinoya’s teary eyes met his, pleading with him to _please, please, just stop. Let’s just give up now, we’ve already done so much._ Tanaka only shook his head at him, _exactly, look at all we’ve already done._

Noya took the knife into his hand, breathing heavily as he stared down at the blade, imagining the way it once pierced through his palm and the pain that it inflicted. 

“Please, Noya,” Kageyama whispered from behind him. He had been otherwise quiet, but the extremity of the situation made him hold faith that it may be over after this. If Nishinoya committed the brutal act of carving the childish sketch into Tanaka’s skin, they would all get to go home. It could not possibly get worse than this. The cold blue couldn’t possibly swallow them up anymore. 

With a deep breath, Nishinoya shifted forward on his knees, limbs shaking with every move. Tanaka rolled up the sleeve of his shirt, awaiting the infliction.

‘W-wait,” Tanaka had promised himself a tough facade, but he wouldn’t be able to do it on his own, “Daichi.”

Daichi crouched down to him, hand on his shoulder. His words hid behind his eyes, _talk to me._ He didn’t have the confidence in the croaking his vocal cords would have likely let out. 

“C-can you just…hold me up or something.”

Daichi didn’t respond. He only crouched behind Tanaka, arms hooked under his armpits to hold him. His strong body rested up against the nearly as strong back, ready to keep it up to avoid any crouching or squirming. He would keep him up straight and strong like he always did. 

Tanaka nodded to Nishinoya, turning his head away slightly, “Okay.”

Noya shook as he took another shift forward and Tsukshima shoved Yamaguchi further behind him to shield his view from the horror to come.

“I’m so sorry.” Noya placed the blade onto Tanaka’s upper arm, allowing it to press hard enough to tear through the skin, and he drew a line down. 

Tanaka let out a scream as he tried to squirm away, but Daichi held him tightly in place, tears he didn’t even bother trying to hide pouring down his face. Daichi could be strong in stature for Tanaka, but he could not be strong in his mind to watch his teammate be hurt. 

Two more lines.

Then three more.

Then two across the right.

A smaller two across the left.

Hinata had to cover his ears as Tanaka’s screams and a mixture of both Nishinoya and Daichi’s cries filled the room. Everyone else was shocked to silence, eyes not being able to leave the sight of blood dripping from Tanaka’s arm. 

“Bravo! What a show!” Clapping could be heard from the speaker as the sadistically pleased person praised Nishinoya’s work. He tossed the knife to the floor and curled in on himself, similar to the way Hinata had done before. 

Kageyama was unable to react to any of it, the plan stare on his face overpowering his troubling thoughts. He had never heard nor seen Tanaka cry in the way that he was now, back slumped against Daichi, wailing like a baby with his eyes closed tightly. He actually had never seen Tanaka cry at all and was sure that everyone else in the room could say the same. 

“Fuck,” Daichi lifted Tanaka slightly from his spot on his chest, his shirt now stained with the blood of Tanaka’s arm. “He’s bleeding a lot. Someone come help.”

“I got him.” For the first time, Asahi let his small hidden fraction of bravery win and he moved forward to allow Tanaka to slump into his arms. He was a relatively affectionate man. His teammates always turned to the tall, strong-looking ace player when it came to the need for a hug or a pat on the back, but never Tanaka. The way he melted forward into his arms was a result of pure exhaustion and pain, not the desire to be held or taken care of. A Tanaka in his right mind would have hated the sight. 

Daichi took the opportunity to move back slightly and pull the shirt from his body. A chill traveled up his spine as the room’s cool temperature hit his bare back. His illogical conscious told him it was because of the blue reflection. To him, it was casting ice all around him, forcing him into discomfort. 

“Hold onto him, Asahi.” 

Asahi nodded as he held him with gentle arms, not shifting him or making any swift movements that would cause him any pain. 

Daichi stepped forward on his knees and twisted the shirt so it mirrored that of a rope. As he tied it around Tanaka’s arm to cover the wound and hopefully still the bleeding, he saw the long rope they once tugged on as a team. Karasuno’s basketball team had been on the other side, pulling with all their might. The volleyball club won, pulling the rope into their field, leaving the basketball kids reeling backward. _That is what I’ll do right now_ , he thought, _we all will._

Tanaka whimpered as they moved him to slump up against the wall, “Don’t move me so much,” his voice was above a whisper, “I’m fine, it just hurt. Let me stay against here.”

Sugawara moved to sit next to him, holding his other arm in a gentle and protective manner. The touch was barely there, but it told him _I’m here_ and that was all Tanaka needed. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Nishnoya rocked back in forth with his hands behind his head. His crying was uncontrollable, and though silent for a moment, it was now breaking loose and bouncing off of every wall in the small room. 

They all looked at each other, those same sad pitying eyes meeting and everyone being too awkward and stiff to make a move. Everyone but for once, Asahi.

“Noya, come,” he knelt down in front of him, lifting him up slightly. Nishinoya kept his face covered. The mess of tears and blood tracks left from his hands had him hiding in shame. 

Asahi took him into his arms, holding him against his chest and rubbing his back with a strong hand. His heart broke at the feeling of Nishinoya’s shuddering breaths, but he could tell that he was coming down from his high of emotions as he began to rest closer into Asahi’s arms and his breathing became somewhat manageable.

“Well, well, well,” the voice finally interjected after keeping itself out of the chaos, “Look at you big man.”

He turned to look at the screen, eyes slightly widened. 

“Acting all strong and comforting. So unlike you, huh?”

That’s it. The spotlights were turned onto him now. _I should have known better, now it's my turn._ Suddenly, the spark of courage he was so grateful to have felt seemed more of a curse that he wished he could have gone back to minutes before and taken away from himself. 

“Always so scared and timid. So strange for such a big scary boy like you.”

He gulped as he tried to avoid the daggers the words sent into his chest, piercing through his back. Sure, it was nothing like what he just watched unfold, but he was insecure and words really hurt him. That was his own fatal flaw, but only he knew it was so much more than that-at least for that last very moment.

“Why don’t you share why you are this way? Why you always just chose to hide away from everything that scares you.”

Asahi’s eyes searched the room. He tried to find matching ones that would ease his racing heart that was beating against Nishinoya’s head. They were all lost on him until he found Suga’s. With his head rested lightly on Tanaka’s shoulder, he smiled a sad smile that only Asahi knew. It was a smile only reserved for him. Encouraging smiles from Suga went all around, but this one, _this one_ , that said _whatever you do, I’ll still be here_ , was only for him.

“Tell them. Before I do it for you.”

Asahi shut his eyes and his grip on Noya tightened. If Nishinoya hadn’t been a hurt and crying mess, he would have been peering up at his ace, hands on either side of his face, telling him that it was okay, he could talk. 

“U-um,” to even find a place start felt impossible to him. He shuddered as he thought of the places the topic could go. But then he realized he was no longer thinking, he was feeling. He could feel the fist of his angry father, the sharp nails of his overworked mother. He could hear the yelling, hot and ruthless in his face, telling him all the did wrong. All he did wrong as a five-year-old boy caught between the crossfire of a failing marriage. 

“Big man.”

Asahi opened his eyes, the tone having caught him off guard. It wasn’t the taunting, distorted voice pulling the name out on him. It was Suga. Suga and his gleaming gentle eyes. Another smile was sent to him, “I love you.”

He choked out a bit of a laugh, I love you’s were not uncommon, especially amongst him and Suga who were devastated to be separating come graduation, but the instance of the statement made him blush slightly, caught off guard and embarrassed.

“I do too,” a quiet voice spoke from his arms. He looked down to meet Nishinoya’s still closed eyes but now uncovered face, “I love you.”

“We all do.” Tsukishima was overcome with embarrassment at having to say that, but the part of him that wanted both for the night to just come to an end and the one that wanted to be even slightly encouraging made him speak out. It worked, as Asahi sent him a shock infused look of confusion before settling comfortably on the floor and beginning to talk.

“I never really talk much about my childhood.. there’s only ever been one person that knew..but they aren’t in my reach anymore.”

He remembered her dark hair. Her apologetic eyes.

“My parents split up when I was really young, but it put me through a really hard time. Not just because we would have to live all apart from each other, but because… they were a little violent with me.”

Nishinoya’s eyes were open now, but Asahi refused to meet them as he stared down at the floor. Tanaka’s eyes were now opened too, listening in curiosity. 

The ever so anticipated warped voice seemed to want more, “Tell them what they used to say. What they used to do.”

Asahi gulped and Nishinoya clung to his t-shirt affectionately, printing it with a handprint of his blood much like the one left by Daichi on his own shoulder. 

“T-they used to tell me it was my fault… that they were splitting up,” he couldn’t fight back a helpless nervous smile that put everyone on an uncomfortable edge, “If I did anything, even something so small… like t-trip on a step and scrape my knee, I would just get hit…sometimes even more.”

“Asahi,” Sugawara breathed. His head was now lifted from where it rested on Tanaka’s shoulder, both of the pair seeming to now sit up straight. 

Kageyama turned and looked away, Hinata’s eyes following, unable to ignore his subconscious studying of his teammate even when off the court. He already felt insensitive enough for all of the Sugawara business, but his brain was screaming out to him that it made sense. He watched that tall man flinch away from a fly landing on his shoulder, of course he had issues at home growing up. 

“It’s different now, though. It’s just my mom and I and we don’t really… communicate. It avoids conflict, so I don’t mind. I don’t need to have a whole close family.”

“But, you do have one,” Noya brought that once rigid and scared hand up to Asahi’s face, cradling his cheek and staining it with some of his blood, “A huge one. A family of twelve to be exact.” 

Tanaka smiled weakly and spoke up for the first time since he had been slumped over against the wall with Suga, “Yeah. You got all of us.”

“You’re stuck with us, man. Sorry.” Daichi shrugged and patted him on the shoulder. At the end of the day, he could acknowledge it himself, no matter how amazing his home life may be, he spends more of his time with these boys than his own family. They had built their own, and just like any family, they would come across speed bumps. Sometimes really large ones. Sometimes these really large ones are painted blue and like to taunt and threaten them with the edge of their lives. But they were only speed bumps. And they were only a family. 

Asahi laughed, his face brightening, “I don’t mind.”

A mocked gag could be heard through the speaker, “My God, you guys are boring, always getting so sentimental and shit. Is that what gives you guys all your wins? Anyway, I’m not done with you yet, don’t get all happy. What about the family you were about to have, hm?”

Asahi’s face went pale. _Who would have known that?_

“Don’t look so scared now, big boy. Go on and tell them the real reason why you stopped playing volleyball in second year.”

Yamaguchi furrowed his eyebrows. Everyone knew why Asahi had taken a break. A broken broomstick and an angry fireball of a libero were explanation enough. What more could there have been to it?

He was visibly distressed and the look of nausea over his face was enough to make Hinata clutch his stomach in nervous pain. The whole room witnessed the battle he was fighting with himself, pushing to just say it. Get it out. get it over with. Even if it would hurt some people. More specifically the person curled up in his lap.

“L-last year,” he had to swallow down a large pool of saliva, eyes not roaming the room for affirmation in fear of catching a reaction, “There was an incident with a girl. She went to another school, so you wouldn’t know her.”

Nishinoya was more alert than he had been, ears perking up at the mention of a girl. He was one to be getting riled up, his attention always on Kiyoko despite his interest in the ace. He knew, to an extent, that it bothered Asahi, but he himself knew deep down that his admiration for her rooted from his constant battle with Tanaka. He never truly wanted her in the way that he did. 

He shuddered and a tear streamed down his cheek, “I loved her. Like a lot. Told her everything,” he shrugged and sniffled as another tear ran down to his chin, “Maybe I loved her a little too much because she ended up getting pregnant.”

Tsukishima had to take his glasses off and rub his eye to process what Asahi had just said, “Jesus,” he whispered, feeling Yamaguchi’s hand gently clutch at the back of his shirt. 

Nishinoya’s eyes widened, those around following suit. 

Suga was the only one to speak up, “Asahi, you never said anything. W-what happened? Do you hav-“

“No,” Asahi shook his head and more tears trickled over his cheeks, “She ended up losing the baby…almost thankfully.”

“That’s not all~” the voice chimed.

Asahi was clearly taken aback by the interruption, closing his wet eyes and taking in a sharp breath. Despite his disappointment in hiding from him, Nishinoya squeezed on his hand to encourage him. 

“Her family, they really weren’t happy. Like they were pissed…I ended up getting in some trouble with them. More specifically her dad and some of her uncles. They uh,” He closed his eyes again, suddenly feeling the ringed fists of men beating into his sides the feeling of dirty spit landing on his face, sharp toed boots puncturing his stomach. 

“It’s okay,” Noya whispered.

The small encouragement sent his words into a race. 

“They hurt me really bad. I had to pretend like I was fine, cause I didn’t want anyone finding out, but I was all beaten up. I felt really out of commission and I knew I couldn’t play well even if I tried. That and of course there was the fight…” He trailed off awkwardly, leaving the room in an uncomfortable blue haze of silence. 

The silence only made him feel worse and he almost wished the blue puppet would have one thing to say. But it didn’t, at least not yet. It liked to watch him suffer, to watch him let go of Noya and curl into himself in shame, back shaking with each sob that left his mouth. 

Noya and Suga both moved forward, settling on either one of his sides and rubbing his back. Suga’s hand traveled the broad figure, whispering softly into his hair, “It’s okay, no one's upset at you. We’re so sorry.”

Daichi couldn’t find any words or actions to bring to his friend. This seemed like such a groundbreaking thing, something that could have been make or break had it been directly addressed within their friend group. What would Kiyoko say, as a woman? What would Suga have said if he was told while it was happening? Would he have been as soothing? As sympathetic? He worried most about what he would have done as himself. Would he have supported him? Congratulated him? Told him he was a massive idiot and made him cry some more?

He realized that he likely would have done exactly what he was doing at that moment. Nothing. He would have stood there in shock, unable to offer him any support. He would have watched him suffer, feeling for him on the inside but struggling to convey it. Maybe that was why he could never take any of his love interests seriously. While he was strong and supportive in the games, or when given a chance to observe the situation, he was never able to act on a whim to startling news, finding himself standing their dumbly with nothing to say or do. 

The voice finally took its place in the conversation with a laugh, “Oh, here we go again, more crying and comforting. Seriously, a big guy like you has to cry? You can’t defend yourself? What kind of a man are you?”

Asahi nearly choked as his tears mixed with gasps and his lungs fought for breath as they drowned in the welled up emotions he had been suppressing. 

“You’re such a little crybaby. Really, it’s so strange. Every last one of you on this team seemed to be so girly and soft.”

Yamaguchi frowned, he had heard things like that slung at him before. 

“That must be very lucky for you then, huh Kageyama?”

Kageyama's head stayed pointed to the ground while Hinata’s struck right back up.

“Why don’t you just leave him alone?”

Kageyama was taken aback to hear Hinata’s voice, sounding strong and unbreakable, but mostly he was surprised to hear him coming to his defense. Even if he had no idea what the voice had been inferring. He stared at him with glossy eyes, _I would do the same for you._

The laughter made the stomachs of every last boy in there turn, “Oh, please. I’ll deal with you later.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Oh, please. I’ll deal with you later.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!TRIGGER WARNING!! Now more than ever I suggest being weary of the warnings. There will be talks of ea*ing d*sorders in this chapter, more specifically b**imia, so please please proceed with caution!! As much as we all enjoy reading some angst it is so important to me that you all stay careful and safe. If your, or anyone you know is struggling please ask for help, you are not alone. Without further ado, I hope you all enjoy!

_“Oh, please. I’ll deal with you later.”_

The vague ‘brush-aside’ made Hinata’s stomach turn in anger. There was nothing he hated more than being pushed back as an afterthought. It was something he’d seen all to often and couldn’t ever bring himself to get used to. Between being overlooked in the hallway or poked fun at before a game, the act of shrugging off the small boy’s power was the perfect fuel to match his hidden fire. 

“I’m right here, you can deal with me right now.”

Hinata had his fists clenched at his sides, his face turning red with frustration. He was acting out of pure boldness and from his hazy spot on the floor against the wall, Tanaka couldn’t help a weak chuckle. 

The voice seemed to find the sight just as comical as its laughter filled the room for what seemed like the thousandth time.

“I’ll deal with you on my own accord, you little pest. Thank you very much.”

Hinata grunted and moved to stand by Kageyama, ready to leap to his defense if needed. The closeness made Kageyama go stiff. All he needed was for that to draw more attention.

In exhaustion, Asahi slumped himself against the wall next to Tanaka, closing his eyes in the process and allowing his breath to find its control.

Noya gulped as his eyes scanned the room. He debated whether or not it would be appropriate to light-heartedly speak with Asahi, but he fear that the atmosphere was still too tender kept his throat tight and his mouth closed. 

“I know you have something to say,” Asahi’s voice was above a whisper and his eyes remained closed, but the faint smile on his face was warm and inviting, “Just say it.” It was enough to make him feel as if the time was perfect and the eggshells left over the ground could be stomped on. Nothing could possibly hurt any more than what had just happened. _Right?_

Nishinoya chuckled, “I guess we’re even now.”

Asahi opened his eyes, tilting his head at him in question, “What do you mean?”

“I mean in terms of secrets. I gave you one, you gave me one.”

He spread his arms out urging Noya to come and join him, “Well then, I guess it's like Tanaka said, Even Steven.”

With a giggle Nishinoya gently placed himself back into Asahi’s arms, allowing the brief moment of comfort to make him forget the predicament he and his team were left in. 

“I know you want to get away,” Asahi’s hand was strong as it rubbed over Noya’s back, “That’s fine. But can you take me with you?”

“Of course I can.”

Sugawara watched the pair with a smile. It was more than genuine, but underneath was a hint of painful envy. _What was it with everyone having someone to love them but him?_

He couldn’t bring himself to understand it. He saw all of his friends getting into relationships, having reciprocated crushes, or even just having casual hookups and date nights out, but even aside from his troubles with Daichi, he never got any of that. _Was there something wrong? Was he not good enough?_

He liked to think he did everything he could, caring for others and always proving he had a nurturing side. _Wasn’t that something that would make people like him? **Want** him, even?_ His smile turned into a frown, but it wasn’t one shot toward his happy friends as it was shot toward himself. His own feelings and insecurities shot an arrow through his heart at least once a day, but no one had to know that.

Unfortunately for him though, someone always did. That someone was the reason his insecurities would peak in the first place. That someone was Daichi, who could see right through him as clear as day. 

Daichi placed an arm around his shoulders, pulling him into his side in a familiar action. He pressed the side of his face against his shoulder, leaving a discreet kiss on the fabric of his shirt. The action was silent but to Suga it read, _I’m sorry._ He didn’t try to fight it off, instead, he leaned into it slightly, basking in the moment that no one appeared to have acknowledged. 

“You can be upset with me later. Right now, I’m gonna take care of you.”

Daichi had whispered directly into his ear, sending a shiver through him. It was just that easy and Daichi knew that. He hated himself for seeing Sugawara as an easy game to play, but that nagging non-committal part of his brain basked in the fact that he was just so simple to get through to, and in moments where tension was at its peak, it worked in his advantage to be able to calm him down.

“You guys are going to make me puke.” The agitation of the puppet’s voice mimed someone who was reaching a breaking point. “Why do you all have to be so boring. Besides, no one here is ' _even'_ with secrets. There’s still more that has to be said.”

Everyone stared around the room in silence, eyes roaming everywhere but the screen. It felt to each of them as if they were sat in a classroom with a teacher at the front, ready to call on whoever met their eye and force them to solve a problem they didn’t know the answer to. 

“What about you, freckles? Awfully quiet back there, huh?”

Yamaguchi’s eyes widened as he slowly lifted his head to look at the screen. He gulped. His throat was failing him as it tightened around his words, forcing them in their place. He has been here before, he’s been here a thousand times. Someone getting to close, to playful, to antagonizing, pushing for a rise out of him. Every time, no matter how many countless times it could happen, he was left frozen in place, unable to respond. 

Daichi’s head lifted from Suga’s shoulder, a protective instinct toward the rather helpless appearing first year kicking in. He went to speak up but was quickly shut down by the voice. 

“This whole time, all of your friends have been getting it rough, and all you’ve been doing is standing there, hm?”

His hands became shaky-if they weren’t already before- as he lifted them to rub his eyes. The black spots that appeared as he smashed his fingers against his eyelids only accentuated the visions he was trying to block out. The taunts and the hits and the slings. 

“Why don’t you say something?”

Yamaguchi’s mouth opened, words ready to fly out. To scream and fight and just tell the stupid puppet, to tell everyone, to leave him alone. He was ready, his voice was ready, the words were there, they were crying to be spoken, to be heard. Everyone around him watched in awe, prepared to see their timid teammate finally speak up for himself. 

His voice worked, that was for sure. But all it would allow was a whimper. A whimper loud enough for the whole room to step back in a half-expected disappointment. 

Tears began to well up in Yamaguchi’s eyes only to be stopped by a hand on his arm. He looked up to see Tsukishima, who wasn’t looking at him, but the screen. 

“You fucking lay off of him, understand? If you have an issue with him you can take it up with me.”

Yamaguchi couldn’t help the small sigh of relief and smile that appeared on his once weary face. That was Tsukki, always there to run to his defense. Sure, they were secretive, quiet, even a little shy when it came to their relationship, maybe Tsukishima even looked a little mean and even bored with him, but it was times like these that put everyone’s (even Yamaguchi's) questions to rest. That tall cold boy would go to the ends of the Earth to make sure nobody tried to step to Yamaguchi. 

“Oh, really? I have to take it up with you?”

“Yes.”

Tsukishima lost all of the fear he once harbored. His eyes were sharp and his fist that lay to his side was clenched tightly. His grip on Tadashi’s arm was the only thing about him at that moment that was gentle. By the looks of it, no one standing in that room could’ve imagined how gently pressed that hand was, working only to soothe the boy despite his livid red-seeing anger. 

Asahi watched the scene unfold, tilting his head in wonder. Passion was not really something he had ever seen in his younger teammate, but this night was certainly changing that. He was more than passionate right now, aiding to his boyfriend’s defense, and he had even been sweet and caring before when he told Asahi they all loved him.

If this was who Tsukishima _really_ was, Asahi _really_ liked him. He never bothered trying to get all that close with him before aside from brief exchanges of instructions and play improvements out of a pure fear that the boy would reject him, but this other side of him was rather soothing to see despite how violent he clearly wanted to act out. 

If the puppet’s face wasn’t inanimate, it would have been smiling as the mimic began to chuckle.

“Yes? Why is that?”

Yamaguchi tugged at Tuskishima’s sleeve gently to catch his attention but his eyes never left the screen, leaving Yamaguchi to have to fight real words out of his mouth.

“Tsukki, don’t.”

He stepped slightly more in front of him, reaching both of his arms out behind him to gently hold onto Yamaguchi’s sides. He was in no mind to be nurturing or sweet, nor did he want to in front of their whole team, but he would be damned if some low life obsessed stalker person started to attack his boyfriend. 

The voice mimed Yamaguchi’s, “Yeah, Tsukki. Don’t.”

Tsukishima shook his head, his rising frustration turning his pale skin a light shade of pink. That was his own ‘easy-to-read’ vice. Whenever he felt tested or cheated or played, from his legs to the tip of his head, he would flush. It pissed him off more than ever at that moment as he felt he was letting that sick puppet fuck win.

“Fuck you,” he growled, “Leave him alone.”

“Oh, please. What are you? The Yamaguchi Tadashi defense team?”

_Yes actually_ , Yamaguchi wanted to say. There wasn’t a time Tsukki wasn’t saving his ass. From mutters of ' _pathetic_ ' to full-blown smashes to people’s faces, Tadashi could always trust that he was safe and protected when around Kei. 

“It doesn’t matter what I am. You’re gonna leave him alone.”

The speaker echoed what sounded like a tsk or a click of the person’s tongue as they listened to Tsukishima’s words. The sound almost creating an audio of what an eye roll would potentially sound like.

“Oh, I know what you are, Tsukishima Kei. I know very well what you are.”

Yamaguchi shivered from behind him, fighting off the urge to tightly wrap himself around Tsukki’s back and bury his face into the fabric of his shirt. He decided the most he could do was close his eyes and pretend that’s what he was doing. While he was at it, he could pretend he was anywhere else to, like on the back of Tsukki’s bike or atop Tsukki’s bed while he ignored him and studied with his headphones in. 

His eyes shot open and he returned to the room mentally at the puppet’s next words.

“And it isn’t loyal nor honest.”

Yamaguchi could see Tsukishima’s breathing stop from the way his almost heaving back stilled. He seemed just as taken by surprise but almost… _guilty_. 

He began to heat up and everyone near watched as a bead of sweat rolled down the side of his forehead. 

“Why don’t you tell your precious boy here, or better yet, your whole team what you did?… What you continue to do.”

His once state of blushed pink turned into a full-fledged burning red as his eyes widened and his breath came back in broken spurts. 

“Tsukki,” Yamaguchi spared himself the stress of everyone watching, nobody cared anyway, especially not after having to watch their captain and vice-captain kiss. He ran his hands up and down Tsukishima’s slim sides and turned down his tone as he began to get more personal with the latter, “What is it, baby? You can say it.”

Tsukishima shook his head, barely even registering the soothing gestures that his boyfriend was relaying to him. 

Kageyama watched in amazement, _looks like something finally got Tsukishima to shut up_. He looked to his right and met Hinata’s eyes. They were looking up at him with the same question and wonder as his own. Though they didn’t spend nearly as much time with Kei as Tadashi did, they felt they would know if there was something… _sketchy_. After all, Tsukki was a pretty plain guy whose only routine involved volleyball, studying, his boyfriend, and being a little bit of an asshole. Kageyama was able to read his eyes and simply shrugged back to him, _fuck if I know._

Sugawara took it upon himself to be encouraging, “It’s okay, Tsukishima. C’mon, it can’t possibly be worse than anything we’ve done.”

He awaited the reaction he got from the other boys when a light-hearted poke was made. A chuckle, a grin, a small breath of relief at the ice breaker. But Sugawara got nothing. Tsukishima only looked like he had tensed up even more. 

Yamaguchi turned him so that he can look him in the face. His nerves were much further out of the room than he wished he could be physically, but he felt that being strong for Tsukki was most important at that moment. He began to rub his arms in a soothing motion while looking up at him with a sweet smile. 

“You can talk to me. It’s okay, it’s like you’re directing it to just me. You know you can tell me anything.”

He was shaking his head again. His eyes refused to meet Yamaguchi’s although he was staring directly into his. He looked at Yamaguchi’s mouth, his chest, the floor behind him, anywhere else. He just didn’t have the heart to look back into those beautiful apologetic eyes.

“Last time I checked, I don’t got all night. Don’t make me blow this room up. Spit it out already, bean pole.”

The vision in Tsukishima’s head was clear.

_Dark hair, hands on his body, kisses left on his face and neck._

_Sounds a lot like Yamaguchi._

_Except no._

_Taller, broader, hands rougher._

The face of Nekoma’s team captain was clear in his mind as his heart began to race. He was about to break his childhood lover’s heart. 

The push from the puppet was what sent Tsukishima out of his trance. His words ran out like a horse on a track, desperate to just be delivered, to be out of the situation, to get the heavy burden sat on his back off as soon as possible. 

“I swear, Yamaguchi, i-it doesn’t mean anything.”

If there had been a rope attaching Tsukishima and Yamaguchi, that rope had just snapped. 

Yamaguchi’s hands left their spot on his arms as his body began to float back. The sounds of _Kuroo. Training camp. After practice. Did something. Doesn’t._ All rang through his ears, sending him into a trance of his own.

“D-doesn’t? Does that mean you’re still doing it?” The tears were slowly streaming down his face now.

This moment was every insecurity he ever had expelling out to him. Tsukishima had opened his mouth and vomited all of Yamaguchi’s worst fears onto his face, his body, his clothes. _Not pretty enough? Not nice enough? Boring? What was it?_ To the newly heartbroken boy, it was all of it. 

“I-I,” Tsukishima had been at a loss for words, unsure of how to admit his continuous wrong, “….Sometimes. Sometimes yes, but I swear.” He reached forward to grab hold of his hand but Yamaguchi took a sharp step backward, nearly smashing into Hinata in the process. Tsukishima started to cry himself, too. “Please, baby, come here, I didn’t mean it, I never meant any of it. It was just a stupid fling, I love you, only you.”

Yamaguchi hid his face behind his hands as he began to cry much harder than before. It didn’t matter whether it meant anything or not, it happened, and Tsukki had put him in a place of second just like everyone else did when he decided to share his affections with someone else.

Hinata shifted closer to Kaegyama so that his whisper could only be heard within his earshot.

“So that’s why he’s so weird with Kenma.”

“Huh.” Kageyama watched the scene unfold before him. It made a lot of sense, as did many other things he began to calculate. 

He also realized that he had never cared much for Yamaguchi, but watching him cry like that made him want to knock Tsukishima right in the jaw. But maybe he already always wanted to do that. 

Despite Yamaguchi’s clear rejection by the way he swatted away every chance Tsukki’s hands got on his body, he wasn’t about to quit pleading with him. Pet names or affectionate touches were never, ever, shared in front of the team yet there he was, cooing out slings of _baby_ or a _ngel_ or _sweetie_ , in an attempt to get any sort of response. At that point, he had completely forgotten the rest of the room even existed, his attention only fixed on the boy who loved him, only him, so much. The boy he hurt and lied to.

“Baby, please. I’m so sorry, Tadashi. I’m sorry, I’ll-“

The laughter that came through the speaker was hysterical. It didn’t match that of the multiple previous times it had laughed through out the night, instead, it sounded more like a startled howl. One that came out of someone who had to process a joke before realizing it was actually funny. Come to think of it, the puppet had been rather quiet as Tsukki poured his heart out-

“Oh my god, what? Holy shit, I wasn’t talking about that. Fuck, I didn’t even know that!”

Tsukishima turned to look at the screen, his eyes wider than ever behind his thick frames. _What? That was all for nothing?_

“Jesus, kid. You really made my night, my god what a shit show. I swear, I wish I knew that one before I could have a lot of fun with that. You did my job for me!”

His shoulders hunched in defeat and he kept his eyes on the puppet, searching through the blue gaze in an attempt to find an answer. All he got were two empty beads glaring right back at him. 

Sugawara rose from his spot on the ground and decided he would be the one comfort Yamaguchi. He snaked his arms around him and let him sob into his chest, his hands staying by his face blocking his vision from catching a glimpse at Tsukki. 

He lifted a hand to stroke Yamaguchi’s hair, “What’s it talking about Tsukishima?” Suga didn’t allow his voice to be stronger than a whisper, fearing it may come out as venomous in pity for the boy in his arms. He understands, and he knows that just like himself, Yamaguchi may be hurt and insecure over this whole ordeal forever. There’s nothing like the feeling you get when the man you devote everything to turns around and gives their time to someone else. 

“Go on, four eyes. Tell the team what you really meant to say! I promise the sooner you say it the sooner you get to go do it. The toilet bowl awaits you after that big dinner.”

His once held breath was now shaky and heavy. He closed his eyes. He thought he did a good job of hiding it. He rejected food when he could and when he didn’t have any other choice he would wait long enough to go find a way to get rid of it. He even did what he could to do it away from public spaces.

Except for that one time.

_Noya shoveled food onto his tray, “Hurry up and eat! You’re not gonna have enough energy to the finish the game, string bean!”_

_He knew Nishinoya wouldn’t quit and then Daichi would start, so he ate it._

_But he couldn’t bear the thought of having to play with his stomach feeling so…full._

_He couldn’t wait till later and waited until the boys' washroom was completely empty to go in and push his fingers down his throat._

_He had sworn there was no one around. He even submitted off the swift sound of a door opening and closing when he walked out and saw that he was still on his own_. 

He was crying much harder now, his hands finding their way under his glasses to dig into his eyelids. 

“I-I don’t know why I do it. I-I can’t even look at myself. I-I just can’t.”

Every word was punctuated with a pant and no one was able to say anything. This revelation, although slightly less uncomfortable for them to witness, was much much worse, yet they all felt still in their spots, unable to move forward and console the crying boy. 

Asahi looked down at the floor, shame filling his eyes while he sat there silently. A slight tinge of guilt took over him as he realized… _he kind of knew_. He didn’t know the exact severity of the issue, but he always had eyes on Tsukishima though the younger never noticed. He saw the way he acted at the barbecues, lunch breaks, or when Ukai brought them snacks from the store during practices. There was always something… _there_ , but he figured he likely wasn’t the only one. 

Yamaguchi’s sobs stilled upon hearing about Tsukishima’s other secret. _How could he have not known?_ They have been by each other’s side for years, sometimes even going to the bathroom together even if they were just at the other’s house just for a source of company. 

Guilt that he wished would disappear pierced his skin and he squirmed himself out of Sugawara’s grip. He was so angry. He was hurt. He was in pain. But, now Tsukki was too, so what else was there for him to do but reach out and try to console him.

His hands never got to meet contact with Tsukishima’s once the voice spoke up again.

“Oh, and here he goes again. Running to the bean pole’s aid even after he’s betrayed you. Isn’t it obvious that he just wouldn’t do the same for you.”

Tsukishima’s breathing was heavy and rapid as he swiped at his cheeks, “T-that isn’t true!”

It was clear to anyone that Tsukishima had entered a state of panic and would likely not be able to hold himself up much longer.

Seeing that Yamaguchi was in no state to be caring for him, Daichi went and lead Tsukishima to sit down by Tanaka. 

Tanaka used his good arm to place it around Tsukishima. It happened so naturally, as if it happened times before, only it never had. This was the first sign of affection Tanaka had ever shown him, but it was only about time. Soon, Suga, Daichi, and Asahi would be gone, and someone had to learn to comfort these kids. That, and he felt horrible. Nobody deserves to go through what he now knew his teammate is. 

Tsukishima took to it, his current state looking for any possible sign of comfort. He tucked himself into Tanaka’s side and cried like no one-not even himself- has ever seen.

Yamaguchi’s eyes stayed on Tsukishima. They were filled with sorrow and it was clear that he wanted nothing more but to help him. He was about to move forward again, take to Tsukishima’s side, tell him, _I’m mad at you, but I’m here._

But of course, their newfound torturer had more to say.

“Look at you. After all he’s done. Yamaguchi Tadashi you are such a doormat. You’re gonna spend the rest of your life letting him and everyone just walk right over you. You’re nothing but a pushover who will let that kid drag you to hell with him if it meant you could stay by his side.”

Sugawara moved his hands up to push Yamaguchi’s head into his chest, shielding his eyes from the blue veil of insults.

“I think you’ve done enough to him,” his eyes burnt holes into the screen, “They’ve had more than enough. Leave it now. Please.”

A small snicker traveled its way through the speaker. 

“Ah, Sugawara you sweet prince, you win this time. How about I move on to the real doormat then, hm?”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “How about I move on to the real doormat then, hm?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Quick little heads up for the potential triggers in this chapter. There is mentions of homophobia as well as physical violence, so please be careful! I'm quite happy to see the reception this is getting, especially cause everytime I come up with some wild idea I question why I'm like this. As always, please stay safe and enjoy!

_“How about I move on to the real doormat then, hm?”_

“That’s enough!” Sugawara hadn’t even noticed that he screamed. If it weren’t for the startled stares of his peers around him, as well as the frightened questioning glance shot up to him from Yamaguchi who stayed rested in his arms, he would have thought he had said it casually and sternly. 

“My, that is so not like you, sweetheart.”

Sugawara cringed at the sound of the distorted voice declaring him as _sweetheart_. Whoever this was had a pretty vague idea for who Suga was. He tried to piece it together in his mind briefly, _who only sees the face value?_ But there were far too many possibilities to contemplate in the short time he had between that and confronting the obnoxious puppet.

“That’s enough,” Sugawara repeated himself, only quieter, trying to back himself away from his harsh demeanor, “Please. I know you couldn’t care any less, but please. Let us have a minute.”

He knew there was nothing he could do to stop it, but he figured it could at least stop momentarily. The moment just before had been too heavy to simply continue on and move to the next. Suga wanted for Yamaguchi and Tsukishima to at least talk, or even acknowledge one another before they had to witness what was likely to be another traumatic event.

“Hm.” It sounded as if the voice sympathized with Sugawara’s intentions, but that was obviously not the case. “Fine. Go ahead. But, when I say you’re done, you’re done.”

“Thank you.”

There was no _thank you_ deserved for the sick person behind the screen, but it was the least he could do to keep the temporary peace. 

Daichi nodded his head to the spot where Asahi stayed slumped against the wall, telling him to bring him there. To his left was Tanaka, still holding Tsukishima in his arms. 

It was a perfect distance for them not to be too close-just in case- but still a perfect area as a means of communication. 

Suga spoke softly into Yamaguchi’s hair, “Come, let me bring you to sit down.”

With his face still buried deeply into Sugawara’s chest, Yamaguchi allowed him to bring him to sit. The moment he made contact with the floor, Asahi placed an arm around his waist, just under where Suga kept his. 

The stronghold made Yamaguchi shudder for a moment, the large arm catching him off guard. Almost all physical contact he had in terms of affection was with Tsukishima whose entire body mass was probably the equivalent to Asahi’s muscular arm. 

Tsukishima peeked out from where his head stayed buried in Tanaka’s side and he peered over to where Yamaguchi was curled up between his two seniors. 

He had done that. After all the years of defending Yamaguchi from people who hurt him and made him do _that_ , made him cry curled in on himself, he was the one to have made it happen.

“Tadashi,” tears still stained his voice as he croaked out his name, “Baby.”

Yamaguchi hiccuped through his tears as the anger relished once again, pushing aside the new found pity he had found for him, “Why did you do it?” His voice was loud, almost a yell and it caught everyone off guard. To everyone else, this wasn’t like Yamaguchi, at least not the Yamaguchi they knew.

On the other hand, Tsukishima had seen this before. He had seen Yamaguchi lose it to the point that his throat was burning from all of the screaming. There weren’t many moments of passion like that for Tadashi, but there was a trend for when there was. That trend was Tsukishima, the only person that could light a fire in Yamaguchi, no matter what the context. 

“Tell me why you did it. Is he more attractive than me? Do you like him?”

“Of course I don’t like him, I like you, I-I love you, I was just-“

Kei knew how bad it must’ve looked, not even just to Yamaguchi, but to everyone. In front of the team-and anyone, really- Tsukishima could be chillingly cold to the smaller, telling him to shut up or brushing off his pats on the back of encouragement, but if anyone could see him behind closed doors, when there was no one else in sight, well, they would probably gag at how overly clingy and lovey he could be.

When sat in his room watching a movie, Yamaguchi sitting in the spot in front of him between his legs, Kei would not be watching the movie. He would be watching that side view he had of the angle of Tadashi’s face as the light from the screen hit it at every change of scene.

If Yamaguchi fell asleep before him, Tsukishima would stay awake, gently patting his hair and kissing his face. His acts of affections were barely there, as to not wake him, but those moments were his favorites. Yamaguchi couldn’t see him or hear him, any fear of rejection that he knew damn well would never actually happen was gone, and he could just be completely honest.

Whilst Yamaguchi's head was rested on Tsukishima’s pillow, Tsukishima would lean forward and whisper into his ear, _“You’re so important, I love you.”_

When Yamaguchi wouldn’t even stir, Tsukishima would giggle and speak even more softly and gut-wrenchingly cheesy. _“You’re all the stars in the sky.”_

But no one would ever know, no one would ever see it. Because all they saw was a shrug and a blank face every time Yamaguchi ran toward him to share some exciting news or a random fact he heard from a team member.

  
“You were just what?” Yamaguchi wasn’t yelling anymore. He sounded helpless as his voice broke and his breath shook.

“It just felt…different.”

_Different_ may not have sounded good, but it was the only word Kei could find. He loved Yamaguchi. He loved him so much and intended to spend the rest of his life with him even if it meant disapproving parents and judgemental stares. 

The thing was, much like Yamaguchi, Tsukishima was frighteningly insecure. He had a hard time looking in the mirror and not finding a spot to judge. A spot that he hated. Sometimes, he would even bring it forth to Yamaguchi, who would shake his head and look at him with stunned eyes. _“You’re always so beautiful to me.”_

And that was it. No matter what, Tsukishima would always be beautiful to him. _No matter what_. But what about in general? Without the biased eyes of someone who has known him and loved him for years, was he really beautiful? Or was he just ugly and all his fears and insecurities were accurate but no one would ever tell him because they loved him so much and saw through a rose-colored lens? 

That’s why, when Kuroo approached him, older, taller, playful, popular, talented, Kuroo, he thought, _hey, maybe I might not actually be all that bad._

If a boy who didn’t know him all that well, saw him and took a liking to him, that must mean something… _right?_

“Different? What, do I bore you or something?”

“No, baby, no. Not at all. It was just…” he choked on a sob, “It was validating, Tadashi. I don’t know how else to put it. But there was never any love there, there was never really even any like. I just felt good knowing that someone thought something of me.”

“And it’s not enough that I do?”

Tsukishima stuttered on his words, “N-No, it isn’t like that. You make me feel amazing baby, but god, I can’t explain it, it was just…it wasn’t that it was new and exciting it was that it was _different_. That’s all. I won’t ever do it again, I swear it.”

Tanaka patted Tsukishima’s back, making him turn to look at him. His eyes were awkward yet apologetic and he messed up his hair, trying to bring some sort of lightheartedness to the situation. “Just stop, for now, Tsukishima. Take it from me, you’re only gonna make it worse.”

Sugawara nodded and shifted slightly so Asahi could take over the comforting sanction of Yamaguchi’s distress. He figured that the bigger, stronger, hold might make him feel a little bit safer. A little bit _different_ , Sugawara thought bitterly. 

Daichi sighed to himself as he observed the scene. He hated that he understood just what Tsukishima had meant. That _different_ feeling that comes from that _somebody else_. The ‘somebody else’ was someone new, a foreign taste that takes you by surprise because _wait, why would they like me?_ You can’t help but strive off of that attention and will do whatever it takes to keep it on you. People will be hurt, but you’ll certainly feel just a little bit better. 

“Alright,” the voice chimed in smugly, “Time’s up. Let’s get back to business, although I must say Tsukishima digging himself an even deeper grave was quite entertaining to watch.”

Tanaka refused to let Kei’s eyes meet the puppet on the screen as he pushed his head back into his chest. He felt sick as the lighting of the screen adjusted, making the blue an even brighter, more neon state. 

“Anyways, where was I? Oh, yes! The real doormat! Hinata, dear, it’s your time to shine.”

Hinata flinched upon hearing his name. He started to feel his hands shake, but he tucked them firmly behind his back, entangling them in one another.

_C’mon Hinata,_ he fought with himself internally, _Where’s that confidence from before? Don’t just stand here._

The issue was, it was _different_ now. He wasn’t singling out the blue puppet, the blue puppet was singling out him. It was officially his turn, not just the brief ‘ah, whatever’ he seemed to have been getting before. 

He hated himself more than anything when he stumbled over his words through his false courage, “W-what makes me a doormat? I-I’m not a doormat.”

The voice laughed, “Please, this kid has a permanent kick me sign on his back and he thinks he’s not a doormat. Which one of you has been hyping him up? Was it you, Sugawara? Telling him that he’s amazing and talented and good enough? Cause it sure as hell hasn’t been Kageyama.”

_Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck._

The mantra played over and over again in Kageyama’s head. The last thing he needed after the night of being picked on no matter whose situation was brought forth was to be completely in the spotlight, especially amongst… Hinata.

Hinata’s face turned red in embarrassment. Yeah, sometimes Sugwara did tell him he was good and talented. So what? He was. 

“W-why would it even h-have to be Kageyama? I c-can only feel that I’m good enough if he says so?”

Despite his constant stammering, his words were strong and meaningful. They were courageous and brought forth the little lion everyone knew Hinata kept hidden under the skin of his small frame. 

“Because you always seek his approval, of course. Anyone could see the way you look over at him every time you hit the damn ball to check if he was looking.”

Hinata’s face was now red with a shyness that came from something along the lines of being found out. Although he felt sorry that his little partner in crime over there was frightened, he was glad that Kageyama was frozen in place with his eyes locked on the screen. 

“You’ll always just be second best, Hinata Shoyo.”

“F-fuck you!” Kageyama managed to spit out. 

It was the most pathetic sound he had ever let come out of his mouth and everyone had taken notice of it. By some means, he was shy, reserved, never really talking unless he had to or if he was angry and had to yell at someone, but when he was, he was strong and stern. This embarrassing little stand up made him want to curl up on himself and die. 

“Ah,” The voice sounded pleased, if not impressed by Kageyama’s outburst, “I thought I would have had to teased this little firecracker a little more to get a rise out of you”

Hinata slowly peered over at Kageyama, the fear of making eye contact with him at the moment he was chosen to be next on the chopping block at a high. Thankfully, no eye contact was made, but his face was just as flushed.

“Look at you all flushed up. God, you’re more in love with him than I thought!”

Tanaka’s head snapped to look at the stunned first year. If he had a drink in his mouth, he would have choked and spit out because _Kageyama is what?_

Even Tsukishima and Yamaguchi put their sorrowful states aside and removed their heads from where they rested on their peers' bodies to look at the boy. That just couldn’t be true.

“Hey, Hinata you little shit. I mentioned how you always check to see if he’s looking, well he is. You may not notice, he may always look away, but honey his eyes are always there burning into your head.”

Kageyama whimpered softly to himself. No one heard it, but it was a sound that could be imagined by the simple tragic face he was wearing. What he had been trying to avoid the entire night had been affirmed. He was found out.

Suga shifted uncomfortably where he sat, peering over at Daichi to see if he had any intentions of making any moves in their aid. He seemed just as stunned as the rest of them, staying in his spot and trying to process what the puppet had revealed. _Maybe he heard wrong?_

Daichi knew Sugawara had a thing for him, he knew that Noya and Tanaka were competitive, he knew Asahi had to have had a fucked up child-although he was taken aback by the pregnancy incident- he also knew that Tsukishima was a bit cold and careless, bumps in his relationship were inevitable, but this, _this?_ This just couldn’t be true. None of it added up. 

“N-no.” 

That was all Hinata managed to say weakly. The main target to his left had nothing to say as he stood taller than him in shock and embarrassment. He would have to somehow take the lead.

“No? Why no? ‘Cause you guys fight all the time? That’s just because he’s a scared little gay boy who hates himself and refuses to admit his feelings. He’s aggressive toward you because you scare him. I bet you always wanted to hear that you little shit. You scare Kageyama.”

Hinata scrunched up his nose and rubbed his eyes roughly with his hands balled up in fists. He liked Kageyama, he always has, but there was no way in hell he liked him back. It wasn’t possible. 

“Oh, how that little gay boy loves you.”

That struck a nerve that had been previously hidden by his uneasiness. Kageyama’s pool of shame turned into one of anger as he growled back the voice. He had done some _thinking_ …he could stand up.

“Shut the fuck up.”

A small audible gasp was heard through the speakers alongside many accompanying ones from his peers around the room. Just seconds ago he looked like he was ready to burst into tears, but now his eyes were dark and venomous. 

Nishinoya leaned over to Sugawara, “Is it illegal to strangle a puppet?” His voice was only a whisper reserved for Suga to hear, and in taking the hint he returned with the same tone.

“I don’t know, but if it is he’s probably gonna go to jail.”

“Wow, look at this guy! Please, if you could see my face you’d be cowering away like you always do. Here’s an idea! Little red come on over here, I know you don’t believe that he’s into you cause you two brawl, but watch if I make him put a hand on you for no real reason. Let’s see how much he hates you now.”

Hinata gulped. The memories of his fights with Kageyama, whether they be verbal or physical,stay locked into his mind at all times of the day. There was always ruthlessness in Kageyama’s eyes when he quarreled with him, but in his pondering, he realized that there was also something else…something.. _different_. It was pain. Kageyama was in pain. 

He decided he has seen enough of his teammate’s pain. He didn’t want to see it anymore. The only way to make that happen would be to step up now. To channel that inner fire he burns up with when he’s out on the court, when someone doubts him, when he’s forgotten about. Find it and light it right up to get Kageyama out of this situation as quickly as possible. 

The voice taunted through the speakers, clearly happy with the official anger-driven rise he got out of the raven-haired boy.

“C’mon Kageyama. You’re always fighting with him outside of here, so why not just fight him now?”

Kageyama gulped hard and shook his head. He wasn’t going down without a fight, and that fight had nothing to do with getting physical with Hinata.

Hinata watched and grunted in frustration. Where was the boy he knew in the practice room who was so annoyed and fed up with him all the time? They’re alone in a room with a literal bomb and suddenly he wants to be soft? He would deal with that whole other feelings issue later, but right now he was determined to do what he had to do to get them out of there. 

Hinata stood in front of Kageyama, grabbing hold of his arms. The action made Kageyama’s eyes widen as he stared down at the boy in front of him. 

He was nodding at him, trying to convey to him that whatever had to happen, it was okay, but Kageyama’s head would only respond with the shaking motion of _no._

“You have to,” Hinata’s voice was soft, “C’mon, you saw what happened with Tanaka and Nishinoya, and they’re just fine now.”

Nishinoya glanced over at Tanaka whose arm was still bleeding considerably through the shirt he had wrapped around it. _Not just fine, but I guess I know what he’s trying to say._

The voice’s words echoed off the walls of the hazed blue room, “Clock is ticking, kids.”

Hinata let go of Kageyama’s arms and took a step back to have his full frame in his vision. He tried to make sure his face and eyes spoke to him. That they told him he wasn’t mad at him or weirded out or anything. He thought he was being comforting with the way he met his eye-view, but Kageyama only began to cry.

They had been surprised when Tsukishima and Yamaguchi were crying, but for the boys in the Karasuno volleyball club, this was so painfully _different._

Kageyama was loud as his heaves and sobs left the room’s color looking like he was the one who projected it. He looked and sounded like a blue boy who belonged inside a blue room with blue clothes and a blue cloud above his head.

“Daichi,” before he had any power to stop it, he found himself pleading, “Sugawara.” He sobbed and called out for everyone in the room. _Someone. Anyone. Just make it leave me alone._ He even called out for Tsukishima, as if even on a good day the latter would stand up to help him. Had he been looking his way, he would have seen that Tsukki stared at him in a pity that read, _I wish I could help,_ but he didn’t and Kageyama would never see the sympathy he harbored for him. 

Daichi had to look away. He knew there was nothing he could do. Sugawara already bargained and got them their time of mediation. Now, all they could do is sit and watch, and intervene if something got to be too much.

“Time, boys. It’s precious.”

The sound of the voice made Hinata snap as he resorted to the last thing he had wanted to do. If Kageyama wasn’t going to hit him, he would make him _want_ to hit him. 

“What are you acting like this for, huh? You’re too good to go against me? Or are you scared that I’ll kick your ass.”

Kageyama stared at him with wonderment filing his tear-stained wide eyes.

“Worried that your pride will be ruined after I beat you in front of everyone?”

Nishinoya could see what he was doing and in all honesty, despite all the love he had for Shoyo, this was probably the most intelligent thing he had ever seen him do. 

Kageyama’s voice was cracking, “Hinata, what?-“

“Scared that everyone will make fun of you after because you were a pussy?”

“Hinata, please stop.”

“What? Why do you have to act like the king of the court now? Is that all you are? I thought you changed?”

Kageyama’s sobs only got louder, but his arms stayed rested at his sides, hands not even balled up into ready fists. Hinata sighed, it wasn’t working.

Here was the _last_ last resort.

Hinata swung his arm back and punched Kageyama directly in his nose, causing him to stumble back into the wall and clutch his face. 

Another collective gasp could be heard around the room and Asahi put a hand up to his mouth the shield any more surprised sounds from escaping. 

Kageyama stared back at Hinata, hand over his nose. His fingers began to be painted red as blood flowed out from the two small holes. _Damn, he could pack a punch._

“Woohoo! Little Shoyo they should start calling you Rocky!” 

Hinata refused to take any compliments from the voice. This was the enemy, it didn’t matter how much of an ego booster someone’s approval is, this person was not for him, they were against him. When he moved forward to place another blow onto Kageyama’s stomach, he told himself he was not fighting Kageyama, he was fighting the puppet who was threatening them with their lives and hurting them in every way possible. 

Kageyama whimpered as he doubled over. He looked up at Shoyo, infinitely hurt that the boy was doing to him what he was dead set on not starting in the first place. Kageyama had no drive to lay a finger on Hinata in that room and he regretted every moment he ever did, so why was Hinata being so merciless?

Hinata’s eyes drilled back into his, and _oh, there it was_. Kageyama grabbed onto the wall and stood up on shaky legs. It was a game. They loved games. This time, despite that they had to hurt each other, they were playing together, not against each other. All they had to do was a little roughhousing, but they would win.

“Don’t let it fucking win,” Kageyama swore he never heard such drive in Hinata’s voice.

With a nod and soft, _I_ _’m so sorry_ , Kageyama smashed his fist into the side of Hinata’s face. 

“Jesus,” Tanaka looked away. The sight of the small boy reeling to the wall was morbid for him. He could only imagine what his and Noya’s escapade looked like to everyone else. 

Kageyama couldn’t help the fact that he was still crying as he sent another hit to Shoyo’s face. It hurt him to have to hurt him. Especially with his feelings being put in the limelight. _How did this make him look?_

Hinata shoved him back roughly, bringing up a knee and smashing it into his stomach. Kageyama hunched over and grabbed hold of it briefly before swinging his elbow into Hinata’s cheek.

“D-Daichi, we can’t.” Sugawara was horrified. When the pair had first fought, he hadn’t witnessed it, but he was damn sure it wasn’t anything like this. 

“Sh.” Daichi placed a hand on Suga’s shoulder to stop him from making any attempts of intervening, “We can’t do anything.”

With Kageyama still slightly doubled over, Hinata brought his knee up and hit him in the chest. The blow made Kageyama lose his breath and he coughed as he tried to regain it.

This all hurt Hinata just as much, but deep down he knew, once there was enough blood, once there were enough tears, they could stop. 

Kageyama was stood up straight now and he lunged forward, sending a punch to Hinata’s eye that was sure to leave him a bloody bruise that would last weeks. 

With a hand over his eye, Hinata used his free dominant one to make contact with Kageyama’s mouth. He hadn’t realized how hard he had gone. He didn’t even think it was all that possible considering he had no other hand stabling him. All it had felt like was a lazy and sloppy knock to his face.

But as Kageyama’s head turned on the impact, a small white article flew from his mouth and onto the ground.

They stopped for a moment, everyone stunned into silence as they stared at what had met the ground. His tooth. _His fucking tooth._

Okay, now he was mad. 

He grabbed Hinata by his shoulders and mocked the previous attack he had used on him, elbow to the chest. 

Hinata was sent to his knees, but he used to the opportunity to grab hold of Kageyama’s ankles and send him down with him. 

Kageyama landed on his back and Hinata crawled to the spot on top of him and grabbed hold of the collar of his shirt.

He spoke quietly, to him and him alone, “Forgive me for what I’m about to do.”

Kageyama shook his head, “Don’t even worry about it.” It sounded more like a pant than a stable sentence.

With one hand holding Kageyama up by his shirt, the other was in a fist repeatedly knocking him in the face. He closed his eyes as the punches weakened him, the taste of blood in his mouth even more bitter as it continued to pool with more.

At this point, everyone who once wanted to look was no longer looking, their heads turned away or their faces buried in the nearest person. Everyone except for Suga, who watched in terror and shook his head.

“That’s enough!” He couldn’t bear it much longer. He felt selfish for crying as he wasn’t victim to this attack, but he couldn’t watch them suffer much longer, “P-please, no more!”

The voice was laughing hysterically as it had been for the majority of the encounter, “Okay, okay! What a show! Go ahead and take a breather!”

Breathless, Hinata tossed himself off of Kageyama, throwing himself onto the floor next to him. With action finally able to be taken, Daichi grabbed Kageyama and rested him up against the wall, hoping it would help him regain some sort of awareness. 

Sugawara made his way next to where Hinata lay and placed his hand on his forehead. Hinata knew that Suga's anxiety was high and he was terribly worried for him, but through his exhaustion he knew that Kageyama needed more help than he did.

With a weak lift of the arm, he shot Sugawara a thumbs up, to which he earnt back a breathless laugh and a small smile. 

Both Tanaka and Asahi shifted the boys they held in their arms so that there was as much room as possible for Kageyama to breathe and come to some of his senses.

Nishinoya frowned as he watched the blood poor from Kageyama’s mouth and nose. Although he didn't want to ever lay eyes on that torturing device ever again, he lifted one of the blades from the spot on the floor it was disregarded to earlier.

With the blade, he cut of a large chunk of the bottom of his shirt, leaving himself in a makeshift uneven crop top he would never be caught dead wearing in the broad daylight. 

“Daichi, here.” He handed it over and Daichi accepted it with earnest, gently pressing it up against the bloody spots of Kageyama’s face.

To let him and everyone know he was awake and well, alive, he let out a soft, “Hm,” at the contact of the cloth.

“Kageyama,” Hinata called out, his breath still winded as he lay on the floor finding his composure, “I’m sorry.”

Kageyama finally managed intelligible words out of his bloodied mouth.

“It’s okay. I’m fine.”

As he spoke, he gently shook his head to avoid making himself dizzy.

“I know exactly who is doing this to us.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I know exactly who is doing this to us.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I have a pretty busy next few days ahead, so I thought I would give you guys the chapter one day earlier than usual! I must say I'm a little nervous about this one, so I hope you all enjoy!

_“I know exactly who is doing this to us.”_

A sharp scoff was heard through the speaker as the person behind the screen-who in Kageyama’s mind was now _found out_. Just like he and his feelings had been. _Right back at ya, bitch-_ grew immediately agitated at the boys one sentence.

“Like Hell you do.”

Sugawara stared at him in disbelief. Just a moment ago he was laying on his back getting beaten senseless and now he was sitting up against the wall and suddenly held all of the answers to the crooked circumstances they had been forced to spend the night in.

He kept his tone soft and understanding although he was slightly concerned that the younger may have just gotten really hurt and was losing his head, “What are you talking about, Kageyama?”

Kageyama closed his eyes and a small quirk of his lips lifted as a breathless chuckle escaped his throat. “Where should I even begin?”

Hinata stayed put on the floor where Kageyama once lay, Nishinoya joining him at his side. He put a hand up to his head. _Did he get hit too hard? Was he imagining shit now?_

Kageyama looked over at Sugawara. “There was a notebook, right?”

Sugawara stared at him, his eyes blown wide in concern that he was no longer able to hide. He couldn’t find any words to respond to the boy, the fear that he may say something that would scare him or piss him off forcing his mouth shut. He simply nodded, allowing Kageyama to continue.

“You must’ve dropped it somewhere. When was the last time you saw it?”

Suga shook his head to himself. He had been thinking about this earlier. He had lost it at a game they played earlier that year. 

“I don’t know, Kageyama. It was just some game…”

_A game they played earlier that year._

Kageyama's eyes were opened now as he stared back into Sugawara's. There was a tinge of light in his eyes that Sugawara couldn’t differentiate as anything other than _scary_. These were the same eyes of the boy who took a serve to the head. The eyes that knew that he was right and the other person was wrong.

“What game was it? How many games did we have, really?”

Suga looked down at the floor as he recollected his memory of his rollercoaster of a final year to end his high school career. There weren’t many games at the beginning of the season, Kageyama was certainly right about that. There was the first game with Date Tech, but that was before the journal was ever even purchased. Then there was the game with Aoba Johsai and-

That was the last time he saw it.

His eyes must have given away his realization because Kageyama chuckled at him before turning his head slowly and looking over at Tanaka.

“Look at his arm guys. Tanaka has a fucking S carved into his arm for fucks sake.”

Tanaka’s eyes were blank as he stared into a plain spot on the floor as if it was a portal into complete nothingness. He had been branded by an opponent. And he had no idea it had even happened.

His voice was above a whisper and his eyes didn’t leave the ground. “Seijoh.”

Nishinoya’s eyes widened as he looked over at all of them. No one’s eyes met his as they all peered down in realization. He cleared his throat, “It was at the game with Seijoh when I had called my mom and told her about my plans…”

He trailed off in shame. There was a shame in both having to recount the way he was trying to ‘abandon’ his team as well as his carelessness to have spoken so freely in public. Let alone grounds belonging to a group of people who weren’t exactly the biggest fan of him. 

Tsukishima was still shaking as he met Noya’s eyes. He was the only one to dare to do so.

“T-that’s where I threw up.” Eyes all around the room, especially Yamaguchi’s watery ones moved to Tsukishima, “At…Aoba..Joshai.”

There were tears in Asahi’s eyes as he choked out what sounded like both a laugh and a sob. It _was_ both and could be confirmed with a quick glance at the bitterly smiling tear-stained face.

“That girl I was with,”

Nishinoya was especially all ears now, turning to look at his face. Asahi now dared himself to look up at him. There was no longer anything off the table. Everything had been laid out. There was nothing anyone didn’t know.

“She went to Aoba Johsai.”

Daichi let out a bitter laugh of his own as he turned around and ran a hand through his hair. All of this was placed directly in front of them, yet nobody decided to dig deeper into their thoughts and remember the moments that could have led them to this realization much earlier. 

He cursed himself quietly too, not dismissing his own absent mind from the fault. How couldn’t he have seen through the antagonizing thrown towards Sugawara and the recurring ‘glass of water’ phrase as if he didn’t feel his blood boil in his veins every time he was faced in front of Seijoh and heard the sing-song tune of “ _Refreshing-kun~_ ”?

Hinata looked back down at the ground, speaking quietly, “And it’s been going at Kageyama all night.”

Kageyama pointed a weak hand over to Hinata and nodded, _you got it_.

“See that,” his voice was weak and pitiful, but the smirk on his face was enough to know that he felt it to be loud, strong, and just as condescending as the voice had been, “You’ve been on me all night.”

Kageyama spat out a laugh that made him clutch his side in pain. He leaned back against the wall and huffed, “You’re losing at your own game.”

He stared at the screen for a moment, looking into the eyes of the puppet for what it now was. Not a puppet. But a man, _a boy_ , who liked to control everyone as if they were puppets themselves. There was such painful irony there. The pictured puppet was the one to be the puppeteer in the end. But not anymore.

Kageyama stayed quiet and everyone watched in a gloom of nerves as they awaited a response. He was doing the same and was rather shocked to hear nothing but white noise from the speaker. He knew what to do now.

“Oikawa.”

There was a swift second left of silence before a small switch can be heard and the ever so familiar unmasked voice sang through the speakers.

“So what? You caught me.”

Asahi shivered. The voice was no longer morphed or warped, but Oikawa Toru’s normal voice sounded as cynical and frightening as ever. How could this be the same boy they once played against?

Kageyama’s nasty smirk was still plastered across his face as he felt a sense of pride rush over his bruised and bloodied body. 

Oikawa’s next words acted as a sharp slap that wiped that smirk right off of him.

“You think I care? Do you think that will make me stop? I’m done now because you figured out who I was? Do you think I’m just gonna let you waltz right out?”

The invisible slap took its quick effect as Kageyama’s face fell. He was confident for a moment, but now he had to think. Sure, he could beat him in sport anyday, but the upper hand that Okaiwa still holds over him as an upperclassman and even once a schoolmate is a hurdle he can’t jump over. 

Hinata shuffled across the ground and settled by Kageyama’s feet. When their eyes met, that rush of confidence was back, though nowhere near as strong. His mouth couldn’t bear to lift itself back into its smile, but his eyes matched the same fiery passion that Hinata’s did. 

He couldn’t smile, but he could let out a brush of air in the form of a chuckle as a realization hit him. Sure, he knew he was interested in Hinata and that requited or not, that nagging little crush would always be there, but there was much more to that. Hinata was a power source for him. He was like a charging station and Kageyama was the battery walking out on its last limb. When tensions were high, when he was unsure, or when he was down after a shitty play, Hinata’s driven and unbreakable eyes brought him right back to where he had to be.

His brief moment of calmness in his new discovery was quickly interrupted by Oikawa’s rather hysteric voice.

“I am not done with any of you yet! Don’t get all confident now! I can press this fucking button any moment I feel like it!”

In the same way that it didn’t sound like him, it just did. _It so painfully did sound like him_. The boy with the high and mighty God complex ego who turns to tears when he doesn’t get his way. The one who had to pretend like he had everything when there was just so much more that he wanted and even needed that he never got. The boy that worked so hard, and..for what?

Kageyama was the only one who felt most comfortable speaking up, after all, he was the one who spent the most time around him, especially in his tender years when he was still growing and learning in every aspect. 

“So what are you gonna do then, Oikawa?”

“Just shut up, you little shit! You all just sit there and shut up! Not like you can go anywhere!”

A small click could be heard from the speaker, and that was all the boys of Karasuno would hear from Oikawa Toru in his role as the Blue Puppet for the next little while. 

* * *

  
From a wheeled chair in a backroom of Tokyo’s Blue Puppet Escape Rooms, Oikawa Toru smashed his fist into the desk he was sat at.

The room was dark, only the lights of the cameras and monitors shining on his crookedly beautiful face. He was careful to keep them all off as he entered earlier that night, awaiting the moment he could turn them all back on and _watch._ He had even kept himself quiet and hidden from the careless young volleyball player working the desk who was far to enveloped in a video game sitting in his hands. 

Kenma hadn’t been paying attention when Oikawa entered hidden amongst a loud laughing group of friends. There were almost sixteen of them and from behind the crowd, even his own tall form went unnoticed. 

Oikawa easily snuck past, and well, Blue Puppet Escape Rooms doesn’t seem to be careful enough to lock any of their empty rooms.

Little did any of the young carefree people who went about to enjoy their night know, there was a tool ready to knock them all dead in an instant strapped under every last one of those room’s prop tables. 

With a click of his tongue, he removed his glasses from his face, rubbing his eyes with his hands. _How come there is nothing that can ever go right in his life?_

He rubbed at his temples as his head pounded from the harsh light shining directly into his face. Oikawa would never give the team of players sitting in that room the satisfaction of knowing his lingering feelings of defeat, let alone a defeat that has yet to happen. 

But, ironically, _god,_ he was just so tensed up and anxious from being placed on the spot and being so-called out like that. Everyone sitting in that room had someone right by their side, and despite Oikawa’s preset mind that told him they would all have been turned against each other, after almost every revelation there was someone for his target to turn to.

But who did he have as he sat hunched over in the dark backroom of the Tokyo funhouse he drove a long haul out to for the sake of tormenting a few high schoolers? It was quiet as he had switched off all of his wires and microphones. Seeing them consoling each other through the screen was enough, he had no interest in hearing it too. 

_You’re alone Oikawa. You will always be al-_

The door creaked open and before Oikawa could turn around, a firm hand was placed onto his shoulder. It was that oh so familiar hand whose touch made him melt and seemed to remove all of the stress and tension left in his body.

“Iwa-chan, what are you doing back inside?”

Iwaizumi glared down at him from his spot behind him. He knew he had to take advantage of the situation where Oikawa wasn’t facing him. He could tell just from the way he was sitting that he was in distress, and if he was going to get through to him, he’d have to hide the disappointment hidden within himself.

He quickly made his face go blank as he placed his hand on Oikawa’s cheek and allowed for the boy to turn his position in the chair. Facing him, Oikawa nuzzled the side of his face into Iwaizumi’s hand, his eyes closing as he experienced the only comfort he had ever truly known. 

Iwaizumi sighed to himself, _how could he let him turn out this way?_ And even more importantly, _why does he continue to follow him through it all?_

Oikawa seemed lost in the comforting moment of affection but was soon brought back to his senses and furrowed his eyebrows together despite not lifting his head from Iwaizumi’s hand.

“No, seriously, why did you come back in? Where’s Kenma?”

He chewed the inside of his cheek and brushed Oikawa’s hair away from his face with his other hand. He continued to stroke down the other side of his face gently, working even harder to make the boy soften up.

“He’s knocked out and tied up outside, you don’t have to worry about that. I came in to check on you.”

“Mm.” Oikawa returned back to losing himself in the moment, being further calmed by the presence of Iwaizumi’s hand.

With Oikawa’s eyes still being closed, Iwaizumi took the opportunity to look over at the cameras belonging to the room the boys resided in. 

* * *

  
Nishinoya was chewing on the hanging skin on the corner of his thumb as he began to pace around the room. The waiting and the silence and the uncertainty were making his limbs jitter to the point that he couldn’t sit in place anymore. He felt childish and whiny, but he couldn't help the new sensation that came from uncovering the person who had been doing this. 

“What now?” his voice was nearly muffled as he continued to gnaw at his skin, “We just sit here with no direction?”

  
Daichi sighed from where he sat slumped against the wall. “Calm down Noya, I’m sure we just freaked him out a bit. Not like he’s just gonna take off, I think he made that very clear.”

Nishinoya began to bounce in place and Hinata had to close his eyes and look away, the sight making his pounding head spin more than it already was.

“B-but I have to go pee.”

Daichi rubbed a hand over his face. At that point, everyone in the room was exhausted. In looking over, Daichi was pretty sure that Tsukishima had fallen asleep with his head tucked into Tanaka’s side, who also had his head thrown back and his eyes closed.

“You guys alive over there?”

Tanaka’s voice was a mere grumble, “Yeah, we’re fine.”

Yamaguchi chewed his lip and pulled himself away from Asahi. “I’m sorry.” The only sound his voice could create was a shy whisper. In his hysteric state, clinging to Asahi seemed only natural, but now that things have calmed down, he felt awkward to have held onto the older boy for dear life with his head too far gone to rationalize. 

“It’s okay.” Asahi gave him a bright and gentle smile that made all of Yamaguchi’s worries of judgment fade away. “You can hug me anytime.”

“I think I’m going a little stir crazy now too,” Sugawara muttered as he watched Nishinoya pacing around the room. He was scared and growing even more so by the second. On top of his fear, there was a developing impatience that was enough to make him turn his body and pound on the wall. 

The once sleeping Tsukishima flinched awake as the loud sound filled the room. When he looked over and saw his upperclassman beating against the wall, his flustered and panicked instinct told him to do the same. With his worn out fist, he began to beat on the wall in unison with Sugawara.

Kageyama closed his eyes as the noise made his head pound, “He can’t hear you.”

Nishinoya clenched his fists, “Maybe he can and he’s just ignoring us.” Without a thought other than his desperation to get the fuck out of there, he began to scream, “Hey! Hey, asshole! We’re fucking done in here let us out!”

* * *

  
Iwaizumi watched as the boys silently beat on the wall and screamed toward the camera. As he was about to simply shake his head and look away, he noticed Tanaka and his bloody arm, as well as the bloody stray pieces of clothing left on the ground. Not to mention the bloody face of the two first years who were both clearly badly injured from he could only imagine what.

He inhaled sharply and held his breath, _what the fuck had happened while he was outside?_

Oikawa’s face stayed nestled into the cup of his hand and he sighed as he placed his hand over his.

While his face was content, Iwaizumi’s face was filled with sadness and concern, because how could such a sweet and beautiful looking boy be acting out so recklessly?

“Toru.”

Oikawa’s eyes opened slowly at the use of his given name. It was spoken so softly and gently and with such affection that Oikawa was more than surprised to have met such horrified and angry eyes.

He grabbed hold of Iwaizumi’s hands and met his gaze with eyes equally as concerned. They held such innocence and questioning as if he was completely oblivious to what was going on behind the cameras. He looked as if he were sitting alone with him in his living room, talking about a rough day, not the fact that he had a couple badly injured fellow volleyball players sat in a few rooms over.

“What is it, Hajime? Are you okay?”

“I should be the one asking you that question.”

Oikawa tilted his head and squeezed his hands gently before realizing the direction the conversation was to go. His entire expression changed. From that sweet, innocent, and wondering face, he turned cold, determined, and angry. He let go of Iwaizumi’s hands and placed his own on the armrests of the chair.

“What are you talking about?”

Iwaizumi was at a loss. He knew that Oikawa had been a bit off his rocker lately, but not to this extent. 

He tried to lighten the mood softly by letting out a breathy chuckle, “What am I talking about?” He kept a faint smile on his face that he hoped more than anything read, _I’m on your side, talk to me_. “There are some kids in there bleeding really bad, Oikawa.”

Oikawa snapped away from him, making the chair turn to face the monitors in the process. He started at the cameras and watched the boys as they suffered in a way that was silent on his end.

“That’s the whole point.”

Iwaizumi shook his head, this was not the boy that he originally agreed to do some crazy shit to some kids with. As a matter of fact, the whole concept of strapping a bomb to some tables was fucking insanity to him, but he did it. And why? He just couldn’t leave Oikawa’s side. He didn’t trust him enough to let him do anything on his own, not lately. 

So, yeah, it was a bad idea. A horrible one, at that. But Iwaizumi would have never anticipated this. Wasn’t the threat of a bomb enough? Why did there have to be bloodshed?

“Toru.”

The soft tone was enough to make Oikawa slightly crumble once again, only this time his easy form of submission angered him, leading him to lash out rather than give in to the potential comfort.

He smashed his hand back down on the desk, “What?! What do you want?!’

Iwaizumi reached forward, his hands ready to do what they could to calm the boy he thought he knew so well down. “You’re going too far now. It’s time to stop.”

Oikawa’s eyes widened and he swatted Iwaizumi’s hands away before they could make any contact with his body. While Iwaizumi knew what he had to do, Oikawa knew what it was he was doing. He may have been a little bit punch drunk from hits that he witnessed rather than experienced, but he was not stupid.

“I’m not done yet.”

“You are.”

“I’m not!”

“Toru, you are.”

The boiling kettle inside Oikawa’s head began to screech as its top was blown off and his anger took over. The one he was angry at in that moment was Hajime, and that was something that they could both be aware of. But Oikawa would never dare to take out his wrath on him and he wasn’t sure why. It could have had to do with the fact that Iwaizumi was the only person he ever had. Or maybe that Iwaizumi was the only person who ever _really wanted to have him_. Nonetheless, Iwaizumi was out of the question, but the not-so-innocent boys of Karasuno were not. 

He roughly switched back on all of the sound so that the room’s speaker now made the loud banging and yelling of the boys audible. It drove Oikawa crazy.

He grabbed hold of his microphone.

“Shut up!”

* * *

  
_“Shut up!”_

In an instant the boys that had been causing the commotion halted. They turned to look at the screen as the puppet’s image had now come back to life, lighting up the room. 

Nishinoya, Sugawara, and Tsukishima, a trio that they never would have expected would exist, glanced at each other from the corners of their eyes. _Are we in trouble now?_

“I said that I wasn’t done and I’m fucking not!”

Asahi flinched at the sound of Oikawa's unfiltered angry voice. That one brief moment of anger was the most venomous and chilling thing he had heard through the speakers all night and he had been directly called out for his own past traumas. 

Sugawara’s guilty conscience kicked in as he moved on to blame himself for Asahi’s fright. He moved forward and took his hand, squeezing it gently as he awaited more from the puppet he now knew was one of his past opponents. 

Oikawa’s voice sounded flustered as he stumbled over his words, but his motive and direction were clearer than ever.

“Y-you guys remember why you chose this room?”

Sugawara stared down at the floor as he recollected the conversation at the front desk earlier that night. He looked up at the screen and met the eyes of the puppet, envisioning those of Oikawa’s and he spoke in a whisper loud enough for him to hear, “The safe.” 

“Bingo!” Oikawa yelled, making the whole room flinch this time. “You got it, Sugawara!” Yamaguchi was reluctant to look at the screen and tried to shield his ears away from the piercing speakers, but it didn’t take much for him to decipher that Oikawa sounded like he was crying, or panting, or both. 

“Got it as always! Hey, hey, captain!”

Daichi looked up to the screen and pointed to himself.

“I don’t see any other captains in the room!” His throat sounded as if it could be burned from the way he was screaming into the speaker. “Maybe some that should be, but at the end of the day there’s only one!”

Daichi closed his eyes, feeling plaguing guilt of his own. That question on whether or not he was deserving had always lingered and it was only affirmed by Oikawa’s words.

He did his best to stay calm and collected, and to somewhat prove his worth that he wasn’t even sure he had, “What can I do for you, Oikawa?”

Oikawa could be heard scoffing at the politeness before his scratchy voice appeared again.

“Go over to the safe, captain!”

Daichi obliged and got up from his spot on the ground. The entire room watched as he walked over to the safe, feeling as if he had been moving in slow motion. He stared at the silver rectangle mounted into the wall and the pin pad with the various digital numbers that awaited his attention. Now was his time to do his team good, to show them that he could be good, that he could help.

But he couldn’t. He didn’t know the code. He stared at the silver box, waiting for any sort of instruction. He felt the eyes of the puppet drilling into his back and he knew deep down that Oikawa was leaving him to wait on purpose. He wanted him to feel the shame and embarrassment of not being able to take charge for his team. 

“What’s wrong, captain? Don’t know the code?”

Daichi closed his eyes and his jaw clenched on instinct at the teasing. “No, I don’t. Can you tell me what it is?”

“No. I can’t. But Sugawara can.”

Sugawara’s eyes widened as he stared at the screen. _What did he know about the passcode?_ He had never played in this room in the past and the entire concept was so foreign, what was he to kn-

“Tell him, Sugawara. Tell your captain the numbered code you have used for every password you’ve ever created since you met.”

_Oh._

Sugawara looked down. He wasn’t surprised. There it was, yet another free moment for him to embarrass himself in front of not only Daichi but the entire team. _I guess I better get used to this now. Here goes nothing. Just say it. There’s nothing else to do._

“12.”

A small _beep_ could be heard from the pin pad as Daichi began to punch in the numbers he was instructed. 

Shame and of course, some more tears filled Suga’s voice as he continued onto the next numbers.

“31.”

_Beep._

“94.”

There was a brief moment of hesitation before the last beeping of numbers being punched in was heard. Once the soft ding of an ‘ _ok_ ’ was given that indicated the safe was unlocked, Daichi turned to look at him.

They stared at each other like that for a moment. Sugawara’s eyes filled with embarrassment and trickles of liquid, and Daichi’s that were blank and processing.

Daichi smiled at him slightly, “My birthday?”

Sugawara choked on his words, “O-only thing I can seem to remember.”

Oikawa’s voice split the small thread that had begun to attach the pair to each other in a strangely intimate moment.

“Just fucking open it.”

Daichi closed his eyes as he turned back around and opened the little rectangular door. His heart stopped as he met the nasty tool that was laid inside. 

His back must have visibly tensed up because Oikawa had begun to laugh in that hysteric high pitched tone of his. 

“Uh huh. Turn around, captain. Show your team what you’ve got.”

He took it in his hands, feeling its weight make them drop a few centimeters. It wasn’t all that heavy, but it made his heart feel ten times its mass. If he had been standing in water, he would have sunk right down.

“Daichi,” Asahi muttered, “What is it?”

As Daichi slowly turned around to face the group, eyes met the device held in his hands. 

A silver pistol. Locked and loaded.

The room stilled and they all succumbed to the silent atmosphere as not one of them dared to let out a single breath.

Oikawa broke their silent moment, as he did best.

“Here’s a hot take for you, captain. Go ahead and point it at whoever did the worst job in this room tonight!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Those of you who commented about oikawa on the previous chapters, you have quite the eye! I purposefully kept them out of the character tags to do some off throwing as the story was being posted, but I'll be adding them there within the next week! Little disclaimer, I literally love Oikawa okay, but this was the best possible villain with perfect motive! Also I don't know if you could tell by my writing but I'm never not sympathizing wit the 'bad guy'. -_-. Anyway, I hope you guys liked it and don't mind that other characters and perspectives are being introduced. Till next time!


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Go ahead and point it at whoever did the worst job tonight in this room!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone here's another Saturday update! We're finally in the double digits and there is only 3 chapters left to write! Oikawa and Iwaizumi have officially been added to the character list as well. Anyway, go on ahead and enjoy.

_“Go ahead and point it at whoever did the worst job tonight in this room!”_

Daichi imagined himself in many places in life. He was bright, young, intelligent, strong-willed. He always knew that possibilities for him were endless and if he put his mind to it, he could go just about anywhere. But this moment right here, as he stared down a gun, was one he certainly never expected.

Who did the worst job tonight? _What the hell was that supposed to mean?_ To him, everyone did fairly well, cooperating with whatever fucked up thing Oikawa had instructed for them to do, so what was he really asking of him?

“And we don’t have all fucking night!”

Daichi flinched at the sound of his voice, forcing himself to even consider the impossible at that moment. He refused to look at anyone around him, but his mind raced with the faces of his peers as he recounted the night's memories.

Sugawara was targeted first. Poor sweet Sugawara who Daichi tried so hard all the time to protect and keep from getting hurt, unknowing (or more like blocking out) to the fact that he was the one to be hurting him in the first place. If, and it is big and complicated if, he was to turn this gun on anyone in that room, it couldn’t be him.

He’s been by his side since they started at Karasuno. He’s cared for him, helped him, invited him into his home, and most importantly, he loved him. He owed him that much. There was no way Sugawara was in the question, that night had already put him through so much.

His brain then traveled onto the evening’s second targets. Nishinoya and Tanaka seemed like a package deal to him. Where one was, the other always followed, and the same ensued for what they went through that night. There had already been a physically doxing portion of their activity, as well as an emotional one, so to turn it on either of them is just another nail in the coffin.

To turn it on only one of them simply wouldn’t make any sense, since what they did, they did together. Cross those two names off the list that he told himself he didn’t even need. 

Then there was Asahi, but Daichi was quick to shoot the thought out of his mind. The mere thought of Asahi’s face alone if he had to look at the barrel of a gun almost made Daichi’s knees buckle beneath him. That whole boy's existence was a human embodiment of fear and Daichi wanted no part in complying with the curse of anxiety that took over his everyday life.

Daichi sighed thinking about Tsukishima, but much like Tanaka and Noya if he’s thinking about Tsukishima, he’s thinking about Yamaguchi. They were just some fucking kids. Young kids in love who had hit a bump in the road and quite frankly, it was a bump that Daichi could understand. No matter how troubling watching them crash and burn may have been, Daichi wouldn’t dare.

Then there was, of course, Hinata and Kageyama who were visibly in so much pain that a shot to the body probably would’ve been a relief for them. But, he couldn’t. And no matter how pushed and threatened he was, he wouldn’t. This was his team, this was his family. It had been entrusted in him to take care of them and keep them orderly, and here they were. 

If only there had been one team member that was just completely insufferable. If only one of them had no redeeming qualities and was just such a horrible human being that had no mind for those around them. Someone who walks over people for their own gratification, someone who feeds off of other people’s pain, someone who is happy as long as they get what they want. Someone like Oikawa. Someone like him.

“Clock is ticking, captain.”

Daichi’s head hung low, but his mind was already made up. 

Tanaka skirted uncomfortably in his place, eyeing up his captain. He hated that even after everything, Daichi was still his idol, and his idol looked completely cracked. 

Even in moments of fear Daichi had kept a strong face, one that was stern and even angry that was ready to pounce when tested and willing to give anything to take care of the other boys in the room.

This Daichi was different though. This Daichi looked like he had his heart shattered into a million tiny pieces, to which if Sugawara could muster up the nearly non-existent pride within himself he would say, _serves you right._

“Daichi,” Tanaka’s voice was small as he moved toward the older. “What’s the matter?” He had a rational side of himself that understood the panic that is destined to come when presented with a weapon, but this was not fear he was reading. This was simply sadness _._

Daichi rubbed a hand over his face, stepping back away from Tanaka suddenly.

“Seriously, man. Don’t come too close, okay? I got a fucking gun in my hand.”

Tanaka was more than startled by the reaction, as were the rest of the boys in the room. Never in the contents of their time together had they been pushed away by Daichi, yet here he was, appearing almost afraid of them.

When Daichi looked up and met all of their startled faces, he became startled himself. “W-what?”

Tanaka looked down at his shoes, “Why did you do that?”

“Do what?”

“Back up when I came close.”

Tsukishima raised his eyebrow slightly. If Tanaka was seeing a new Daichi, Tsukki was certainly seeing a new Tanaka. He was acting so timid in front of their captain, staring down at his feet like a shy school girl flirting with her crush. Aside from the crying, this was an even newer version of Tanaka that he felt he could get behind.

“T-Tanaka, I have a gun.”

His eyes left the floor and finally met those of Daichi’s. Despite Tanaka being the one who, realistically, could get the gun turned on himself and cocked till a bullet was sent between his eyes at any moment, Daichi’s eyes were the ones that were wide with fear. 

“I don’t care…I trust you. You’re still Daichi.”

Daichi furrowed his eyebrows at him in a look that read, _what the fuck are you talking about?_

Nishinoya stepped up and stood by Tanaka, “Yeah. You’re still our captain, it’s not like we’re scared of you or anything.”

Glances were shared across the room as everyone nodded in agreement. While the truth of genuine fear _for_ their captain was buried underneath their sudden brave faces, the fear _of_ their captain was completely non-existent. 

Sugawara was next to chime in, taking a fearless step toward Daichi, “We trust you. We aren’t scared.”

Daichi let out a breathless laugh, “You trust me?”

_For what?_ Were the next words that echoed into his head. He had forced them all out that night and got them wrapped up in this whole mess, was exposed for being a heart playing lair, and was basically told that he was a piece of shit captain. _What exactly was there for him to be trusted for?_

Asahi’s voice didn’t let his thoughts have another second.

“Of course we trust you. You’re our number one. We wouldn’t be anywhere without you.”

_You’re right_ , he thought to himself, _you wouldn’t._ _You would be in your bedroom studying right now like the rest of the missing Karasuno team. You would probably be asleep now, having nice dreams about winning tournaments and a world of sunshine and rainbows where everyone was nice to each other and not one person held any secrets or malice._

“You do so much for us,” the pain behind Sugawara’s eyes did not disappear, oh no, it was still there, very clearly, but it became merged with that of concern and love. 

Pushing aside ideas of him as a lover, Daichi had been such an amazing friend to him throughout his time at Karasuno. He was perfectly protective, incredibly helpful, and he never let any of his friends feel left out or behind. Maybe romantically he wasn’t all that great when it came to Sugawara’s feelings, but as a simple man who cared for those around him, he was terrific. 

Sugawara smiled at him, “We love you.”

“Seriously guys, you need to step back, I mean it.”

Daichi knew that there was no immediate risk with him being in the possession of the gun, but he almost felt a sense of irresponsibility on the part of his team. There was a man with a gun, and they decided they would all huddle around him and act like everything was perfectly fine? It didn’t matter if it was Daichi, anything could have gone wrong at any moment. 

* * *

  
Oikawa stared into the screen, watching the boys as they surrounded their captain. His leg was shaking as he bounced it up and down impatiently. 

He was chewing on his nails and his eyes were wide. To Iwaizumi, who stood watching directly over his shoulder, this was the rounding of yet another breaking point.

Iwaizumi couldn’t understand why, but more than anything he felt an overwhelming sense of despair. Partly for the young men of Karasuno who could have never anticipated what the night had in store for them, and partly for the boy sat right in front of him.

Oikawa’s voice sounded above a slight mutter as he continued to nervously pick at his nails.

“They’re taking too fucking long in there. I gave them one simple order.”

As he was about to reach forward to push on the button that would bring his voice to life through the speakers of the boys’ escape room, a sound from behind him brought his hand to a halt.

It was a sound he didn’t hear too often, but heard enough over the years to have grown familiar with. It was a cross between a choke, a hiccup, and a sob. 

But it didn’t belong to just anyone. It belonged to Iwaizumi. 

Oikawa squinted as he processed yet another gasp like sound before he slowly turned around in his chair and looked up at his companion. 

“Iwa-chan…”

He was surprised to see the tears streaming down Iwaizumi’s face, but Iwaizumi’s eyes never moved to meet his. The two silent rivers stared at the screen, where the boys had been the entire night.

He reached forward to grab hold of Iwaizumi’s hands, “What is it? You know how much it hurts me to see you cry.”

Iwaizumi allowed for Oikawa to hold his hands, briefly basking in the comforting feeling of his thumbs stroking over his palms. But it was what he said that made Iwaizumi cringe internally. 

_You know how much it hurts me to see you cry._

That was his line. That was what he would always say to him. Especially in the recent past whilst witnessing Oikawa’s various breakdowns. He would hold him close and tell him how much he hated to see him cry.

He looked down at him briefly and met his eyes. 

_Were they genuine?_ Or was this a result of him having completely lost it and trying to gain some sort of humility through regurgitating the words a loved one once fed?

Oikawa’s eyes were filled with confusion and a brink of sadness that Iwaizumi couldn’t brush off as anything but real, and somehow that was all the more frightening than the first possibility. He genuinely just did not seem to understand what he was doing.

Those pleading eyes immediately softened Iwaizumi, a weakness that no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t overcome. Oikawa’s loving gaze would always win. 

The tears strained his voice, “Nothing, sweetheart.”

Oikawa kissed both of his hands and held them gently over his shoulders as he turned back to face the screen. With a final kiss to Iwaizumi’s left palm, he released the single hand and pressed down onto the microphone to send his voice traveling through the room.

“C’mon and hurry up!”

* * *

  
_“C’mon and hurry up!”_

The abrupt shooting through the speakers of Oikawa’s voice made Daichi’s eyes widen. 

His previous thoughts resurfaced, only this time different.

_Sugawara, I hurt Sugawara._

_Tanaka and Nishinoya, I encourage their competitiveness when I feel it’s beneficial for the team. It’s selfish._

_Asahi, I let him suffer in silence even though I suspected his troubles._

_Tsukishima, I let his suspicious behavior be swept under the rug._

_Yamaguchi, I sympathized with the man that hurt him._

_Kageyama, I never do enough to stop him when he gets out of line._

_Hinata, I block him out when he grows to be too irritating._

_So who did the worst job in the room that night, Oikawa?_ The answer is quite simple. 

With a swift movement, the gun was pressed against his temple similar to the way Kenma had experienced it before, the cool metal outlining his pulse as it nearly raced out of his head. 

The only difference was there was no mysterious gloved hand pushing the weapon to Daichi’s head, he was doing that all on his own. After all, he was the only one who deserved it.

Just a second ago, the players of Karasuno would have never imagined backing away from their captain. In fact, they had been arguing with him, telling him that they weren’t afraid of him. To them, having a person, a real live face, to put behind this puppet character made everything just a small tiny bit less frightening. 

But the second the click of the tool being moved onto Daichi’s body was heard, the boys collectively flinched backward.

“Daichi,” Tanaka was breathless, “Relax.”

From where Kageyama sat, hazy eyes, and pounding head, he caught a quick glimpse of the scene, and his eyes once half-lidded opened wide and stared in amazement. There Daichi went, being one hell of a captain, as always.

If only Daichi felt the same way. 

Sugawara’s voice quivered as he took a timid step forward. He was slow in his movements and kept his hands slightly raised as not to surprise Daichi, but to tell him, _don’t panic, I’m just coming closer._

“Daichi, please move it away from your head.” Daichi flinched back slightly, but Suga was careful in keeping his voice soft and comforting, “It’s okay. We’re all here. I’m here, Daichi. Nothing here is your fault.”

Daichi shook his head, closing his eyes, “N-no Suga. I’m doing this for all of us, okay? If I do what he says no one will get hurt.”

Sugawara looked around the room but was only met with wavering frightened eyes. He nodded to them, for the first time his own being firm and sure, he knew better than anyone how to approach Daichi, and he would. Daichi may have thought he had the emotional upper hand when it came to him and Sugawara’s strange relationship, but in reality, that was never the case. 

Though he could never be read romantically, Suga could always tell what Daichi needed, and when he needed it. One of those moments was right now.

“May I come closer, then? Just in case I have to say goodbye to you.”

His voice was smooth and gentle, but his tone had a hint of sarcasm in it as he purposefully fed into Daichi’s stubbornness. 

Daichi looked at him with a softened gaze and nodded slowly, lowering the gun from his head to keep it away from any vicinity Suga may have gone to touch. 

When Sugawara took a final step forward, he pulled Daichi close to him in a tight embrace. It was rather convincing, and to everyone around it looked as if it was a farewell hug. But Sugawara knew better.

He stroked Daichi’s hair the same way Daichi had done for him before, whispering to him softly to get him as calm as possible.

Sugawara knew he was successful when he felt a strong arm wrap around his waist and a head bury itself into his shoulder. He even felt the ghost of a gentle kiss pressed to the fabric of his shirt, but his mind and eyes were elsewhere. 

Daichi’s hand that was occupied with the firearm was hung to his side, keeping the gun low and away from Sugawara. The only intent he had when trying to keep it a far as possible was a means of protection. He didn’t suspect Suga in any way or worry that he may do anything, he simply didn’t want the nasty tool anywhere near the boy he may have over idolized a little too much.

In a swift movement, the gun was snatched away from Daichi’s hand and brought into Suga’s. Sugawara was quick to step back, hiding it behind his back and from the blazing eyes of its original holder.

“What the fuck are you doing, Sugawara?” Daichi’s once soothed state was gone as he became overwhelmed with frustration.

“I’m not gonna let you do something stupid, Daichi. I don’t care. You don’t have to be such a hero.”

Daichi turned his back to him and ran his hands through his hair. All he wanted was for his team to be safe, and everything that happened and continues to happen was only making that harder and harder to achieve. 

“Was that the given instruction!?”

When Oikawa’s voice arrived back into the room once again it was shrill and angry. This had been exactly what Daichi had feared. He just wanted to cooperate and get it over with, even if it meant dying in the process. Now, who knew what would come next for them?

“Sugawara, you better point it at that son of a bitch right now or so help me that’s it for this entire room!”

Sugawara was taken aback by the request. He had expected some sort of repercussion realistically, but not one like this. Sure, Oikawa would’ve gotten angry, but not this angry. Although adding a real person to the lifeless eyes of the puppet made the edge wear slightly off, Oikawa almost seemed crazier than the original inanimate villain. His smooth-talking disguise was off, and he was angry. 

“He made the decision and if you aren’t gonna let him do it by himself, you’re gonna do it for him!”

Sugawara shook his head. There was no way in hell, no matter how angry he made him, no matter how many times he broke his heart, no matter how many times he left him behind, there was nothing that would make Suga ever put Daichi in the aim of a gun.

Suga’s voice was small, “No.”

“No? No?!” Little did the oblivious team know, there was a far more rational player by Oikawa’s side, flinching with tears in his eyes every time Oikawa’s voice raised an octave. 

“If you so much as slightly change the plan in the orders I gave you, I’ll kill all of you! Point it at him right now!”

Daichi turned back to look at Suga, a look of being tired and fed up riddled in his face aside from his previous anger.

He shook his head at him, “Do as he says, Koushi.”

“I-I don’t want to.”

Kageyama gave up on trying to look, letting his eyes close again in exhaustion. Hinata moved close by his side, making sure he didn’t pass out in case he had any sort of concussion. He knew they could make do later. Probably bring him to the hospital, make up a story about him getting jumped in the street and having all his vending machine change stolen. Have the doctors ask no questions, check him out, fix him up, and send them home. But they would have to get out of there first. And if there was any chance of them doing that, Sugawara would have to point the gun at their captain. 

“Sugawara, now.”

Sugawara’s eyes widened as he glared back at Daichi, who, for some reason, believed that Suga had the heart in him to ever do such a thing.

“I will not.”

For the first time, Daichi raised his voice at Suga in anger.

“Do you want everyone in here to die?! Look around! These kids have to fucking get home!”

He spoke as if they weren’t all in the same age range. As if they weren’t all high school kids. As if they weren’t all close friends playing together on the same team. 

It sounded more as if they were small children, responsibilities, strangers even, but Daichi knew that’s how it had to seem to bring Suga to his senses and make him follow Oikawa’s orders. 

His loud voice faltered, “J-just…do what he says.”

Sugawara began to cry, “I’m sorry, Daichi.”

“It’s okay, I-I mean it, it’s okay. We don’t need anyone else getting hurt, just do it.”

“I really really don’t wanna do it, Daichi.”

Daichi couldn’t help the tears of his own that began to pool. For the first time that whole evening, Daichi began to cry. Hard. To the point where his vision was blurred and his eyes felt as if they were on fire. He couldn’t even remember the last time he had cried like this. Even at his lowest, he would never let himself cry. Yet, here he was. In front of everyone. His guard had been put completely down. 

“It’s okay, Koushi. It’s okay. I’m not angry, I won’t be angry later. It’s okay, I want you to do this. Can you do it? For me?”

Sugawara had begun to slowly raise the gun to Daichi’s body, but his arms quickly faltered and he squeezed his eyes shut as more tears formed. He shook his head and let the gun rest down in his hands, aiming at the ground, and nowhere near where the captain could be touched.

“I can’t, Daichi. I can’t.”

“Hurry the fuck up!”

It didn’t take anyone very intelligent to understand that Oikawa’s tone was nothing but serious and livid. He had sounded as if he was at his wit's end (which he had been long before the night had even taken place) and everyone in the room, even Sugawara, could acknowledge that they had to act fast, or the night would come to a terrible or tragic end.

“Suga.”

It was that last teary push of _Suga_ to travel from Daichi’s lips that made him oblige. With shaky arms he rushed to point the gun up, both trembling hands gripping it tightly. 

Yamaguchi had to hide his eyes, the sight becoming all too terrifying for him to watch much longer. As angry and upset he was with Tsukishima, he wished for him to be at his side and to block him away from the unfolding horror.

Little did he know, Tsukishima, despite knowing how upset and angry Yamaguchi was, felt the same way and used the moment as an excuse to step forward and shield the boy with his tall form. 

Yamaguchi’s eyes were widened with surprise, but he pushed everything, _and he meant everything_ , aside for that one moment and allowed himself to bury his face into Tsukishima’s back. The fabric of Tsukki’s shirt smelling like his home away from home in Tsukishima’s bedroom, taking him away from the troubling situation and letting him have a brief moment of rest. 

Sugawara’s breaths were labored as his eyes stared at the firearm, not once looking up to meet Daichi’s.

Daichi put his arms up slightly, “It’s okay, Suga, it’s okay. We’re gonna do what he says, okay?”

Suga was to busy hyperventilating to try to put together a stable work of words, but Daichi was not about to let the understanding slide.

“Okay? Tell me okay, Koushi.”

Sugawara nodded his head rapidly, his voice cracking as he fought through his sobs, “Okay. O-okay.”

“Okay,” Daichi’s eyes were filled with tears but his voice remained stable as he tried to talk Suga down, “Now, I need you to listen to me. Because I want to say something.”

Suga was taken aback and finally met his gaze. His mouth parted slightly and he furrowed his eyebrows as he waited on Daichi to continue.

“If anything’s gonna happen right now, because anything can, I need something from you.”

Hinata watched from the floor and whispered over to Kageyama as he pinched him slightly to keep him awake, “What is he doing?”

Kageyama could only shake his head weakly. _I don’t know._

Daichi continued on, his eyes never once leaving Sugawara’s. 

“I did some terrible things to you. I know I’ve hurt you, I understand that now. I am so sorry, Suga, I love you so much and I would never ever do anything purposefully that I knew would make you upset. Please, the only thing I need you to grant me right now is your forgiveness.”

Sugawara’s eyes widened, “I-I….Daichi.”

Despite the intensity of their situation, Daichi let a soft smile succumb to his face, one that was peacemaking and comforting. It was genuine and filled with nothing but love and empathy.

“Daichi,” his name came out as a sob from Sugawara’s lips, “D-Daichi, it’s okay. I forgive you.”

His smile became brighter and as he was about to speak again, to thank him, to praise him for all he’s done, Oikawa interrupted through the speakers.

“Shut up and fucking shoot him!”

Sugawara closed his eyes as another sob ripped itself from his throat. He began to shake his head again, this time so rapidly that it appeared as if his tears flung from his face and onto the ground.

“It’s okay, Suga. You do whatever he tells you to do.”

* * *

  
From the mechanical room down the hall, Iwaizumi was the most anxious he had ever been in his life. Oikawa’s out of control shouting was not lightening the situation despite the tight and loving grip he kept on his hand. 

He found himself glancing everywhere around the room. The monitors, the speakers, the microphone, the half-open door, the buttons, _so many buttons_ , Oikawa’s face.

It was all too much. He couldn’t bear to see anymore. He didn’t know what could possibly happen next. He didn’t _want_ to know.

With a gentle stroke of Oikawa’s cheek that made his head turn to face him, Iwaizumi kissed his forehead.

“I-Iwa-chan, stop it. I-I’m busy.”

He placed another gentle kiss to the boy’s forehead before leaning down and whispering softly into his ear.

“I’m so sorry, Oikawa. I hope you can forgive me someday.”

* * *

  
Sugawara’s sob infused panting led everyone in the room into a silent panic as they watched the scene unfold. His back was heaving and his limbs were shaking. All Daichi could do was offer him a small smile and assure him that it was fine and that it had to be done.

He spoke quietly, in hopes that maybe somehow Oikawa wouldn’t hear, “It doesn’t have to be vital. Just a sloppy hit. It’s okay, how bad can it possibly hurt?”

Sugawara hiccuped as he nodded through Daichi’s rationalizing. It would be hard, but if it meant securing their safety at the expense of a little pain (or worse, bleeding out after being left stranded in the room for any longer), then he had to do it.

“You can do it, Koushi.”

He could.

He had to.

So he would.

Except he would never get the chance.

A booming sound, simply too strong to ever belong to that of a gun.

A burst through the entire room. Through the entire building.

A loud one. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that y'all are here, can anyone tell I associate 505 by the Arctic Monkeys with Iwaoi, LOL.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The loud booming sound of the gun that the boys all expected to hear was replaced with one all the more loud, angrier, even, that no one could have prepared themselves for.
> 
> A burst through the entire room. Through the entire building.
> 
> A loud one. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Super early chapter update for everyone because this one is rather on the short side compared to the others. That's because it's the foundation for our finale coming up in the last two chapters. I can't believe we're already almost finished, this has been so much fun!

_The loud booming sound of the gun that the boys all expected to hear was replaced with one all the more loud, angrier, even, that no one could have prepared themselves for._

_A burst through the entire room. Through the entire building._

_A loud one._

Eyes were blurry and mouths were dry. All that could be seen is a haze of black fuzziness and all that was heard was the intense ringing of the ears.

With his body now dropped to the floor and his knees drawn up to his chest, hands covering both of his ears, Daichi thought he was dead. 

He was sure that Sugawara fired the gun and it hit him vitally and that he was dead.

Sugawara, who was also now dropped to the floor in a similar position, thought he had made a mistake. He thought that in his frenzy he had quickly pulled the trigger and sent the loud ear-piercing sound throughout the room. He refused to look up and his hands shook as he feared the worst. 

Sometime between the sound and his stumble backward which rammed Yamaguchi into the wall roughly, Tsukishima had lost his glasses and couldn’t see a thing. He found that he couldn’t speak or hear even, and the only thing that let him know he was still alive was the feeling of Yamaguchi’s dull nails digging into the bare skin of his arms.

Asahi had his head tucked firmly between his knees. Crouched on the floor just behind Sugawara, he hadn’t even got the chance to comprehend what had happened. The most he saw was Sugawara’s hands, and he knew well enough that the gun was never fired. He shook his head slowly as he tried to regain his awareness. There was only one thing on his mind.

_The bomb went off._

_But am I still alive?_

With a pounding in his head, he slowly lifted his eyes to view the room. Everything was blurry, but he made out enough before he closed his eyes again. He concluded that maybe he wasn’t alive and that the vision of the room and all of his injured and tired schoolmates was their own personally made hell. 

Hinata had sprawled himself out across Kageyama, looking as if he was trying to shield him from whatever it was that had just taken place. He was sure that Kageyama was unconscious now, but for as long as he could feel him breathing against his body, he knew everything would be okay.

Tanaka had his eyes squeezed shut, but with his limp body, anyone who couldn’t see the tension in his face would assume that he was passed out too. 

The only one with their senses clear and their mind and body alert was Nishinoya, who stayed on the floor on his hands and knees, eyes wandering the room and looking at all of his friends.

Despite his awareness, there was a shock that found itself living in Nishinoya’s body. The intensity of the situation they had just been in combined with the loud booming interruption made him almost queasy. He swallowed down any of his dinner that threatened itself to come up and continued to look at the floor where all of the other boys cowered down.

_What just happened?_

He turned his head slowly, observing each body that lay very much alive but scared senseless to have any sort of movement or action to give. He was careful in his scan of the room, catching splotches of a bloody floor, bloody clothing, damp hair from sweat and tears, two pairs of standing legs with two pairs of thick black boots-

_What?_

Nishinoya’s head spun as he snapped back to the view of the boots swiftly. There was no way anyone in the room was in any position to be standing amongst the emotional ruin, and he knew well no one in the room would ever own those clearly expensive looking boots. Oh no, these were city-style shoes.

His eyes slowly trailed up the legs that were attached to the two pairs of boots and his eyes widened at the length of them. 

They were tall.

His eyes slowly reached the pairs torsos. Their shoulders broad and their arms well toned. 

They were strong too.

With one more slow movement of his eyes, he met two familiar faces, riddled with concern and eyes blazing with a desire to help.

“B-Bokuto?”

With a quick glance to the partner by his side, he nodded and moved forward.

Bokuto was quick to crouch down to Nishinoya, lifting him up slightly in the process, “Hey, you okay buddy?”

Nishinoya allowed his small body to slump against Bokuto’s much larger one, but he neglected to answer his question, far more preoccupied with the view of the other man also rushing to his side.

“Kuroo?”

Kuroo smiled at him sadly, “Yeah, man. It’s me. You good?”

Nishinoya didn’t know either Kuroo or Bokuto very well. Sure, he had played against them in a few matches and spent some time away with them during training camps, but he didn’t get anywhere near as close to them as Hinata, or (in a way everyone saw now as much less innocent) Tsukishima. 

But that didn’t stop him as he took a look at the two older boys now kneeling at his side and smashed himself into their large bodies, searching for any sense of comfort he could find.

Kuroo was first to catch hold of him, wrapping his arms around his small form. 

“Woah,” he muttered quietly but didn’t bother to ask any questions nonetheless. He stared down at the top of Nishinoya’s head from where it cowered into his chest, hiding his face. Slowly, Kuroo raised his head and looked back at Bokuto, eyes widened with surprise.

Bokuto only shrugged, eyes filled with pity. Kuroo seemed to feel the same way as he continued to soothe the boy in his arms with strong rubs to his back.

Daichi slowly raised his shaky head, almost flinching when he saw the two tall boys crouched by Nishinoya. He squinted as he tried to comprehend the sight. _Was he really dead? Was he going crazy?_

Bokuto turned to look at him, a comforting smile engrossing his features, “Daichi. Are you okay?”

“Bokuto?”

He chuckled slightly at the surprised tone that accented the sound of his name. It came out in the same way Nishinoya’s did when they first made their grand entrance into the room.

“Yep. We came to get you.”

At the sound of the various voices, everyone was now up straight and looking around the room, relieved yet still confused to be seeing new faces having joined them.

Hinata let go of Kageyama’s body gently, placing it up against the wall so that his sleeping form wasn’t disturbed. He ran over to Bokuto, nearly leaping into his arms in the process.

“Bokuto!”

The action seemed to make everything in the room (at least for the pair of them) significantly lighter. Bokuto laughed as he stood up and scooped Hinata into his arms, spinning him in a circle. 

“Hinata!”

Daichi furrowed his eyebrows as he watched, his brain still working to comprehend what was going on. Hinata’s happiness almost threw him even more off guard, but the fearsome eyes of everyone else around brought him back down to Earth. 

That was just Hinata, and of course, Bokuto was quite the eccentric one himself. Daichi found himself acknowledging that Hinata was in no way as comfortable with him as he was with Bokuto, and he figured it was because Bokuto seemed to baby him more. The way he swept Hinata into his arms resembled that of a father arriving home from work and greeting his toddler. 

He rested his head back down onto the ground in exhaustion. _Father_. Who knows how many times his father had tried to get a hold of him in the endless hours they were left in that room. 

He had told them they were going to be going into the escape room and would be gone for a few hours on end, but the time was far too stretched now and he was bound to have called multiple times at this point. That made him start to think about everyone else’s parents as well, but this only made him feel worse.

Daichi rubbed his hands over his eyes. Through this whole night, they were all his responsibility and he had failed them.

Little did he know, Tanaka was imagining something similar as he watched Hinata and Bokuto reunite. Only, he wasn’t thinking about his father, he was thinking about his sister. 

He felt that he took for granted the simple moments of his sister’s insufferable teasing that revolved around trapping his head under her arm and dragging him around the house with her. A nature much more light-hearted than the vicious ‘teasing’ he had seen take place that night.

“What the fuck happened in here?” Bokuto was shocked as he looked around the room and saw the remainder of blood splotched all around. Sure, when he came he was expecting the worst, but not _this_.

Daichi pushed himself up on shaking legs, “A lot.”

“Bokuto,” Hinata’s voice was small as he looked up at his upperclassman and mentor, stars of idolization in his eyes.

He looked down at him and smiled, trying to find a hint of lightheartedness to offer the boy in his brief moment of shock, “Yes, Hinata.”

“Can you put me down now?”

He had been so encompassed by the condition of the room that Bokuto hadn’t noticed that he still had Hinata up in his arms, dangling idly with his feet barely hovering over the ground.

“You’re so little, I didn’t even realize.” He put him down with a chuckle and a ruffle to his hair, hoping that his casual demeanor would somehow make Hinata feel better. 

He surely had a good front up, but Bokuto felt as if he had this kid figured out well enough. If he could act as casual as possible, giving him as much faith in getting out and getting home as he could, then whatever hid behind that tough front would be at ease and his fake calmness would become somewhat real. 

Kuroo’s head raced up to the one lone figure standing upright against the wall, bare face scrunched up as his eyes stayed squeezed shut tightly. _Tsukishima._

Bokuto seemed to notice him too and he messed with Hinata’s hair affectionately as he made his way over to him with Kuroo. There was yet another student and player of Karasuno that Bokuto held a soft spot in his heart for.

He was never given the chance to reach forward first as Kuroo grabbed hold of him and wrapped him into an embrace so quickly and tightly that no one was able to make any sort of movement in return or rejection. 

“Jesus, kid. Always gotta be doing something.”

Kuroo’s words were soft and muttered into Tsukishima’s shoulder who weakly returned the hug with limp arms. Kuroo thought it had been a shared moment between the two of them. Scandalous history and fling that could get them in some shit aside, this was someone who he helped train. This was someone that he was able to transcend his own love for volleyball into. 

Once he lifted his head from Tsukishima’s shoulder and opened his eyes, he realized that was most certainly not a sweet moment shared alone. The eyes he met were knowing. And they were hurt. And they made Kuroo’s heart sink.

Pressed against the wall directly behind Tsukishima was Yamaguchi, right where Tsukki had left him after accidentally shoving him backwards. 

His eyes were wide and welling with tears as he stared back at Kuroo. The blazing lit fire of anger that could be spotted behind his dark eyes silently spoke to him a thousand words.

A thousand words that Kuroo could easily summarize into a simple five.

_I know what you did._

He hoped to whatever God was listening that his eyes spoke back to him because his voice didn’t have the guts or the heart to speak up.

He didn’t want a thousand words to travel through, he only wanted for three of them to reach the boy.

_I’m so sorry._

Kuroo then stepped back, unable to handle the pitiful stare of Yamaguchi for much longer. As he removed his arms from Tsukishima’s body and looked away from the pair, he knew that a day would never go by again without the thought of that tortured first-years face. 

Sensing the tension, Bokuto made a quick detour to where Kageyama sat passed out on the floor. He grabbed hold of the back of his head gently, lifting it from the hard surface of the wall behind it.

“How long has he been out?”

Hinata hurried over to grab his head, a protective instinct for the knocked out Kageyama bubbling within him.

“Not very long.”

“Oh my fuck.” Kuroo bent down and examined Kageyama’s face, “He’s covered in blood. What the fuck happened?”

Hinata turned his head to the ground. He knew he had to do it and he knew Kageyama had no objections, but seeing him now in such a state as well as the reactions of their new guests made him feel painfully guilty for having hurt him. 

Bokuto turned to look at him in anticipation of a response, but upon seeing his saddened downturned face, he reached out and grabbed hold of his hand.

“Hey, it’s okay. Let’s talk about it later, yeah?”

Hinata nodded gratefully, squeezing Bokuto’s hand and wallowing in the way it’s large surface gave him authoritative comfort. 

Sugawara was relieved to see that there were others Hinata could confide in. Especially after this whole ordeal that he wasn’t sure he could ever fully come back from. 

That thought led him to questions of his own, but Tanaka was quick to jump on them before he got the chance to do so himself.

“How did you guys know to come here anyway?”

Bokuto let out a chuckle, “Bit of a long story.”

Despite the edge he found he now harbored, Kuroo chuckled in a way that mirrored Bokuto's, focusing his eyes to the screen and the blue puppet photo that he had become familiar with after all of those nights spent hanging out behind the counter with Kenma as he worked.

_Fuck. Kenma._

_He had to hurry and get to Kenma._

“Where is that son of a bitch Oikawa anyway?”

Daichi ran a hand over his face, “I’m not sure. He’s been awfully quiet.”

* * *

  
The loud vicious sound of the door being smashed open didn’t hit the control room nearly as hard as it hit the room the boys resided in, but it still had Oikawa nearly flinching out of his seat and shielding his face for a moment. 

As he slowly turned his head and saw the two fellow third years he once knew standing in the doorway, he lurched forward, hand heading straight for the button that would end the night once and for all. 

Before he could make any further movements, Iwaizumi grabbed him from behind, locking his body back against the chair and keeping him tightly restrained. 

“I-Iwa-chan. S-stop it.”

Oikawa realized that it had become hard for him to breathe and for the first time in his life, he was terribly ungrateful for the strength of Iwaizumi’s muscular toned arms.

Iwaizumi was hiccuping through sobs behind him. The pain of having to finally give Oikawa a taste of his own nearly suffocating for the boy that loved him so much.

“I’m sorry.”

Oikawa was too busy thrashing in the extensive grip to acknowledge or even hear what was said, which made Iwaizumi feel all the more worse.

As Oikawa struggled and fought, Iwaizumi’s cell phone stayed open and left astray on a table off to the side away from all of the monitors, speakers, and microphones.

If someone were to take a look at the neglected screen, they would be greeted with an open text message.

> **From: Kuroo**   
>  **We’re here.**

Oikawa refused to give up even though he knew he stood no chance to Iwaizumi. Maybe Oikawa had a few inches of height on him, but when it came to muscle mass and overall body strength, Iwaizumi could put him in his grave.

He grew weak, but he wouldn’t let his body give in. The physical strength he put in made it impossible to release any sounds from his mouth, but his brain rang wildly with all of the things he wished he could say at that moment.

_This is what you wanted me to forgive you for, huh Iwa-Chan?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The boys have arrived


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is what you wanted me to forgive you for, huh Iwa-Chan?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I was gonna wait to post this but I got excited...I can't believe we're nearing the end:(. Thank you all for being here! For the last chapter, I will likely be working on it for an extra week, so expect an update the week after the next (unless I finish early and get excited again). Anyway, there is lots to unpack here! Enjoy<3

_This is what you wanted me to forgive you for, huh Iwa-Chan?_

If only Oikawa knew. 

There was so much more to the story, so much more of an explanation to everything that had happened, and oh so quickly too just to add the messy icing on the disaster of a cake. 

But Iwaizumi was likely never to tell Oikawa the whole truth of what happened that night. But if he did, it would probably go a little bit like this.

* * *

  
_With a harsh push that sent the small player down onto the concrete just outside of the entrance to the building, Iwaizumi closed the front door behind him and shoved the gun into his back pocket._

_Kenma Kozume had tears in his eyes as he peered up at the older, the familiarity in his face creating a realization so dawning and frightening he had almost forgotten how to breathe._

_In the tense rush out that was the gun first being placed against his head, Kenma hadn’t paid any attention to the person responsible for his grief. His eyes had been glued shut in fear and filled with tears to the point that his vision was no longer reliable._

_Now, finally outside with the chilly late night air hitting his face, his vision was clear._

_“I-Iwaizumi?”_

_Iwaizumi seemed to experience grief of his own at the pitiful way his name came from Kenma’s lips. The sound reeked of fear and…betrayal? Unfortunately for him, this wasn’t the end of the betrayal that Iwaizumi would recept people to._

_He turned away from Kenma, unable to look at the helpless boy in his eyes. He was the reason for all of that fear. All of those terrified tears that had his face a leaking disaster and his voice a cracking sound of shame._

_“Jesus,” he muttered before turning back around, forcing himself to look down at the boy._

_The moment Iwaizumi’s eyes met his, Kenma backed away on his hands, the gravel of the sidewalk by the entrance digging into his palms harshly._

_“Hey, hey, look.” Iwaizumi stayed put to avoid startling him further. Deep down he knew, one step closer and Kenma would’ve sent himself reeling into the parking lot. “Listen, I’m not gonna hurt you. I need you to listen to me.”_

_Kenma’s eyes widened further as he stared up at Iwaizumi._

_A second ago he had a gun pressed against his head, creating a feeling he would never be able to forget. Even there on the cold hard floor, he felt the reminiscent ghost of the barrel on his temple._

_“I’m on your side, okay? I don’t want anyone getting hurt.”_

_Kenma finally fought with himself to let out a string of words that would orchestrate some sort of answers to the predicament he found himself in._

_“W-who is doing this with you? Is it Oikawa?”_

_At the sound of the boy’s name, Iwaizumi visibly flinched. It was subtle and there was a clear attempt to cover it up. That was all Kenma needed to piece together his assumption, but Iwaizumi was quick to brush it off._

_“Listen, that doesn’t matter okay? Don’t you want to help your friends?”_

_Kenma stared down at the pavement._

_His friends?_

_He frowned as he thought about the excitement that riddled Hinata’s face as he greeted him that night. The sheer innocent look of a boy ready to have some fun. Kenma hadn’t shown it, but he was so happy to see him like that. He had to help them, no matter what he had to do._

_A wave of strength hit him and he peered up at Iwaizumi and nodded._

_“Good.” Iwaizumi crossed his arms. “I’m gonna let you leave. Go. Get out of here. Get some help, call your other friends and bring them here. I promise I’ll keep-“ Iwaizumi stumbled slightly as Oikawa’s names slipped from his lips, “-Oikawa in line. Just, please, for my sake don’t go calling any cops.”_

_The man who shoved a pistol against his head was begging him not to call the police, but lucky for him, Kenma hadn’t even considered it in the first place. The first thing that came to his mind when he was told to go and fetch help was Kuroo. To him, Kuroo was a figure of strength that could somehow save the day no matter what the situation._

* * *

  
Kuroo kneeled down in front of Tanaka and examined the red-spotted shirt that was wrapped tightly around his arm.

“Tanaka, what happened to you?”

Tanaka kept his eyes closed and shook his head, “Long story.”

Nishinoya looked away in shame. The night was a constant tidal wave of bringing forth new uptight ideas and information only to wash them all away with another one that’s all the more wild and out there. He had almost forgotten what had happened, but with a quick glance at Tanaka and a look down at his own scarred hand, he remembered. And he always would.

Hinata looked down at Kageyama’s face and frowned.

“He got hurt pretty bad, huh?” Bokuto’s voice was gentle and in no way pointing any fingers or blaming him, but Hinata still felt a pang of intangible guilt at the acknowledgment. 

He nodded, pulling Kageyama’s face up to meet his own.

“He got hurt.” His voice was tiny and weak. Had Bokuto not been squatted right near the pair, he wouldn’t have heard a thing. It appeared more as if he were speaking to Kageyama personally then reaffirming Bokuto’s hypotheses. 

Once Bokuto looked away, the frown on his own face seemingly embarrassing and he worked to hide it from the younger, Hinata placed a gentle kiss to Kageyama’s forehead.

He smiled slightly to himself as he thought about the way Kageyama would have smacked him one if he had been awake.

“You guys must be exhausted.”

Kuroo stood up and looked around the room at each of them, making sure his eyes traveled quickly when they moved over Yamaguchi. 

“Yeah,” Bokuto agreed, moving up to stand beside him, “How long have you guys been in here anyway?”

Sugawara stared down at the floor blankly, the evening seeming to have officially taken its toll, “Since midnight.”

Kuroo pulled his phone from his pocket.

**3:30 AM.**

He huffed, “Jesus.”

It was an escape room, he saw the way these things worked, people are usually in there for quite a while, but three and a half hours? Let alone three and half hours of what looked like pure torture? He couldn’t even process what they must have been feeling.

Bokuto shook his head, “We gotta get you guys out of here then.”

Kuroo and Bokuto were both caught off guard as the boys of Karasuno looked over at the table in unison. They stared at it in fear and wonder, as if it was somehow the definition of their make or break.

Kuroo paused, “…What?”

“T-The bomb.” Asahi gulped over the words he forced out.

Kuroo’s head snapped toward him.

“The what?”

Asahi met his eyes and Kuroo felt his blood run cold at the look of him. He has seen fear in Asahi’s eyes before, really everyone has, but not fear like this. He wasn’t just frightened, for the time being, he was scarred for the long run.

“The bomb.”

* * *

  
_The moment Iwaizumi turned his back, Kenma began to sprint, his sneakers pelting off the floor roughly. He didn’t know why he was running. Really, he was granted his getaway for free and there was no risk if he had walked a normal pace, but there was something about having to face the elder for even a moment longer._

_All he could do was run._

_So he ran._

_Until he hit his bus stop home and his chest was heaving with every winded breath he tried to take. He doubled over, his hand reaching up this chest in an attempt to regain any sort of steady breaths he could find._

_With his free shaking hand, he reached into his sweater for his cellphone and swiped the screen. Tears began to splatter onto it as his head faced down, and his slippery fingers made his phone glitch and all of the wrong numbers were pressed._

_“Fuck!”_

_Nobody was around to hear him._

_With a quick swipe of the screen on his sweater, he managed to dial Kuroo’s number._

_He shook his leg and bit his lip anxiously as he waited for the line to be picked up._

_“Hey, Kitten. You good?”_

_Kuroo’s voice was as raspy as ever and it was clear to Kenma that he had been sleeping. Still, his usual flirtatious tone laid strong and while Kenma would have usually gotten annoyed by it, he was immeasurably relieved at the deep sound._

_“K-Kuroo.”_

_The tears in his voice were more than evident and a rustle of the sheets could be heard. Kenma imagined Kuroo’s face as he shot upright in his bed, eyes widened and ready to run if he was asked to._

_“What happened, Kozume? Where are you? Weren’t you working?”_

_“S-Something happened. I-I’m at the bus stop.”_

_“Do you need me?”_

_Kenma shut his eyes. The question was not even needed because even if Kenma had said no (like he did multiple times in the past when Kuroo caught him upset), Kuroo would be there anyway._

_“Y-yes.”_

_“Don’t you move I’m on the way.”_

* * *

“What do you mean, bomb?”

Kuroo almost waved off what Asahi had been rambling about. Maybe he had gotten hurt too and was far too punch drunk to comprehend what was going on. Maybe his mouth was spewing bullshit because his brain was mush from one too many slings of possibly fists or insults. 

He was frantic and scared, and both Kuroo and Bokuto almost dismissed him before the few nodding heads in agreement caught the pairs’ eyes. 

“He’s serious.” Daichi’s stern voice was enough for them to finally believe the obscure statement. “That’s why all of us look like shit right now. He made us do all this stuff and if we didn’t he said he’d set this bomb off.”

“What the fuck?” Bokuto’s voice was breathy as he ran his hand through his hair. _How could Oikawa of all people be capable of doing such a thing?_

Kuroo shook his head, “Where is it?”

“Under the table,” Sugawara whispered and pointed his weak arm at the table in the center of the room. 

Kuroo glanced over to Bokuto who got the message he sent with his eyes and nodded, moving forward to investigate. He ducked down onto the floor and Sugawara had to look away. The sight was all too much like the one he saw earlier that evening of Daichi crouching down to see if the said bomb was actually even there.

Once he was low enough on the ground, Bokuto tilted his head up. There he met the same sight as Daichi. 

_Strapped by mounds of grey duct tape, a black box clung to the table’s bottom._

He stood up and chewed on his lip nervously, “Definitely a bomb.”

“That guy’s fucked.” Kuroo turned to stare at the television screen, almost waiting to see Oikawa’s face appear so he can go up and spit in it. 

“T-that’s why,” Sugawara started quietly, “Just walking out right now is a bit risky…”

Kuroo nodded, “Yeah, I know. But just standing here is risky in itself. I mean, he can see us right? We can’t just wait in here.”

Bokuto stepped up next to Kuroo, facing the television and searching for any sign of life behind it.

“Hey! Oikawa! Iwaizumi! You hearing us!?”

Kageyama’s eyes shot open and he glanced over toward the screen, “Iwaizumi?”

Before anyone could react to the boy’s waking, the static of the speakers sparked up through the room.

* * *

_Kenma sobbed into his hands in the passenger seat of Kuroo’s car as he raced down the now empty streets of Tokyo. Kuroo’s hand that wasn’t on the steering wheel was strong on his shoulder as he tried to console the younger and make out what he could of the situation he was in._

_Kenma hiccuped through his words, “A-and now they’re s-stuck there with Oikawa a-and Iwaizumi told me I-I could go call for help a-and I’m so scared. I don’t know what’s going on.”_

_“Kitten it’s okay, I’m gonna help you.” Kuroo frowned deeply as he thought of what to do. When Kenma first started his sobbing rampage, he made it clear that Kuroo couldn’t go to the cops. Kuroo was fine with that. He didn’t want any cops involved, especially if he planned on fucking up Iwaizumi’s face for putting a gun anywhere near Kenma._

_Kenma wiped his face with the sleeve of his sweater, but the tears kept streaming down and his whole body shook in fear._

_This only made Kuroo want to work faster._

_“Do me a favor, text Bokuto. Tell him everything that happened and that I’m on my way to pick him up.”_

_With shaking hands, Kenma did what was asked of him. Typing out a broken-down version of the whole story and hoping to god Bokuto would take it seriously._

_But it’s Bokuto._

_Bokuto who was sat on the couch with Akaashi at 3 AM, completely enamored by the way the movie they were watching lit up his face in the dark._

_“Woah, Akaashi. You look beautiful.”_

_“Please stop it.” Despite his embarrassment toward the compliment, Akaashi only moved closer to Bokuto, slowly being lulled to sleep by the warmth of the bigger body._

_Bokuto wrapped his arms around him tighter, resting his head atop of his. He let out a happy sigh. These were his favorite moments._

_His least favorite moments were when his favorite moments were interrupted. And now they were as his phone began to vibrate lowly from the coffee table sat in front of them._

_Akaashi’s eyes glanced over at the screen illuminating the dark room and squinted his eyes at its harshness. His quick glance showed him that the message left was long._

_“Looks important,” he moved out of Bokuto’s grasp, making him pout in the process. He grabbed the phone for him, being sure not to look at the message and invade his privacy. “Here,” he handed it to him and Bokuto took it, the silly pout still on his face._

_Akaashi smiled softly at his silly face but his smile soon turned to concern as Bokuto’s expression dropped in his reading of the lengthy text._

_“Holy shit,” he stood up quickly, throwing on the sweater he left astray on the couch’s armrest._

_“What’s the matter?” Akaashi straightened his back as he watched Bokuto move urgently._

_“Kuroo needs my help with something.”_

_“In the middle of the night?”_

_His phone vibrated again and he looked down to see another much shorter message from Kuroo telling him that he was outside._

_“Yeah, I know, I’m sorry,” he leaned down and kissed Akaashi on the top of his head, “I have to run out, but I’ll be back as soon as I can. You’ll hear all about it later.”_

_With that he ran out to the car, leaving Akaashi stunned on the couch, wondering what had caused his panic._

_“So what are we gonna do?” Bokuto closed the back door of the car and was even more taken off guard at the sound of Kenma’s uncontrollable sobs._

_“I texted Iwaizumi. He knows we’re going.”_

_Bokuto shifted into the middle seat and buried his hands into his pockets, “What do you think is happening in there?”_

_Kuroo shook his head, “I have no idea. But we have to help them.”_

* * *

  
That would have been the last thing told of the story leading up to the moment in which Iwaizumi received a text that read **_“We’re here.”_**

He held Oikawa firmly in his arms, restricting him from any last movement he could even imagine himself making. 

Even with just one arm, he knew he could keep Oikawa in place, so he tightened the grip of his right arm and with his left, moved to speak into the microphone. 

Oikawa stared up at him but Iwaizumi refused to make eye contact. The vision of tears and betrayal would make him crumble. And now was no time for that.

From inside the escape room, Iwaizumi’s voice blew through the speakers.

“I got him guys, it’s fine. Go.”

  
Bokuto glanced over at Bokuto. _Do we trust him?_

It was an unspoken exchange that Kuroo understood. He nodded back at Bokuto.

“Let’s go, guys.”

The boys of Karasuno all looked around at each other hesitantly. 

_That’s it?_

_Just like that?_

_We get to leave?_

“Let’s get some help here, yeah? Bokuto and I will pick up Kageyama, some of you can help out Tanaka.” Kuroo paused as he looked over at him, “He doesn’t look so good.”

Daichi snapped out of his trance-like state and nodded. “Asahi?” 

Asahi nodded and moved alongside him to Tanaka.

“You gonna be okay?” Daichi lifted Tanaka’s arm around his shoulder gently, watching to make sure Asahi did it just the same to avoid hurting him.

Tanaka nodded, “Oh yeah. Just get me out of here.”

With a quick count to three, Tanaka was up.

Kuroo and Bokuto did the same for the now aware Kageyama who glanced around the room with blurry vision, “H-huh?”

“You’re gonna be okay, kid. Let’s go.”

The pair led the way out the door, but Kageyama struggled slightly in their grip, “I-Iwaizumi?”

“Shh.” Bokuto’s strength outdid his and he continued to pull him out of the room.

After them was Daichi, Asahi, and Tanaka being supported between them. 

Next was Tsukishima, Hinata, and Yamaguchi.

Nishinoya trailed close behind them, his eyes never leaving the ground.

The last left to walk out was Sugawara. He paused in the doorway momentarily, the memories of the night all flooding back in an instant. 

He glanced back behind him, taking in the room and all of its contents. A place that was once full of fun and excitement for him turned to something vile and unthinkable.

_Better take a good look, Suga._

_Last time you’ll ever see it._

He closed the door behind him and followed the group as they walked out of the building. 

Kuroo and Bokuto were thankfully quick witted and were able to compose a plan to get them out of the vicinity in no time. 

Kuroo would bring the injured boys, alongside Daichi who insisted on taking the lead in aiding them despite Hinata’s protests and attempts, to the hospital where they could fix up an easy story and have them quickly treated. The rest of the boys would wait across the street with Bokuto while he called a few taxis to pick them all up.

He hung up his cellphone and watched as Kuroo drove off, Kenma still crying in the passenger seat.

“The cabs are heading over to Kuroo’s place, okay? We’re all gonna hang out over there for the night.”

Yamaguchi wished he could curl up on himself at that moment. He appreciated any ounce of hospitality, especially in his current situation, but the thought of having to sit in Kuroo’s house knowing that his own boyfriend had gone behind his back with him was repulsive. 

Nishinoya refused to go with the boys to the hospital, allowing the extra seat in the car to be saved for Daichi who could act as their responsible savior. His hand would be fine, all he needed is some bandages and a little prayer that hoped he didn’t actually need any stitches.

He stood in exhaustion next to Yamaguchi and when he spoke his voice seemed far away as did his eyes that stared fixedly at the ground.

“Don’t bother being upset right now.”

Yamaguchi’s head turned toward him quickly, eyebrows furrowing as he waited for more.

“Just swallow it. Deal with it later.”

Yamaguchi stared at him in wonder before slowly nodding his head and turning back to look at the floor. He could swallow it down. He could have a quiet night. But that doesn’t mean he wouldn’t be choking into his hand as he tried to stifle his sobs later that night once everyone put themselves to sleep. 

Some soft sounds of car wheels hitting the road and accompanying headlights began to approach them.

Bokuto smiled, “Ah, here they are.”

Sugawara looked up at Asahi, who was already staring down at him. 

For the first time in a while, Asahi smiled at him and placed his arm around his shoulders.

“Let’s get the fuck out of here.”

* * *

  
The struggle in the control room let up until Iwaizumi was absolutely sure the boys had exited the building. He watched every camera on every screen his eyes raced over fast enough and once he was sure, he let go.

To his surprise, Oikawa slumped out of his chair and curled in on himself onto the floor, sobbing into his knees. This only made Iwaizumi’s eyes widen.

_What did I do?_

“Oikawa…”

He snapped around quickly, the tears running down his face turning his cheeks a flushed red that softened Iwaizumi even more.

“Fuck you, Hajime! Fuck you!”

“O-Oikawa, Touro, baby, I’m sorry, okay?”

Oikawa lunged his arm back as if he was swatting Iwaizumi’s entire presence away from him, “It is not okay! How could you do that?!”

Iwaiuzmi knew he was always weak for him and that he always would be, but right now he had to be strong. Right now, he had to take the troubled boy he was desperate to help and get him the fuck out of the fucking Blue Puppet and somewhere he could calm down.

He took a deep breath and swallowed the lump in his throat that could only ever be formed from his love for the sobbing mess of a boy. “Fine,” Iwaizumi moved forward without hesitation, “Up you go then.”

He took a struggling Oikawa into his arms and allowed him to thrash as he carried him out of the building. 

He got obscenely heavy whacks to the face and kicks to his shins and hips, but he refused to put the boy down until they were on the field just across the street, the building that was the Blue Puppet appearing as an artifact in the middle of the city.

Oikawa began to hit Iwaizumi’s chest roughly as he cried, but Iwaizumi caught his arms firmly in his hands.

“Listen, the night was going nowhere. We all had to get out of there.”

“It w-was going somewhere! I had this!” Oikawa lifted his hand and Iwaizumi’s eyes widened as they met the small little device that served one purpose and one purpose only.

To trigger the bomb that would have really put an end to the night. 

Iwaizumi shut his eyes, “Look, Oikawa. It wasn’t real okay? It wasn’t. None of them were. Every bomb I strapped in every room was a dud. I only did it because you told me too but I really didn’t want anybody to get hurt. I’m so so so sorry. If we stayed in there it would only be a waste of time.”

Oikawa stared at him with his blank damp eyes, “Really Hajime?”

"Yes.”

“So if I press it right now, nothing will happen?”

Iwaizumi threw up his arms, “Why would you do that? What’s the point? What is there to prove?”

“Well, you wouldn’t see any problem in me pressing it if they were all duds. Right?”

“There’s no point, don’t be silly. We have a long drive, we have to go.”

Oikawa stared Iwaizumi dead in the eyes as he lifted the button up further into his line of vision. 

Iwaizumi shook his head, “No, Oikawa. Stop it, no, n-“

His slender finger hit the button.

And as if it were nothing but some old construction site, it burst into flames after a loud sound that woke up an entire neighborhood.

_Iwaizumi would always do what Oikawa says._

_Oikawa knew that._

As the flames reached up and danced with the winds of the night sky, Oikawa watched.

His eyes twinkled with the fire that had been burning there long before.

Up, up, up, and away into flames. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Purposely just wanted to write some Bokuaka fluff LOL


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Up, up, up, and away into flames. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are guys...final chapter! This has been such an emotional rollercoaster and I honestly thank you all so much for riding it. I'll talk more in the end notes, but this chapter is pretty long in comparison to others so I hope you enjoy it! Take it away boys..

_Up, up, up, and away into flames._

That’s what the newscaster described on the tuned down television with the high-quality video of a fiery building in the Sugawara household.

It was Monday and the news was still covering the unsolved story as the minor damage caused to the street around the area was patched up and cleaned. 

Sugawara Koushi stayed rested on his couch in front of the television, soft blanket thrown over his lap and sad eyes watching the screen. He was home. He was safe. But seeing the building, as ruined and unrecognizable as it was, took him right back to that night. Even at the mere view of a screen, Suga anticipated the sound of Oikawa’s masked voice to emerge. 

He couldn’t go to school that day. He knew that he couldn’t avoid it forever, and he didn’t plan on it either, he just knew that in order to feel better and find the courage to reface his team he would have to take a day to himself to rest up.

The drive home from Tokyo that next morning was silent and awkward and Suga was too frightened to reach out to anyone to see if they had arrived home alright after he'd been dropped off. He wouldn’t just yet. He thought that he deserved some time to breathe on his own without thinking about anyone else, but still, his mind raced.

He listened as the newscaster spoke once again through the speakers. He raised the volume slightly. 

_“The explosion is said to have taken place at approximately 4:00 am. Thankfully, no one was present in the building at this time as the rooms were vacant and the attendant that was scheduled had just finished his shift and headed out. Luckily, the second employee hadn’t shown up-"_

Sugawara wondered who had given the news that fake tip. Maybe it was Kenma? Maybe Kuroo stepped up and did it for him? He had so many questions that had to be answered and so many wonderments occupying his dizzy head. 

He began to feel his phone vibrating from its spot under his leg and with a sigh, he reached under and pulled it out.

The screen was lit up with a photo. 

An all-too familiar good looking boy with cropped black hair and a volleyball uniform. The name “ **Daichi** ” big above it.

Sugawara stared at the photo for a few seconds that had felt like an eternity on the other end for Daichi before he finally mustered the confidence to answer the phone.

“H-Hello?” Sugawara coughed quietly to clear the hoarseness in his voice.

“Hey, Koushi,” the sound of his name off his tongue sounded like Daichi had taken a breath of the freshest air he had ever experienced.

Sugawara couldn’t fight the small smile that came over him. Daichi was happy to hear his voice.

“Hi Dai. How was it today?” 

Sugawara squinted to catch the time as it spayed across the headlines on the screen. It read 3:00 PM. _He must be walking home now_ , Sugawara thought. 

“Ah, it was okay. I guess we’re all just…trying to bounce back onto our feet.” Through the speaker of the phone, the kicking of rocks could be heard as Daichi walked. 

“Did you guys do a lunch practice today?”

“Nah, we agreed it was best to have a little day off. Coach wasn’t gonna be there anyway.”

“Ah.”

“Yeah.”

Sugawara chewed on his lip nervously and fiddled with the corner of his blanket at the slightly awkward silence that seemed to overcome the phone line. 

_You have questions Suga, just fucking ask them. Break this awkward ice, he knows what you want to say._

“So,” Sugawara paused for a moment before forcing himself to continue, “How is everyone?…I didn’t even hear what happened after everyone went home.”

“Well for starters, I think Kageyama feels pretty cool with his new bandages.”

Sugawara smiled at the image his brain resurfaced. When Kageyama had made it to Kuroo’s after the hospital, he had some bandaids and patches on various parts of his beaten face. He did look pretty cool.

“Best believe Hinata and him are slowly getting back to their normal selves,” Daichi continued, “But…there’s tension there. They’re both a little shaken up. You can see it.”

* * *

  
_Kageyama walked ahead, milk carton in his hand, and straw lodged between his teeth as he chewed at it nervously. For the last few days, not only was his brain wracked up with thoughts of the weekend's torture, but the name he had heard and couldn’t stop thinking about was nagging at him in suit._

**_Iwaizumi._ **

_Iwaizumi was there that night._

_Was he apart of it? Had he been trying to help him?_

_Kageyama had tried asking Daichi, but it got shrugged off and turned down every time._

_“No,” Daichi would say, “You were really out of it, you were probably just hearing things.”_

_But he was so sure. And this unanswered thought just added more to the anxieties he was feeling. Even though Daichi had the best intentions, the way he waved off Kageyama’s concern made him feel as if he couldn’t reach out about the other conflicts he was experiencing._

_He flinched every time his mother turned on the TV._

_Anytime his sister said something as simple as. “Hey guess what?” or “Did you hear?” his skin received a chill of goosebumps._

_The mere sight of his middle school uniform had him curled up on his bedroom floor sobbing into his carpet._

_He could pretend he was fine, but it was torture._

_An irritating slurping sound filled his ears as he began to suck aimlessly on the straw of the now empty carton. He looked down at it. Shit, I have to go get another one._

_He turned around to make his way back to the vending machine, but he stopped immediately in his tracks and locked eyes with a very startled Hinata._

_Hinata flinched in place and held two unopened milk cartons close to his chest, quickly evading Kageyama’s eyes and focusing on the cement before him._

_Kageyama furrowed his eyebrows, “You following me or something?”_

_“U-uh, no! I just…maybe…”_

_“Tch.” Kageyama looked away, looking up at the sky and squinting at the sunlight hitting his face instead. His head was still a little beat up. He should’ve been avoiding the sun, or movement for that matter._

_But if he really wanted to avoid the sun, he would have to avoid Hinata and that appeared impossible._

_“I just wanted to give you this milk.”_

_“I already have milk.”_

_“But you finished it. You were going to get another one.”_

_“Jesus, are you stalking me now too?”_

_“No! Shut up! Anyone could hear your obnoxious straw slurping from a mile away!”_

_Kageyama looked down at his empty carton and frowned. Yeah, he’s right._

_“….Fine.” Kageyama walked toward the smaller boy and grabbed hold of his wrist, causing him to almost drop one of the cartons in the process. He began to walk quickly, dragging Hinata behind him, “But we’re going to sit down.”_

_Hinata allowed Kageyama to drag him to the side of the school where everyone had already cleared out. All that was left there for them was a curb and a small patch of uncut dirty grass._

_Kageyama cringed at the sight of it and sat down on the curb, settling himself on the edge and as far from the grass as possible._

_Hinata settled down next to him, but nowhere near as diligently, allowing for the dirty to grass to grace his pants and leave slight stains on his school uniform._

_Kageyama cringed, but on the inside, his heart skipped a beat as it filled with endearment. Was there something else he was forgetting from Friday night? Other than Iwaizumi’s name ringing through his head, it felt as if there was another piece of the puzzle missing. Something to do with Hinata aside from the fact that he had beat the living shit out of him._

_“So,” Hinata handed the new milk carton to Kageyama and fiddled with his own, “What did your parents say when they saw you?”_

_Kageyama sighed, “They were pissed. Said I was stupid for letting myself get jumped.”_

_“Would’ve been worse if they knew that you let someone smaller than you beat you up.”_

_“Yeah, yeah. Shut up, dumbass.”_

_Hinata smiled slightly. His nerves were ruining him. He wanted things to be the same, and the ring of dumbass from the taller's mouth made him feel as if it could be. But, he knew many things wouldn’t._

_He knew he’d never forget the sight of his upperclassmen’s blood. Or the sounds of their sobs. Or the looming fear of everything ending in a second by the simple push of a button. Or, the thought plaguing him right now, what was to come of him and Kageyama?_

_“Um, so…did Oikawa mean what he said?”_

_Kageyama’s head snapped in his direction, “Huh?”_

_“About…you liking me…like that?”_

_Oh._

_There it was. That’s what he forgot._

_His face flushed bright red and he turned his head straight to the floor in embarrassment._

_Hinata knew he wasn’t going to get a response unless he aided him in his confession. He would do it even if meant rejection._

_“Because…I like you too.”_

_Slowly, Kageyama turned his head back into Hinata’s direction. “Y-You do?”_

_Hinata nodded._

_Kageyama chewed his lip, “So…what does this mean?”_

_“It could mean anything,” Hinata shrugged, “But we don’t need to hurry and act on it right now. We’re all still really shaken up. I know you don’t like to admit it but I know you’re scared and hurting, so I want you to take some time to heal. I need it too. For now, all I want you to know is that I’m here for you, and you can always be honest with me.”_

_Tears began to well up in Kageyama’s eyes, but he did his best to fight them._

_Don’t, he thought to himself, be honest. He told you to be honest. Listen to him sometimes, he cares about you._

_With that affirming thought, Kageyama allowed for the tears to fall. He turned his head away in embarrassment, but the firm hold he felt wrap around his waist made it all diminish._

_Hinata pulled the larger close to his body and rubbed his back, “I’m here. It’s gonna be okay. It's only gonna go up from here.”_

_Kageyama allowed for his head to rest on Hinata’s shoulder and he felt his body relax even further as Hinata moved his other hand up to stroke his hair._

_“Will it stop being scary one day?”_

_He felt Hinata nod against his head, “Until then and even after, I’m going to be right here by your side.”_

_Kageyama clung to Hinata’s shoulder tightly, every worry he ever felt slowly fading as he held the boy in his grip._

_“Thank you, Shoyo.”_

* * *

  
Sugawara smiled slightly as he continued to fiddle with the corner of his blanket.

“I’m glad to hear they were able to come today. I worried about them.”

“Yeah, me too. Seeing them out on the school grounds was a bit of a relief. I’m glad they aren’t dealing with it all on their own.”

Suga nodded to himself, those two were always much better tackling things as a pair.

“I’m glad they could find some consolation in each other.”

“It’s not only them,” Daichi remarked, “Asahi had Nishinoya attached to his hip every time they were outside of class.”

“Really?” Suga giggled. “Well, it’s about time those two weirdos started spending more time around each other."

“It’s funny. I’m pretty sure they walked home together too.”

* * *

  
_Nishinoya stayed close to Asahi as they walked in the direction of his house, his small hand holding the larger's behind his back._

_Asahi looked down and smiled, “Why are you doing that? Trying to hide?”_

_Noya put his free hand to his chest, mocking an expression of genuine offense at the question._

_“No. For your information, if our hands are held out next to each other,” Noya moved their intertwined hands from behind his back to the spot between them where they’d usually rest, “Then look, I’m far away and can’t touch you. But, if they’re like this,” he moved their hands back where they rested behind him and moved his body so that it was pressed right against Asahi’s, “Then I can be right here next to you.”_

_It was an innocent action someone like Nishinoya probably didn’t give a second thought as it was done, but for someone like Asahi, his heart was captured._

_He had to look away and cough as he became so flustered he choked on his breath._

_“Woah, you okay there?”_

_“Yeah, yeah, I’m okay.”_

_Nishinoya’s playful aura faded as he focused on the scenery in front of them, the rows of houses appearing as a scenic million dollar painting he thought he would never ever view again outside of the tight suffocating escape room walls. Really, he never thought he would get to see it again._

_Asahi was quick to take notice at the change of mood in their walk and untangled his hand from Nishinoya’s. He instead moved his arm to rest around Nishinoya’s shoulders, somehow pulling his body even closer._

_“Now it’s my turn to ask if you’re okay.”_

_Nishinoya looked up at him, “…Are you even okay, really?”_

_Asahi frowned, “No. Not really.”_

_Noya turned his head back to the front, “I thought we were gonna die in there.”_

_“Honestly Noya, I did too.”_

_There was a pause as they walked for a few more minutes in silence before Nishinoya spoke again._

_“What do we do now?”_

_It was a simple thing for them both to mentally acknowledge that life may never be the same for them again, but they also knew that there were ways to cope. One of those ways could be each other._

_Asahi stopped in his tracks and turned Nishinoya’s body so he was facing him, “Now, we help each other recover. We won’t forget, but we can try to forgive.”_

_“…Do you think Tanaka forgave me?”_

_Asahi smiled at Noya’s concern about Tanaka that has been living in his being since the moment he put the knife to his skin, “I don’t think he was ever angry with you in the first place.”_

_“O-okay.”_

_“The real question is…do you forgive me?”_

_Nishinoya peered up at him with a face of confusion as if there wasn’t even a moment within that unmentionable evening that his morals were brought into question._

_“What would I have to forgive you for?”_

_“For keeping that story from you…the girl from Seijoh…the baby thing…my parents…her parents.”_

_He was quick to shake his head at him and place his hands on either side of his face, “Of course, Asahi. I’m not even upset. If anything you should be upset. You heard what he said, I was gonna leave you. I had plans to take off and I didn’t even tell you. I was going to, believe me. Wherever I was to go I wanted you to come with me.”_

_“Shh, shh,” Asahi rubbed his arms as the boy rambled, “It’s okay. It did hurt at the moment, but that’s only because I didn’t know. I know now, it’s okay.”_

_Nishinoya nodded to himself, “You know now..yeah. So, in that case, …after all is said and done, will you come with me?”_

_Asahi smiled down at him, “I don’t know where you’re going, but I promise you, Noya, I’m there.”_

_Nishinoya smiled up at him brightly, “I’m so glad…thank you, Asahi.”_

_With a gentle cup of his face, Asahi placed a kiss on Noya’s forehead._

_“Anything for you.”_

* * *

  
“I’m actually surprised about Asahi,” Daichi’s feet dragging along the pavement was still heard through the phone’s speaker, “He’s doing a lot better than I thought he would. That or he’s hiding it really well.”

“Probably the second one,” Suga ran a hand through his hair, “He has Noya though, and I imagine that’s a really good help.”

“Oh yeah, I can see it. They’re definitely helping each other a lot.”

Sugawara turned down the volume of the television even more as the news broadcast switched to a commercial break. 

“Did you see Tanaka at all? It’s pretty weird if he and Noya aren’t all over the place together.”

“Yeah, I saw him. Honestly, out of everyone, he looks to be the worst in terms of being shaken up.”

Suga frowned, “Why do you say that?”

“He flinches anytime someone comes up behind him…his head is straight down while he’s walking. He was bumping into people all kinds. He’s still putting a smile on but I can see right through him.”

“It’s gonna break me to see him like that…”

“It’s not a nice sight, I know. From what I can see he’s sort of distancing himself from Noya because he wants him to have some time alone with Asahi. He probably figures they have their own shit to sort out.”

“For sure. I just hope he has someone he can turn to, too.”

* * *

  
_Tanaka stood still in the middle of his school grounds and watched as the students began to clear out. There was laughter and roughhousing and playfulness that anyone would expect from a group of high schoolers being dismissed on a Monday afternoon._

_But he couldn’t move._

_He would have to go home and he really just didn’t want to go home._

_Whilst trapped in the godforsaken escape room, all he wanted to do was go home. But now home became something that was a reminder, even in the briefest sense._

_A glimpse of the television and the violence portrayed on the screen, the shiny twinkle of his father's sharp knife as he cut through the meat for dinner, the family gossip of secrets and rumors of relatives being thrown around._

_These were all such innocent things before. Innocent things that Tanaka found no issue being apart of. But now, they held a sinister memory that troubled him every time he stepped inside his house over the last couple of days._

_School wasn’t much better, but as it began to clear out and quiet down he figured that it just might be._

_What always takes your mind off things, Tanaka?_

_Volleyball. He would stay back and play volleyball._

_He was eternally grateful when he saw Ennoshita coming his way and a wave of relief washed over him as he raised his arm up to wave._

_Ennoshita smiled back at him and walked until he was right in front of him, “Heading home, Ryu?”_

_“Oh, uh..no. I was gonna stick around and practice. I was wondering if you wanted to come?”_

_Ennoshita seemed genuinely upset as he shook his head and placed a hand on Tanaka’s shoulder, “Sorry, man. I have a huge chem test tomorrow, I have to head home.”_

_“Oh, yeah. That’s right.”_

_Deep down Tanaka knew that if Ennoshita was aware of all of the troubling events that happened that Friday night, he wouldn’t have left Tanaka’s side. But he didn’t know. Nobody knew. And with all of the other boys preoccupied with their own healing, he had to suffer alone._

_“I’ll catch you tomorrow though! I promise we can do some practice rounds then,” Ennoshita began to run off, briefly turning around and waving to him, “Later!”_

_Tanaka waved and whispered to only himself, “Later.”_

_With a sigh, he walked over to the gym. School had just finished and there was no doubt in his mind it would still be open right now. He didn’t care if he was on his own. Hurling some balls toward a vacant wall was bound to take some edge off._

_Except when he finally arrived at the gym and walked in, he wasn’t alone. Moving from the corner of the room pushing a cart of volleyballs was Kiyoko, in all her beautiful everyday glory._

_But for the first time in his life, Tanaka wasn’t happy to see Kiyoko. The last thing he wanted was for her to see him in such a low spot. He could try to hide it but he knew it was no use. This poor girl has been dealing with him forever, and she’ll see right through him if he tries to pretend._

_“Hey, Tanaka.” Her voice was gentle, and suddenly Tanaka was so very happy to see her because the sound of her voice took him back home. A good home. With nothing scary or threatening to be found._

_“Hi.”_

_His own gentle tone caught her off guard as she turned her head and narrowed her eyes at him. It took her a whole grand total of two seconds to realize his face wasn’t the way it normally was. He was unhappy. Or scared. Or both._

_She moved toward him, cart of volleyballs still being pushed before her._

_“Are you alright?”_

_The same fake smile he wore many times that day came back. He couldn’t disappoint her and most importantly he couldn’t worry her._

_“Yeah, I am. Why?”_

_She shrugged her shoulders, “I was just asking…” There was a small pause as she thought of what to say next, taking Tanaka by surprise because she never usually engaged with him, especially when they were left alone, “How was your weekend?”_

_Tanaka gulped. The weekend._

_“It was good.”_

_“It sucks that the Blue Puppet went under like that. I loved that place…at least you guys weren’t around when it happened though.”_

_He gulped again, much harder this time and he was sure that she had heard it, “Y-yep.”_

_Her eyes narrowed on him again, “Tanaka,” she was as gentle as he had ever heard her and he was even more caught off guard when she placed her hand on his arm in a soothing motion._

_Tanaka let out a breath and allowed himself to be engulfed in the comfort of the simple, barely-there touch._

_His moment of comfort was quickly broken as he felt her hand lift up the sleeve of his t-shirt, and her hand’s motion halted._

_“….Tanaka..” Her eyes were glued on the bandaged up scars on his arm. Her expression went from neutral and caring to concerned and frightened. “What is this?”_

_Tanaka’s eyes widened when he looked down and caught her stare on his arm, “I-I uh…I got jumped in Tokyo…Kageyama too...even Hinata.”_

_She turned to look at him, a frown overpowering all of her features. Tanaka had never seen such an expression on her before, but he thought she looked so beautiful. So very beautiful._

_“Why didn’t you tell me?”_

_He tilted his head in confusion, “I uh…I didn’t think it mattered?”_

_Kiyoko had never shown much interest before in Tanaka and his reckless escapades that always got him hurt or in trouble, so why now? What was it that made her want to know? And on top of that, what made her so interested in speaking to him today of all days?_

_“Of course it matters Tanaka…” she appeared slightly hurt before she recoiled and seemed to come to a realization within herself._

_Obviously he doesn’t think it matters to you, when have you ever paid him any sort of interest?”_

_“Listen,” she put her hand on his shoulder this time, avoiding the wounded area, “I know I may not show it, but I really do care. You mean a lot to me and I would really hate to see you hurt. You can talk to me whenever you need to.”_

_Tanaka felt as if he could cry, and the overpowering wave of emotion didn’t stop any of his words that flooded out of his mouth like a tsunami ready to take out anyone in its path._

_“I love you.”_

_“Aaaand alright, moment’s gone. Did you want me to toss to you for a bit?”_

_For the first time that day, Tanaka smiled a real genuine smile. He even found himself laughing, cursing his own stupidity, and praising her ability to move right past it._

_“Yeah, I’d like that.”_

* * *

  
“I should really talk to him when I get back…”

“Yeah,” Daichi sighed, “I feel really bad…”

Sugawara fought back the urge to gnaw at the inside of his cheek as he talked to Daichi, his voice through the speaker causing him quite a load of grief in the pit of his stomach.

The thought of why he was feeling such a way led him to remember another extremely poignant event from Friday night’s numerous events. Yamaguchi and Tsukishima. That could not have gone over well.

“Did you catch up with Yamaguchi at all? Or Tsukishima? Were they around?”

“I saw them for like two seconds in the hallway, but I didn’t really get a chance to talk to them.”

“So, they were together?”

“Walking together, yes,…but it didn’t look the way it usually did.”

“That I can imagine.”

* * *

  
_As Yamaguchi walked through the hallway keeping one to two steps away from Tsukishima the entirety of the time, he thought about the interaction he overheard between Kuroo and Kenma while staying at his house._

_  
“I don’t care Kenma, you’re quitting.”_

_“But I need the money.”_

_“If you need the money I’ll help you. Hell, even Bokuto and Akaashi would be willing to help. I’m not letting you go back there. I don’t care.”_

_Kenma had been stubborn, and Yamaguchi bet that Kuroo was more than happy to hear that the building ended up blowing up and there was no chance of Kenma ever going back there. But more importantly, Yamaguchi noticed that Kuroo really deeply cared for Kenma. His desire to keep him out of harm's way was strong._

_So why?_

_Why did he decide that he would go and have his way with **his** boyfriend?_

_How would he like it if he decided he would go and sneak around with Kenma?_

_He hadn’t realized his fists were tightly clenched until the pair reached the street just past the school and Tsukishima gently placed his hand over his._

_“You’re all tensed up,” Tsukishima’s voice came out soft and shy as he proceeded to uncurl Yamaguchi’s fingers, but he was quick to swat him away._

_Tsukishima flinched slightly at the way Yamaguchi's hand flung away from him, “Tadashi…”_

_“What?!” Yamaguchi flung around and finally faced the taller boy. Unlike his usual self, his headphones were down at his neck instead of up on his ears as they always were when they’d walk home._

_He took a step back from the smaller, “Listen, I just…I want to make it up. I know this is hard, and I know trusting me again won’t come easy but I won’t stop loving you.”_

_Yamaguchi stared at him blankly and Tsukishima took it as a cue to keep talking. Things needed to be said, his words had to be expressed. If he kept anything in any longer he would explode._

_“I don’t care if you hate me right now. Or if you’re angry. That's all valid and you are allowed to feel this way. But my feelings for you haven’t faltered. I know everything probably fucked with your head, believe me, it fucked with mine. Some of that shit we saw, we may never unsee. But not even for a split second has my brain shifted any of my priorities away from you. So yeah, I fucked up, but even while I was fucking up, you were still the only one who would ever have me the way you have me. The only person I reserve the real me for is you. And I intend on keeping it that way.”_

_Yamaguchi’s eyes widened and it was clear that his anger slightly diminished down an octave, but his softening expression quickly became stern again as he addressed him._

_“I’m still taking in everything that happened. I’m sure you are too. Maybe one day things will be able to go back to the way they were, but not without some serious changes and hard work.”_

_Tsukishima nodded at him quickly, “Of course, anything. Anything you want me to do for you, it’s done.”_

_“Not for me,” Yamaguchi shook his head, “For you.”_

_Tsukishima tilted his head at him and furrowed his eyebrows. This questioning expression was almost always accompanied by a mocking scowl and a mental message of, 'really idiot?' But today it was filled with sadness and a frown that said nothing but 'please work with me, I don’t know what you’re trying to say.'_

_“You need help, Kei. From a doctor. Don’t think I’m gonna sweep the whole other half of what Oikawa said under the rug because I’m angry with you. I don’t care if I’m angry, I still worry about you.”_

_“W-What can I do?”_

_“There are doctors. Therapists. Tons of people that would be more than happy to help you through this.”_

_Tsukishima shook his head, fear filling his golden eyes, “I can’t do that. I can’t. I’m too scared, I-I’ll have to tell them everything, t-they’ll have so many questions, I’ll have to do so much blood work, I-“_

_Yamaguchi grabbed hold of his hand and held it firmly. It had been days since Tsukishima had last felt his hand in his and it was such a calming relief. The soft gentle hold of Yamaguchi’s palms made him forget he was ever worried about anything at all. Yamaguchi was the only person to ever make him feel that way._

_“I’ll be there with you, okay? If it makes you feel better I’ll come to every appointment, I’ll hold your hand through every test they have to do, I’ll be there. You won’t be alone, you don’t have to worry.”_

_Even though Yamaguchi still wore his cold serious expression, Tsukishima felt as if he was surrounded with nothing but love and endless unconditional support._

_Tears welled up in his eyes and he pulled Yamaguchi into an embrace despite his obvious still standing disappointment in him. Yamaguchi flinched for a moment before settling into the boy’s grasp, but his hands lay at his sides._

_“I love you, Tadashi,” Tsukki sobbed, “I’m sorry that I’m just a stupid boy. I always feel ugly and angry and I go do stupid fucking things that I shouldn’t do. I’m sorry you’re stuck with me. But I love you. Thank you for being here.”_

_After a short pause of Yamaguchi processing the words Kei had spoken, he gently lifted his arms and placed his hands on his back._

_Those hands. Those arms. Tsukishima had known better now. No one could ever beat the comfort brought on by a boy like Tadashi. And no one ever would._

_“I love you too, Kei. It’ll be okay. ‘Just need some time.”_

* * *

  
“Do you think they’ll make it work?” Sugawara frowned as he thought of the pair. They had never been very open with their relationship, but they had still always come as a set.

Wherever Tsukishima went, Yamaguchi followed, so Sugawara felt a sense of strange despair at the thought of seeing them separated despite his limited time left at Karasuno. 

Daichi sighed, “What can we do? I honestly think they’ll figure something out.”

Sugawara nodded to no one except himself, “Tsukishima has his head on right for the most part. I don’t think he really has any ill intentions despite what he did…”

“Oh, for sure. I don’t think he really meant any harm.”

Suga felt his heart tense up at the sound of Daichi’s agreement. Sure, it was his own thoughts being voiced, but having Daichi feel the same way shifted his mind to the real reason why he may actually agree.

In Suga’s case, there was deep-seated guilt in the suffering of those around him. He genuinely believes good things happen to bad people and that Tsukishima found himself going through some rough shit in the wrong place, at the wrong time, causing him to seek affection from another.

Daichi, on the other hand, found himself in Tsukishima’s shoes. The ‘player’. The ‘heartbreaker’. He has played that role in Suga’s life plenty of times and no matter what the circumstances were, it hurt. It almost seemed to Suga that Daichi only justified Tsukishima's actions as a way to affirm himself that what he would always do to Suga (and others) wasn’t all that bad. 

Before his mind could race any further, Sugawara decided to change the subject.

“…Do we know what happened to Oikawa and Iwaizumi?”

“You’re gonna love this one. I didn’t wanna stress you out after everything so I didn’t tell you, but there was a reason I made us all keep quiet and pretend we didn’t know anything. Iwaizumi had sent me a text message that night..”

* * *

_As the flames grew larger and the smoke blew higher, Iwaizumi knew that it would only be minutes before neighboring buildings of apartments and workers out in the dead of night would be surrounding the area to see what had happened._

_He knew that Oikawa's awed expression watching the flames was troubling, and he didn’t want anyone to see the pair of them standing out there like that. They could have easily acted as if they were innocent patrons who stumbled outside upon hearing the blast, but Iwaizumi’s guilty mind was in no place to play pretend._

_“T-Torou.”_

_Oikawa didn’t respond. The light from the fire lit up his beautiful face in the most twisted romantic way Iwaizumi had ever seen._

_“Torou.”_

_He was enchanted. He looked the same way he did the time Iwaizumi brought him to watch a firework show a few months before. His eyes were widened in a gentle way, not one that made them bulge from his head or look scared and surprised, but a way that made them look completely enamored. His mouth was slightly parted and quiet gasped breaths came from between them as he let himself succumb to the effect the beauty of the colors brought him._

_He looked so perfect that night. Absolutely stunning. Iwaizumi hated himself for looking at him the same way now, while the boy watched the disaster he had created._

_Iwaizumi grabbed hold of Oikawa’s arm roughly, yanking his body around to face him. Oikawa had flinched and those wide eyes grew to that fear-ridden shape they weren’t at before. Iwaizumi hadn’t realized how stern his face must’ve looked._

_“That’s it, Torou. Are you happy now?”_

_Oikawa shook his head, “N-No.”_

_“I knew you wouldn’t be.”_

_“I-Iwa-chan…you’re hurting me.”_

_Iwaizumi thought his strong grip would have been making a statement, but seeing Oikawa’s miserable expression hit him hard. He sighed and let his grip loosen, his hand falling to Oikawa's and intertwining their fingers._

_“I’m sorry.”_

_Oikawa squeezed his hand in response and sniffled. Iwaizumi was glad he didn’t talk because he knew he would cry and the last thing he wanted to see at that moment was Oikawa cry._

_“Listen, Torou. You worry me. A lot. You’ve done some fucked up shit in the many years I’ve known you, but this is really something else.”_

_Oikawa turned his gaze to the floor to avoid Iwaizumi’s eyes._

_“No, no, none of that. Look at me.” Iwaizumi grabbed either side of Oikawa’s face, making sure his movements were much more gentle and affectionate rather than pointed and harsh. He lifted Oikawa’s face so that he was looking at him, his eyes already welling up with tears. Don’t let him break you Hajime. “Something is wrong Oikawa. Do you understand that? You’re losing your fucking shit.”_

_“N-No. No, I’m not. D-Don’t say that about me, you know I’m okay.”_

_As the tears spilled down his cheeks Iwaizumi was quick to wipe them away with his thumbs._

_“You are not okay Torou, and there isn’t anything wrong with that,” Iwaizumi took a quick glance at the burning building and shook his leg anxiously as the dawning of ‘no time left to play around’ set off a reminder in his head, “Listen. You can’t be here any longer. Both of us are in way too fucking deep now. I don’t trust you around any of these people anymore, and more importantly, I don’t trust you alone without me around.”_

_Oikawa tilted his head slightly, seeking out the affectionate stroke of Iwaizumi’s hand on his cheek, but Iwaizumi only kept his hand still and serving to the purpose of keeping their gazes locked._

_“W-What are you trying to say?”_

_“I’m saying we’re fucking taking off understand? No going to get shit, no stopping at home, nothing. I’ll go take some cash out of my savings and we’re leaving. Got it?”_

_“W-Where are we going?”_

_“Away from here. Far. We’ll figure it out, but Torou I can’t have you stay here. You’ve gone too far this time, there’s no other way to fix this.”_

_Oikawa’s hands shot up and he grabbed hold of Iwaizumi’s biceps tightly, seeming to search for the warmth he always knew._

_“You won’t leave me, will you?”_

_“What?”_

_“A-Are you gonna take me somewhere far away and then just leave me there?”_

_“Jesus, Oikawa. Of fucking course not. I’m not leaving your side.”_

_“O-Okay.” With a choking sob Iwaizumi couldn’t resist, Oikawa shoved his head into the shorter man's chest, his back shaking with every breath and tear he shed._

_Iwaizumi sighed and rubbed his back with one hand, reaching for his phone with the other. “It’s okay. I got you.”_

_He first opened up his text messages with Kuroo and Bokuto, and in the new lifeless chatroom, he typed one final message._

**I’ll have this all taken care of. You guys won’t ever have to worry about him again. We’re gonna leave. So please, for my sake at least, let’s act like we know nothing. I know I’m in no place to bargain but it’s all I ask. You won’t hear from us again.**

_Once he was satisfied with the message he copied it and opened up a new chat with Daichi. He pasted the message and sent it, then proceeded to turn off his phone and toss it in his pocket. Somewhere along their journey, he would have to toss their phones._

_He placed his other now free hand around Oikawa so that he was holding him close. “C’mon, Shittykawa. You’ve done enough of a number on me for tonight.”_

_Oikawa breathed a sigh of relief at the playfulness of the nickname and Iwaizumi’s tone and looked up at him with the prettiest eyes he could muster._

_“Are we leaving now?”_

_“Yeah, we’re leaving.”_

_“Okay.”_

_Oikawa was more than happy to be leaving with Iwaizumi and he felt safe knowing that he would always be with him no matter where they ended up._

_Iwaizumi was just happy that Oikawa agreed to go with him. He never wanted the boy out his line of vision. He feared that the fire he created in Tokyo would only create an even bigger one within himself. One even stronger and hotter than the one he had before._

_Maybe he would fuck up Iwaizumi’s life. But at least Iwaizumi could rest knowing that everyone else got to move on, forget, recover, and find happiness._

_He was sure that alongside Oikawa, no matter how fucked up he may be, he would find his own._

* * *

“Well, I hope he finds some sort of comfort in his life one day…” Sugawara’s voice trailed off as he thought about Oikawa. The star player, the popular student, the smart kid. He figured now that even the best of them all could eventually crack under the pressure.

A smile could be heard in Daichi’s voice, “You have a really big heart, y’know?”

“Yeah,” Suga shifted uncomfortably on the couch, “I know.”

“Guess that just leaves…”

Sugawara waited for him to continue, but took it upon himself when he didn’t.

“..Us?”

“Yeah, us.”

Sugawara had been waiting to get to talk to Daichi about the big US. What did it mean now? They had kissed. It wasn’t the most amazing thing he ever experienced in his life but it had still happened. That had to mean something, right?

“What about us?”

“Well, what now?”

Suga chewed his lip. From the day he had met Daichi in his first year at Karasuno, he had known what he wanted. Now, more than ever, he could say once again that he knew. Only this time, it wasn’t what he wanted that he was sure about, it was what he needed.

“I don’t know…”

“What do you say, Suga? Why don’t we give ourselves a try?”

Sugawara chewed on the skin inside his cheek hard. He had been waiting for so _so_ long to hear these very words. He dreamt of the day that Daichi would finally just want him and no one else. The day he would want to try and make him his. 

But Sugawara didn’t think today would be that day.

“No.”

The other line was silent for a moment and Sugawara assumed that Daichi was processing the quick rejection.

“…Yeah, I guess I deserve that.”

Sugawara shook his head even though Daichi couldn’t see him, “It’s not that you _deserve_ anything, but all I know is that I _don’t_ deserve to run the risk of getting my heart broken.”

Daichi sighed, “I’m sorry I put you through all that, I understand how you feel."

“Mhm.” _No, you don’t._

“I don’t want to lose you though, Suga. You know I love you.”

“I know, I love you too…and you won’t.”

“See you tomorrow?”

“Hm, yeah. I’ll try to come tomorrow. Maybe we can do a lunch hour practice.”

“That’s probably a good idea.”

“Okay, Daichi.”

“Okay, Suga.”

With a giggle, Sugawara hung up the phone, feeling better than he has in quite a long while when it came to his Daichi situation. For what was probably the first time in his life, Suga felt that he had done something right.

_“Investigators are saying that the explosion was likely a result of faulty cables in the building’s control room-"_

Sugawara grabbed the remote of the turned down TV and switched it off. Because he could do that. Because he was in control. If he didn’t want to see or hear what was playing on that screen, he didn’t have to.

He got up from the couch and walked over to his living room window, gently pushing the curtain aside. His driveway was still empty and his parents who he had faked a fever to wouldn’t be home from work for another couple of hours. 

Just a few days ago, a couple of hours had felt like an eternity. He wished he could have an eternity of this moment right now, with the afternoon sun gracing his window, leaving him alone with the thoughts of himself and the thoughts of his friends.

So his hopeless loving side was put on display to the one he loved most, oh well. He got a chance to overcome it now. He stood his ground. He isn’t anyone's on-call lover anymore.

Maybe Nishinoya and Tanaka have some internal power struggle inducing issues. That can only make their friendship and their work as a team during volleyball even stronger.

Yeah, Asahi had it rough growing up, and he carried a plaguing secret for the last year that led to his own suffering, but now it wasn’t a secret anymore. He was no longer alone. His friends were there to help him.

Yamaguchi had to face some heartbreak, but it taught him that holding too much trust for anyone (even a lover) could be dangerous. This only made him wiser, and that was just what he needed.

Tsukishima had been in pain for too long and was too afraid and prideful to let anyone know. Much like Asahi, he no longer had to hurt in silence.

Hinata and Kageyama had done what they do best. Fought. Except this time it wasn’t for the selfishness in their own minds, but the goodness and love they have for others in their own hearts. They’re young, they’re learning, and they will continue to do great things for many people.

Sugawara smiled to himself. There was no way he was going to let what Oikawa did bring them all down. There was no question that they were all deeply wounded by the memories of that Friday night, but he would never dare let it stop him or those he loved. 

It may not by any means have been a ‘sweet escape’, but it didn’t kill them. And like Daichi had said that very Friday afternoon, what doesn’t kill Karasuno only makes them stronger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's all..That's the end. I honestly never expected anyone to actually read this, but the reception I got was super exciting! I know my writing isn't for everyone, and I am so sorry to those that have commented saying they were scared or made anxious by it! Still, I hope this was as fun for you guys as it was for me. Here's a FUN FACT! In the original drafting, I was gonna make Oikawa actually set the bomb off in chapter 12 whilst him and Iwa were in the building, but once i got to writing it and actually got invested in Oikawa's character, I decided against it. 
> 
> Anyway, there's not much more for me to say other than thank you!! Thank you all so much for reading and enjoying, and of course thank you so so much for all of the comments. They seriously helped me to power through and get this done. I hope this ending brought some consolidation to your grief and continue to stay safe!
> 
> Let's do this all again soon, and never EVER trust a puppet!


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